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Female bodied people who wears men clothes, share your shopping experiences


TardisBlue

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@daveb sometimes I can totally do that, sometimes I just can't, yesterday I couldn't :( Damn I wanna try those trainers so badly!

I've been there many times myself. Sometimes even still, but much less often than in the past. The more you own it the easier it gets, I believe. You have every right to be there! :)

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LadyWallflower

As a woman I find woman's clothes to be too tight and uncomfortable. I never wear woman's jeans. However, I found that loose dresses to be very comfortable. In the summer I just swear a loose dress with shorts under it and I am good. In winter I wear a dress with a sweater and with tights. It is all very comfortable. But besides sweat pants I have sworn off women's pants. They are just not comfortable. I have considered maybe buying a pair or two of men's jeans for when I go hiking, but I have not done so yet.

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Don't know if this has been discussed before but I wanted to rant. Also, sorry if I'm posting this in the wrong section, mods can move it if they want.

I am female, a cis female, but I've always worn boys/men clothes. No offence, but I find women clothes gross and they don't even make sense to me? Anyway, that's not the point. There are a lot of things I hate when I'm shopping:

  1. When I'm checking someting out, "but those are for men" (yes I am an idiot who can't even separate clothes' genders, I needed you to tell me, yes thank you, you're a life saver. and what's that even supposed to mean, what's the point of saying those are for men, am I not allowed to buy them???)
  2. Women's section is over there (again, I'm such an idiot guys, I haven't actually realised I was looking at men's clothes!!!!)
  3. STARING
  4. They don't come in your size (bitch I wear 32" trousers, size S/M tops, uk size 6 shoes, all men sizes btw, explain how the fuck they don't come in my size???)

These are the most common ones. There was this one guy who almost yelled at me, saying 'those are NOT for women', I stared at him so angrily and said 'I KNOW, NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS' he nearly peed himself, moron. Besides, who told you I identify as a woman anyway? I mean I do, but like, how do you know? So rude.

And, my favourite(!) thing about all this, ARE THEY BLIND??? COS I WALK IN THE STORE WEARING MEN CLOTHES ALREADY, CAN YOU NOT SEE ME?????? What's wrong with these people... They're draining my self confidence, I used to not care much, but nowadays I shy away from stores and prefer online shopping cos I don't have to take shit like that.

I definitely can relate. I identify as neutrois and usually wear unisex clothes, and cannot call myself curvy, but I have breasts so people see me as a female. I face the same stupid reactions all the time.

Hell, why? Dear salespeople, you need to care about your sales, not my gender!!!

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I would absolutely love to get more male clothing. I'm not cis in any way, but every time I go to the store I look around the men's section cause for one, men's clothes fit me better, women's clothes are tailored specifically to fit a certain body type/size, and I'm not thin in any way. Plus size women's clothing is TERRIBLE. There's so few choices in colors and patterns, meanwhile if I get guy clothes, I can actually get them in a Large or a Medium when I'm normally a 2x cause they're made bigger. At the moment, my parents refuse to buy me male clothing, but I've gone out with my cis male friends and tried some of their clothes on. I love the way I look in male clothing much more than the way I look in feminine clothes.

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I started wearing boys' shirts years ago because I could never find anything I liked in the girls' section and I got tired of looking there. So now I have a few old girl t-shirts, some newer ones that aren't that bad, and some boy t-shirts that are my favorite and the most comfortable. I also wear unisex hoodies and converse shoes so I guess I dress in a pretty neutral way.

The only part that is all female are my jeans because I actually like how my legs look in them and I've never tried boys' jeans, though I do want to go buy some more clothes from the guys sections. A problem I have is that I'm very skinny so sometimes the shirts might fit me a little weirdly because I'm trying to keep them loose enough so my boobs aren't so noticeable but not so loose that it looks huge on my body, but I make it work XD

And I'm sorry you've been told all that stuff at stores, OP, that sucks :/ It's never happened to me because I go shopping with my mom so they probably just assume we're shopping for someone else or something like that. Then there's the fact that a few people have thought I'm a boy at first glance, so maybe somehow that makes it more "acceptable" to them. But people should be able to wear whatever they want despite their sex and gender, as long as they're covering their parts I don't care, so don't let their opinions affect you and just wear your clothes without shame :)

