(A)rrogant Avian Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Just as there are gay stereotypes (effeminate, happy, into fashion, etc.) and lesbian stereotypes (butch, sporty, handy, etc.), with none of these stereotypes being completely true, are there asexual stereotypes? Or are we not portrayed enough in the media to even have a stereotype? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Robin L Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Asexuals may often be equated to being nerdy, and vice versa. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Scottthespy Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Cold. Emotionless. Driven by logic. Unable to understand society and its relationships, even the non lust/romance driven ones. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ashmedai Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Yes. There was this one day I was at the pub, and me and my mate were standing at the bar waiting to order our next drink. A barmaid that we both know comes down our end of the bar to pour someone a drink, notices old mate first, and says hello. She then notices me a fwe seconds later, and quite excitedly says taht she had a dream about me the night before. I was about to shrug it off, when my mate next to me loses his shit (he apparently liked her). So, as we were sitting out the back having our drinks, I couldn't help smiling because I thought it was quite amusing. Old mate notices, thought I was smiling because she dreamt about me, and said "hey you're asexual, you're suppose to be completely neutral!" As if I'm not spose to be affect by what? And is if I'm not spose to be interested in anyone in anyway? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Perseus Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 I have never heard of any. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mycroft is Yourcroft Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Anti-social, introverted, doesn't care about what they look like, unaffected by charming people, boring, intelligent, cold /bullshitstereotypes Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hikishi Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Um not had much of that so far, most of my friends forget I am asexual most of the time. But that doesn't bother me haha! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
The Ace Otaku Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 cold, nerdy, anti-social, emotionless, psychopathic. Just a few that I know people have labeled me as for being asexual Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Warning: this will be offensive! I often see in places where asexuality is being discussed by people who clearly have no understanding of what asexuality is, things being said like: ''They are just fat ugly nerds who can't get a fuck, and use asexuality as an excuse for their failure as a human..if they just lost some weight and sorted their acne out, believe me, they'd admit that they want sex just as much as you or I and be out there trying to get it'' (I have seen this a lot, it's a petty general stereotype that asexuals are just people who can't get sex, so they hide behind a 'made up' label to make it seem as though they have made a conscious choice not to have sex when really they just can't get it *sigh*) Then of course whenever you see a very attractive asexual person (on youtube or whatever) people say ''I don't know.. she/he doesn't look asexual (which comes from the stereotype that all asexuals are ugly) they probably just need a good fucking then they'll realize what they are missing'' *eye roll* Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Xavy Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 As said above, Nerdy for sure, Like the Sheldon Cooper type Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Eva Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Stuck-up Picky Holding out Waiting Religious Career-driven Shy Cold Immature Closeted gay/lesbian Closeted pervert But also: Pure Self-respecting Busy Focused Quote Link to post Share on other sites
animanova Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 I think nerdy, prudes, agender/androgynous/aliens, or religiously-affiliated to the point of extremism. Honestly, I haven't seen any media representation in a good or bad light, so it's hard to say. Some more positive ones I've heard: mature, beautiful, intelligent. Also, I've heard of someone referring to asexuals as "unicorns". Take that as you will? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Alchemistress Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 No one's mentioned childish O-O which I've heard a lot online. Such as asexuals are too oblivious/ immature to handle grown up things like sex. It's really a really condesending and annoying stereotype in my opinion. Then again I'm pretty sure most stereotypes are. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tarfeather Posted March 7, 2015 Share Posted March 7, 2015 Cold. Emotionless. Driven by logic. Unable to understand society and its relationships, even the non lust/romance driven ones. Anti-social, introverted, doesn't care about what they look like, unaffected by charming people, boring, intelligent, cold Hahah, sounds like my girlfriend is the incarnation of asexuality. ^_^ Warning: this will be offensive! I often see in places where asexuality is being discussed by people who clearly have no understanding of what asexuality is, things being said like: ''They are just fat ugly nerds who can't get a fuck, and use asexuality as an excuse for their failure as a human..if they just lost some weight and sorted their acne out, believe me, they'd admit that they want sex just as much as you or I and be out there trying to get it'' (I have seen this a lot, it's a petty general stereotype that asexuals are just people who can't get sex, so they hide behind a 'made up' label to make it seem as though they have made a conscious choice not to have sex when really they just can't get it *sigh*) Then of course whenever you see a very attractive asexual person (on youtube or whatever) people say ''I don't know.. she/he doesn't look asexual (which comes from the stereotype that all asexuals are ugly) they probably just need a good fucking then they'll realize what they are missing'' *eye roll* And this is why I'm glad that regular people aren't part of my life currently.. