Mackensie Morgan Goff Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 My parents are so belittling that they think they know more than me; but they keep equating the asexual identity with chastity, and I have no idea on what to do because they never listen to me. They always tell me that they've, "been around longer, and they know what the hell they're talking about." So, I was hoping I could get some help, and at last resort make them read some things off of this site so they can get the heck over themselves. Sorry for the little ranting; my main question is, if someone is being rude to you by assuming they know everything about what asexuality is, but they know so little, but I have no idea what to do because I am in between a rock and a hard spot here. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
CNGB Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 To be perfectly honest, your parents sound like the type who simply aren't going to listen. Some people are like that. When I am confronted with people like this, I just ignore it . . . because they aren't going to listen. Do they talk about asexuality only when you bring it up? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
yeshello Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 Sometimes, I find that I just have to stamp people with the "ignorant stamp" and move forward. You can try to educate them about your sexuality, but sometimes it just doesn't work out. And while it's sad to have to do that (especially with your parents), it might be healthier than the stress or anxiety than repeatedly trying to make them understand. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
CNGB Posted February 27, 2015 Share Posted February 27, 2015 If you really, really want to have your parents on your side on this, then there are a few ideas you could do. Perhaps you could try writing them a letter? If you do this then they can't interrupt you--they could stop reading, sure, but you can start off with something like, "I understand that you've been alive and are wiser than me, but it is important to me to at least try to understand where I'm coming from. . . ." Your parents sound like the type to be more likely to listen if you butter them up first. They say flattery gets you nowhere, and sometimes they're right, but if I'm right about your parents then they definitely aren't in this scenario . . . whoever "they" is. :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
JohnDoe1995 Posted March 2, 2015 Share Posted March 2, 2015 I think you should remind your parents that the world (& especially society) has changed a lot in the last two decades. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mackensie Morgan Goff Posted March 2, 2015 Author Share Posted March 2, 2015 Thank y'all so much for responding to my question, but I got one to understand, and the other one doesn't quite care how offensive she is by telling my to, "go have sex", and rather doesn't understand. In her defense, I get that she thinks that sex is, "great, and I shouldn't miss out on it", but I think it's time that she knew that celibacy isn't permanent, but asexuality is. I tried the tactic of talking to my mother by using this site to explain asexuality to her, and she listened; she then knew how frustrating it is to have parents that belittle what I want in the way that she was treated since she was a child and came out as an homosexual to her strict Methodist family, but they didn't care that she was gay. How do I expect my grandfather to get over this, or my Nana or Papa? It seems like I live in a world that I'm just trapped in my little bubble, and it's gonna crash down on me when it pops just trying to advocate for those of us who remained voiceless. I refuse to let any of our LGBT or our allies go voiceless again, and no one should feel like they owe anyone an explanation for how offensive it is. Is it really that "prudish" to not like being told to, "go get laid", and it is right for her to care about my private business behind closed doors. So what, I don't live a "normal" lifestyle in their eyes. I don't want to use the tactic of telling my mom the cold hard truth as it lies out there in the air waiting to come out, and she really is just like my grandmother towards homosexuals as my mom is to asexuals. I guess that really is the way I have to put it to her, but I really don't want to go breaking her heart just to get my point across to her, and if she is like most other people, then she will understand when I tell her that, deny it for a little while, and begin to accept all that she has done wrong towards me. Thank you for hearing me out, and I'll see you next time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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