I remember there was this woman from my country we talked about in class one day.. I can't remember her name but the thing was that in like the 1950s or even before that time (can't remember :/) she just went out dressed in men's clothes and they actually arrested her, and when she was questioned she said that she wore pants every day, under her skirt. I just thought that was epic :D And now there's nothing they can do to you for wearing men's clothes so just do what you're comfortable with and if people don't like it then they can just avert their eyes ^_^

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Well I wear men's clothing but mostly loungeish type clothing like undershirts and pajamas. And when the weather is colder some of my father's old sweaters because, the man can pick a sweater, heh, and well they are warm too, hehe. So I don't really have any in store experience because I'm mostly wearing other people's clothes, heh ;)

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I have to disagree with some people who say men's jeans are more comfortable. From my experience the fabric is thicker and heavier on men's jeans. I do admit that some women's pants (particularly cheap juniors jeans) are uncomfortable, but I recently got some (granted more expensive) women's jeans and they are incredibly comfortable.

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@dash this is the thing that scares me about the future, suits I mean. I never had to wear formal clothes before, but I'm about to gradute and at work I'll probably have to wear suits, at least occasionally, and it scares the hell out of me to go suit shopping :(

I hope you find an ally in the suit buying experience. (Once you know your size, you can order some kinds of suits online, but you will almost certainly have to bring them to a tailor.)

I've also had tailoring experiences that were uncomfortably gendered, sometimes in the most unexpected ways. I brought some clothes to a tailor, an older Russian lady. She was shocked that "a woman [my] age" didn't know how to darn socks and told me to sit right down, and gave me a ten, fifteen minute sewing lesson on the spot.

I mean, it's nice to know how to sew, but I won't say it wasn't awkward!

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nerdperson777

@nerdperson777 your cosplay one looks good to me, but yeah the other one's a bit baggy :)

Well, I kinda need it baggy. I'm going to perform in them. I could barely stretch in the other pair.

I'm hoping to have a back flip by then. If I get permission, I want to drop into splits after the flip. :D I have trouble standing after doing flips when I practice in a gymnastics room so let me not land it on my feet! :P

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My mum won't let me wear men's trousers.

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I have the opposite problem. Male body, but I like skirts and leggings and other such "girl stuff." It's ridiculously hard to find clothing long enough for my legs, and I always get stares and comments like in the original post. I've also noticed that basically all "androgynous" type websites are female bodies dressing a bit more masculine, and few are male bodies dressing more feminine...if that makes sense.

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butterflydreams

Ahh, the old gender sections problem... :P

@Feathers...I share your frustration at the problem of those "androgynous" websites showing female bodied dressing more masculine. Don't get me started on that!

I'm DMAB but the only thing I actually go to a store to physically purchase anymore is pants. Why? Because pants manufacturers lie about size. I have to try them on. Everything else? Internet. Works great for my shut-in lifestyle as well.

Might I recommend to female-bodied people here to drop the whole jeans fascination? If not for my parents forcing me, I never would've owned a single pair of jeans in my life. Women's jeans, men's jeans...they all suck. Khakis are great, comfortable, just as easy to match (if not easier), and you won't look like literally everyone else walking around in jeans :) If you're not an assassin, corduroys are fun too.

I'm kind of surprised to hear all the dislike of women's clothing here. I find it comes in far greater stylistic variety and colors and patterns than anything in the men's section. I knew I was having a problem when the color of all my shirts started to get duller and duller. How many "cloudburst-grey" shirts can you have? For once in my life, my short height is actually worthwhile and I can get away with generally mid-sized women's clothing.

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I shop in either section without really noticing, and I also don't notice if anyone gives me strange looks for being in the male sections. :o Although it's hard to actually find anything that isn't ginormous on me, since I'm only 5'1". D:

I grew up wearing mostly gender-neutral attire, and I liked it that way, but I also like that now I feel comfortable shopping in either extreme end of the gender spectrum. :3

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I've always preferred male clothing. I've been wearing men's shoes since I was 12. I used to only wear t shirts because I hated the stuff for girls. All see through and frilly. Mom didn't like it so I started wearing polo shirts and striped shirts from the boys side. I have short arms so unless I want to become a seamstress or pay someone to alter my shirts for the rest of my life, I always have short sleeve. But they don't make modest short sleeve shirt for women. They make stuff that is see through, so low that you're force to wear something underneath or with no sleeves at all.