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DigbyDriver Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 Quite a few of the traits mentioned here are also often associated with INTJ personality types. I've seen it mentioned around that INTJs can lean towards asexuality more often than other types. What are your thoughts? Does the type predict the sexual orientation, or does the orientation affect the type you're most likely to develop? Also, if you choose to use other types of personality tests, like the Riso-Hudson Enneagram test, do you think your score simillarly affects your asexuality or helps instill certain stereotypical traits that could be linked to asexuality? I guess the question really is, if we do develop stereotypical behavior, is it because of sexual orientation or another underlying factor we all share to some extent? Since sexuality matures later than personality, could it be that stereotypes linked to asexual identification are actually indicators of certain shared personality traits? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
N Dakota Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 Digby, that would make a fascinating poll for specifically ace spectrum people. Is there any correlation between personality types and asexuality? I wouldn't know! The stereotypes I've encountered have been when I've come out to people. I've had people ask how that could be , since I've dated people. As far as that goes, they equate it as a aromantic since for them sex and love are inextricable from one another. I've also been told it is a waste because so many people find me to be very attractive, or that my looks or relationships some how discredit the fact that I am certain that demi-grey suits me. I agree that the INTJ personality profile is the prevailing conception that I've encountered. Even friends tell me I "don't act asexual". Well heck, how can I? It's not a personality trait. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RK800 Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 Abused, stuck up, extremely intelligent (okay, maybe not inaccurate ;) ), never wears anything revealing, ugly, fat, nerd, cold, no emotion, incapable of love, depressed, snob, etc. Personally I know I might come across as cold sometimes but that's a defence mechanism since I tend to be in touch with how others feel to a ridiculous extent. I'm definitely capable of love, I love most people in general. Though I am just a bit of a nerd, just a bit. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpy Alien Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 Not counting my mom and three close friends, I don't know anyone who has ever heard of asexuality. (And if they did, they certainly wouldn't get it.) But stereotypes are ridiculous Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Purnkin Spurce Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 Nerdy, ugly (yes that's a stereotype) inexperienced, naive, ignorant, childhood trauma. emotionless, immature. ugh -_- Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DigbyDriver Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 Digby, that would make a fascinating poll for specifically ace spectrum people. Is there any correlation between personality types and asexuality? I wouldn't know! The stereotypes I've encountered have been when I've come out to people. I've had people ask how that could be , since I've dated people. As far as that goes, they equate it as a aromantic since for them sex and love are inextricable from one another. I've also been told it is a waste because so many people find me to be very attractive, or that my looks or relationships some how discredit the fact that I am certain that demi-grey suits me. I agree that the INTJ personality profile is the prevailing conception that I've encountered. Even friends tell me I "don't act asexual". Well heck, how can I? It's not a personality trait. I think I've seen a few other posts about personality traits - especially INTJ - and the connections to asexuality. I know that this specific Myers-Briggs typology has been linked to behaviors and traits usually associated with different spectrums of autism, but it would be interesting to do a poll and see just how many INTJs there are on the site. I know that not everyone agrees on the reliability of the Myers-Briggs test or related personality/cognitive tests out there, but I really would be interested to know the opinion of people who've taken the actual tests and feel that they have some validity and could lend actual insight to how people develop sexual identity alongside personality and thinking habits. I'm normally an English teacher, but I am qualified to teach psychology at the high school level, and I believe that thinking has an enormous impact on how our personalities develop, especial during crucial periods of development during middle and high school. Similar to your experience, I've been told I don't seem like I would be asexual, though I suspect that's because I would be considered attractive to men. However, once I allow people to get to know me, the most many have been able to say is that I'm definitely not like other women. Also like you, I don't feel like being asexual or androgynous is simply a part of my personality, but is rather something heavily tied into my cognitive identity. That being said, did my cognitive identity form from a genetic predisposition towards neutrality in both gender and sexual preference, or are some personalities and thinking habits more likely to cause certain individuals to develop atypical sexual and gender preferences in addition to other habits and mannerisms that most people would consider atypical? Aaaaaand I'm done :) Digby's brain has completed the necessary out-of-class critical thinking for the day. Good stuff though, and I would still be interested in a serious poll if enough firmly planted INTJs were on board. Thanks, Dakota. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SamiBat Posted March 9, 2015 Share Posted March 9, 2015 I know that when I was a lot younger I had gotten the impression from other people that asexuality meant wanting to be alone and not being apart of any kind of relationships - hence why for the longest time I had thought that I couldn't consider myself asexual due to my romantic attractions (but thanks to better access to the right information I understand a lot more than before). I've also heard the naive and childish stereotypes too. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
girltwink666 Posted March 10, 2015 Share Posted March 10, 2015 the one stereotype that hasnt been pointed out btu i always see it directed to ace or aro ppl is like infantilizing them like the whole thing abt like wow lol dragons lol haha or making it to seem like we're all defenseless children that need to be shielded from the world Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AlexPeyton Posted March 10, 2015 Share Posted March 10, 2015 i'm usually stereotyped as a misanthrope, emotionless, cold and generally apathetic because of it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Light02 Posted March 10, 2015 Share Posted March 10, 2015 Awkward. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
jennybunny Posted March 10, 2015 Share Posted March 10, 2015 I've definitely experienced being labelled with the childish/cute/innocent/naive stereotype (which, if true, I don't think has anything to do with my asexuality to be honest). I've also had people say "but you're so nice" as though they expect an asexual to be completely cold and anti-social ^^; Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kuromi Akumura Posted March 10, 2015 Share Posted March 10, 2015 Well these stereotypes are from ex friends of the past and what they stereotyped me after a few seconds of me explaining i that i am ace. So it is beign a cold emotionless robot who cannot feel anyform of love and resents anything to do with love and happiness, hates physical affection and is anti-social has a mental illness or is a childish prude virgin who needs to be 'awakened'. ( THIS got on my nerves repeatedly) hates all couples, all forms of romantic partners, hates hetros, goes around destroying relationships for the hell of it. Is negative and a party pooper in groups because with lecture or 'whine' whenever a sexual joke is said. Is just someone who is bitter because is single. Needs to grow up and stop being immature. Shames others for not beign asexual and tries to make a cult following converting others to asexuality. Will force people close to them to 'become' asexual and brain wash them to hate s*x. Controlling over others lives because wants everyone else to be ace........hmm i think that's all for now... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DigbyDriver Posted March 15, 2015 Share Posted March 15, 2015 I've already posted once, but honestly, I've never come across any of these stereotypes. The few people I've told knew next to nothing about asexuality or androgyny. I did grow up with an allosexual/cis twin, so I've always had someone to model more socially acceptable behavior and explain things I didn't understand. But I really haven't had any trouble other than people being a bit confused because I was married. But being married doesn't disprove asexuality and those that knew both me and my husband had no trouble accepting my sexual and gender identification. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
blossombreeze Posted March 15, 2015 Share Posted March 15, 2015 1. The Socially Awkward 2. Lacking Empathy 3. Serial Killer 4. Robot 5. Androgynous Appearance 6. The Virgin 7. The Special Snowflake 8. The Prude 9. The childish one 10. A plant/banana slug those are the ones i got so far Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AlwaysBeKorra Posted March 15, 2015 Share Posted March 15, 2015 I agree with most of these traits you guys mention - even I have thought many of these things to be true for an asexual until I started researching the subject! It's crazy how a single word can make us assume things out of the blue! I have always been viewed as a heterosexual by my friends and family - as my mum said "but you seem so sexual, just look at what you're wearing! - Even though my parents suspected that I was homosexual (because what else could be the problem?!). It's going to be interesting how my friends will view me after I tell them ;-) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
AlwaysBeKorra Posted March 15, 2015 Share Posted March 15, 2015 1. The Socially Awkward 2. Lacking Empathy 3. Serial Killer 4. Robot 5. Androgynous Appearance 6. The Virgin 7. The Special Snowflake 8. The Prude 9. The childish one 10. A plant/banana slug those are the ones i got so far Hahaha! These need to be the Ace zodiac signs!! Including Eva's "closeted pervert"! :-D Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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