Apparently stores only want females to layer their clothing and that's so impractical to me. I'm not trying to look cool. I just want simplicity and some modesty. The only shirts I like are plaid shirts (male or female, i don't care). They button up, have adjustable and pin able sleeves, and I like the collar. As far as pants go, I love that male pants actually have pockets. They are too baggy for me tho. I used to wear them but I hated the way the crotch was so low, but I like the baggy legs. So I just wear female ones, choosing comfort over pockets.

Ugh tho. I'm really worried, professionally. I'm going to need more professional clothing soon but I haven't found anything that I could wear.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Comrade Eden
\My style of dress is very flow-y and elegant, If I chose a few words to describe my clothing goals they would be anime, stereotypical old russian woman, librarian, and royalty.

anime / old russian woman / librarian / royalty. I don't know how these fit together but I'm very impressed.

I think Anastasia's grandmother, from the movie Anastasia, gets three out of four: Old Russian woman, royalty, animated. (I realize anime and animation are not exactly the same, but still)

the-dowager-empress-marie-profile.jpg

Indeed very impressive :)

Sure. Add glasses and a long coat worn over the shoulders (without arms in the sleeves), and that's a pretty good reference point.

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thegreatwolf

Same here and I agree on the faults of women's clothes shirts especially besides the colors and look most have glitter and I hate glitter it gets all over the place and its just annoying not to mention men's shirts flow better and have in the case of graphic t-shirts have pretty cool images on them especially a lot of the animal shirts pants same case less tight fitting. As far as trouble don't really get much trouble thankfully.

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Can't say I've ever had any problems. Mostly because I don't shop much anyway (hate shopping) and last time I binged was Christmas, so I guess everyone could have assumed I was buying Christmas presents.

Other option is because I hate shopping, I walk very quickly and with a scowl on my face. I have a fairly unfriendly demeanour at the best of times, so when I'm shopping, salespeople don't try and talk to me, never mind point me in the 'right' direction.

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Same here and I agree on the faults of women's clothes shirts especially besides the colors and look most have glitter and I hate glitter it gets all over the place and its just annoying not to mention men's shirts flow better and have in the case of graphic t-shirts have pretty cool images on them especially a lot of the animal shirts pants same case less tight fitting. As far as trouble don't really get much trouble thankfully.

Same here!! The glitter kinda grosses me out. Studs too (studs seem flashy to me). Or the floral prints.. I don't like prints unless it's plaid. Or T-shirts. But I don't like the female shirts with quotes, or Lady Gaga faces on it, or floral or poka dots. Give me plaid (dark plaids), plain, or very subtle texture shirt and I'm good. But anything see through or where I must layer shirts underneath, I won't even consider.

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thegreatwolf

Forgot about those colored studs and yeah see through shirts are annoying too.

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I have the same problem!

I was buying men's jeans a month or two ago, and i was trying to get help from the staff to figure out sizing, and they would not help me. They said "oh women's jeans don't have pockets" and i was like I know, that's why im asking about the men's clothing, and they brushed me off. My mom also tried to get me to wear a dress to prom but even she knew that was a long shot.

I find that if you pretend to be sweet and energetic (the opposite of how I actually am) to the point of confusion or annoyance they might help. Don't let them phase you and put on a likeable persona and they seem to stunned to not comply to your requests or to harass you.

Manipulation at it's finest.

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As a girl with Asperger's, the Men's section is the FUCKING BOMB. Best clothes you will find are there, or in the gender neutral ones. Okay, I do have one dress in my wardrobe but that's only because it's a fucking awesome color and specifically for special events where my style isn't welcome, so I picked the best dress I could that would not be a pain in the ass. All other clothes I own are men's or neutral. The only thing I can complain about is the groin area isn't particularly comfortable - many a time people have made jokes about me having a dick but we'll always get dicks making jokes about dicks... I really want to be androgynous but BOOBS CAN YOU NOT!? They are so fucking annoying. I love the Men's design as well. None of this "Believe your dreams, my little bunny princess" bullshit. Quality, sensible, comfortable clothing. That's what it should be.

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  • 4 weeks later...
Petticoats and cuddles

As a bigender person, i like both male and female clothes, but due to me being he little baby girl of the family I mostly wear frilly girly stuff. The only male clothes I have is due to the starwars or pacman stuff on the front. When I move out Im definately going to get guys clothes.

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AsexuallyME

This entire thread just makes me wish that I could be more like THIS:

pretty-woman-shopping-scene-1.jpg

tumblr_njs9c4nzrh1soax7po1_500.gif?w=565

Anyway, It's mostly my family that acts like that, not actual salespeople. It's like, I *think* I know what I prefer to wear better than you or anybody else does... :mad:

Sorry I didn't add much to the convo, I just couldn't get that scene out of my head... :redface: :cake:

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I can certainly relate to many of the clothing issues in this thread. I love the women's Levi jeans. I need pockets so I took my jeans to a tailor and had him make me deep front pockets. I don't carry a purse, too much trouble, so I carry what I need in my pockets. I agree most women's cothing are ugly, too low cut, and horrendous colors. A lot of the cothing are geared for young twenty something's, which I am not. I did not realize that there are a lot of young twenty something's who dislike the cothing as well. I don't feel so bad now when I acually wear my cargo shorts during the summer. That's about the only type of gender neutral clothing I have.

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eeriesilence

I used to exclusively shop in the male sections of stores as a (pre-)teenager - just so I could "negate" my feminine features. I got a lot of nasty comments - while in the stores and walking around in such clothes. "Fag" was the most common of them all. I would get so embarrassed by what others said that I ended up switching to online shopping.

I've thus changed - and my wardrobe as well. Most days it looks like a Forever 21 catalogue threw up on me (which wouldn't be too far from the truth...) buuuut~ the past few months have really changed me. I've been falling back into old habits and ideas of comfortability and have taken to more "gender neutral" looks. I'm pretty sure I'm agender - or at least nonbinary - I don't feel particularly much of any gender at all, and don't have any preferences. - I often let the judgements of others affect how I viewed myself/presented myself. I'm not really finding the time to care anymore.

With that said~ I've been swayed over again. I'm finding that it's MUCH easier to go into the men's department and try on new things. I'll get a few second glances but it is NOTHING compared to how it was almost a decade ago. Maybe society has become a bit more accepting? Or maybe it's all about the confidence I exude now? Eh. Whatevs.

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I increasingly can't stand anything I find in the women's section. From my point of view, it just seems to be getting worse and worse. The pants don't have useful pockets, and I refuse to wear pants without pockets that I can fit my wallet, keys, knife, and phone (if necessary -- I often leave the darned thing at home) in. If I cannot do that, they are silly pants, and I will not wear them. I also prefer my pants to have thick, sturdy material, because otherwise they rip a lot and then I have to replace them and I dislike shopping in general. Sturdy jeans and cargo pants are about the only pants I've any interest in. I have an aversion to pink and pastel colours, I don't like the women's cuts of shirts, the people who make women's shirts apparently don't believe in arm muscles, and it's all very annoying.

So I started buying as much stuff as possible from the men's section. I avoid the boy's section unless necessary, because kid's clothing in general tends to be less sturdily made (although sometimes, at my height, it's the only option). Luckily for me, I'm built such that men's clothing (assuming I can find it small enough) actually tends to fit better than women's, so it's all in all a good solution for me... except when it comes to shoes and gloves. I have small enough hands and feet that I have a hard time finding any of those at all that fit, which is especially a problem when I'm looking for things like gloves sturdy enough to take hits while sparring or gloves heat-resistant enough to handle hot stage lights. Military surplus stores work well for me, too, since they at least stock practical things in every size that they have, and some branches will take people my size, so there are sometimes boots and sweaters and such available.

I wish that all manufacturers would just make the full range of sizes and colours with sizes that made sense and then put them in a 'clothes' section, or if it must be further sectioned, section it by things like 'pants' or 'shirts'. The thing that annoys me the most is if there's something that I want that comes in both men's and women's sizes, but the men's sizes are far too big and the women's sizes come only in awful pastel colours (this happens the most often for shoes). Also, some catelogues seem to be phasing out size smalls, which is baffling and annoying but probably an entirely separate issue.

I haven't had any problem with the people in the store looking at me funny, either while I'm buying from the men's section, trying clothes on, or looking -- but that might be because I tend to refuse to interact with the sales people more than necessary? I don't know. I just walk in, go where I want, get what I want, and go.


Other option is because I hate shopping, I walk very quickly and with a scowl on my face. I have a fairly unfriendly demeanour at the best of times, so when I'm shopping, salespeople don't try and talk to me, never mind point me in the 'right' direction.

... Or it could be that. It's probably that. I know I do that whenever I have to be around large groups of people I don't know.

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Let it be known that I feel like the topic name should be "AFAB people" instead of female bodied people. I mean, I fall under AFAB but female bodied doesn't fit me because I don't really feel "female"? I feel like a lot of trans people might be excluded from the conversation too.

ANYWAY. I wear skinny jeans and t-shirts. I used to try to dress typically "feminine" but I always felt more like I was in a costume than anything. I buy a lot of shirts and tops from the mens section of the store and jeans from the women's section. Although it can be tricky because I had a large chest and most of the style of shirts I like aren't made for people while my build.

I've had a few people who work in the stores ask if I am lost. However I think a lot of the time people might assume that I am buying for a partner? I usually just get odd looks or completely ignored. *shrug*

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DigitalBookDust

I am AFAB and wear gender-neutral clothing, generally purchased online. I don't really care for jeans but prefer military fatigues or chinos. I'll buy from the boys, men's, junior's, or women's dept. It all depends on fit and price. I dress both for comfort and style. My favorite color is olive green. My favorite fit is "slouchy". I don't wear skinny jeans. In my job, I've got to be able to move freely, and I hate tight clothes. (I'm a librarian and constantly climbing shelves.) I've no problem shopping in male depts in person, though, and freely stating it's for myself. I've been told I dress like a hipster.

Re: glasses. There's an independent optician in town who carries an awesome selection of glasses. I've found a pair that will do quite nicely for a librarian and even have a quirly nosepiece. They're by Guess and round wire-rim.

I even use a gender-neutral cologne purchased from Hove Parfumeur.

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Amoeba-Proteus

I've always shopped in the men's section. I don't like tight clothes, I have more masculine proportions, I don't like my chest falling out of my shirt, I don't like those tiny excuses for "sleeves", and I don't like my material see-through. So the men's section felt like a given.

I generally like the look of a lot of men's clothing too. I'm quite fond of men's jackets and suits...

I don't think I've ever had anyone make remarks, besides one suggesting "we have similar styles in women's" at a shoe place, and when it comes to shopping for undergarments. Same deal: I don't like the look and feel of women's shoes, and they normally don't fit at all. I have large feet compared to your average bio-female, that are also wider. Men's shoes don't feel like they're crushing my feet. And half the time they didn't carry my shoe size in women's.
As for undergarments... I'll just say I checked out a new er... "non-slutty undergarment?" store I noticed arrived in a plaza about a year ago, because it looked like a good place to find the kind of boxers I like. I was kinda confused by the layout so I asked the cashier. The LOOK on her face, was rich. She then tried to show me women's boyshorts. Got another rich facial expression when I told her: "Those are too short... I need some length." :P

I got some weird looks when I was shopping for rashguards in the boy's section once too. Not sure if it was because I'm an adult, if it's because I'm not bio-male, or a combination of both. But hey! I'm a small individual... A large boy's rashguard is $10-$20 less than a men's small! :D

That's really it. I've never had any serious problems.

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TheStarrySkai

I guess I'll join in.

I am a short person so.... I tend to have to buy small or extra small. I don't mind and I rather like loose clothes, but there is a limit to how loose something can be before you look weird. For pants I had to trim the legs a bit... but it turned out great.

I am a size 6 in mens. Bit annoying to find, but oh well.

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