The Maple Leaf Forever Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I'm starved for hugs, kisses and cuddles! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
bonny Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 Hugs are a confusing thing for me. I feel I would like to be getting more hugs than I do, but I would need to be really comfortable with someone's personality before I'd enjoy having them hugging me. An additional problem I have is that I'm scared of offending people by wanting to hug them when they'd prefer not to hug me...which means that I hardly ever initiate hugs (the only time I would do it would be if I felt it was the thing to do to comfort someone who was upset/unhappy)...and I end up accepting hugs from people who initiate, who I don't necessarily really want to hug me, and I never get to hug the people I'd really like to because I'm too afraid. As for kissing...I haven't kissed anyone except my parents for over 15 years, apart from social air-kisses I suppose which I don't really understand at all. I don't really know if I'd want to kiss anyone romantically any more. It's hard to remember but I don't think it ever did much for me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Prisma Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I'm fine with hugs, sometimes I even want them. However, I hate kisses. It's wet and disgusting. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Purnkin Spurce Posted February 2, 2015 Share Posted February 2, 2015 I feel pretty great about hugs, depending on the people I'm giving them to, or who are giving me hugs. Also depends on types of kisses. Pecs on the cheek are fine with me. Sloppy suck faced kisses with lots of noise really do make me wanna hurl. I really don't like the idea of swapping spit with someone. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
cheetahspade Posted February 3, 2015 Share Posted February 3, 2015 It really depends on the person. If it were a relative, I'd never initiate a hug, but, I will accept one so I don't hurt their feelings. I generally don't like hugs, it just feels really weird to me. And I'd never kiss someone unless I knew them really well. Only pecks on the cheek, no way for anything else. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
RileyNoLikey Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 Personally I really like hugs and quick kisses (ya know, the kisses that are clearly not intended to be anything other than a nonsexual way to achieve closeness).I'm a pretty tactile person; hugs, kisses, holding hand, cuddling, etc so I guess that is not a strange thing. (I like holding my best friend's hand and cuddling with her since she is also a very big on physical shows of affection, even if it is platonic affection). I know not liking hugs and kisses is not an ace or aro exclusive thing. I've known plenty of sexual and romantic people that just did not dig that kind of show of affection. Just another thing everyone either likes or doesn't, and it's not really that big of a deal either way. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
CharmVif3075 Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 I've never kissed someone (I'm 20) so no idea if I'd like it but I don't necessarily want to. However, I love hugs, I find them so reassuring. To me, hugs are like "nothing bad can happen to you, I'm here" idk I find that cute. I'd hug my close friends and my sister, etc. a lot. And once, my crush hugged me and I thought I was going to die haha. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
EmotionalAndroid Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 I really do not like kissing. The whole concept is disgusting to me. I've never been kissed on the mouth (thank goodness) but always hate being kissed on the cheek by relatives. I've never been hugged by anyone but family and my elderly neighbors. It's alright, and I can imagine it being pleasant between friends and the like. I do hug my mom and my sister a lot, and I like it. At an Ace meeting I went to, they said they always ended meetings with hugs, and I had to decline. Physical touch with people I don't know very well is really uncomfortable to me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mikasa Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 I don't mind hugs, but I'm not really a fan of kisses. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Bronte Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 I'm a demi-kisser, grey-hugger. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
HellaAce Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 This question threw me for a loop beause I had never really thought about how I really felt about hugs and kisses. I mean, I'm fine with them from my parents and a few relatives/close friends. But the few times that I have hugged someone I've known for awhile but was not that comfortable with it was really awkward. And now that I'm thinking about it, I don't really like hugs. I mean, I like the idea of hugs, and from some people I do like hugs. But from people I'm not that close with, even if I've known them my whole life, I don't like them at all. The same principle applies with kissing, I mean, I haven't kissed that many people in the romantic way, but the times I have I didn't enjoy it. I'm almost positive it was because of that specific partner, and if I kissed someone I felt for more strongly I would (probably) like it. Then again, I'm demiromantic, so how I feel about hugging/kissing/cuddling all depends on the person I'm with. But in general, no I do not enjoy these activities. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
whybobby Posted February 5, 2015 Share Posted February 5, 2015 I've been kissed only once in my life, and absolutely hated it. Maybe because it was a boy who I cared about and it broke my heart when I learned that he did that because of a deal with his friends (they bet "he wouldn't have the guts" to do it). It was disgusting and I never wanted to go through it again with anyone else - ever. I blamed the situation for my lack of interest in dating or kissing or whatever felt more intimate, but then I realized it was just an excuse for my asexuality. I just don't think about that day anymore and, when I do, it doesn't feel as bad as it did at the time - YEARS ago. However, I still feel uncomfortable about kissing, I avoid all opportunities because I really don't want to kiss anyone. I'm aversed (maybe even repulsed) by the idea. Now, about hugging - I don't know how I feel about it. I don't get many hugs (no, really, people hug me on my birthday and that's it), so I sometimes get to the point of dreaming that people would give me a long hug and it would feel so good I wake up desperately wanting to be hugged. On the other hand, every time my sister tries to hug me, I'm immediately repulsed by it and don't want to reciprocate at all. I love my sister but I just don't know why I can't comfortably hug her. I guess hugging for me is more like my idea of "platonic romance". When I "crush" on someone, I just really want to hug them for a long time and that's about it. I'm weird. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sulhythal Posted February 5, 2015 Share Posted February 5, 2015 I'm kind of mixed. I am shy of physical contact, but I want and like hugs. Just...I have to know you first? Kissing...unless it's family or children, and preferably both, no thank you. (Nothing is cuter than a toddler/baby who's learned how to kiss for the first time and decides to Kiss All the People!" Never turn down one of those!) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WhenSummersGone Posted February 5, 2015 Share Posted February 5, 2015 Depends on my mood and how close I am to someone. I prefer to just hug my family or friends but I can do both and cuddling with romantic partners. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
tiptoenail Posted February 5, 2015 Share Posted February 5, 2015 I hate kisses with people slobbering all over you. Hugs on the other hand I don’t mind if they don’t last to long, but when people hang on to you to longer then say more then 30 seconds it bugs the hell out of me or when people grab you from behind to hug you, I hate that to. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Asex Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I post this on behalf of species that can't use a computer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvXMVDOhgJ4 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
MichelleN Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 Love hugs! I hug my friends all the time! I've never hugged someone I am romantic with, yet...do I am not sure how I feel about that. I was with a guy for a short period and even holding his hand made me uncomfortable. So I enjoy hugging friends but possibly not potential romantic partners? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mäolenmerirosvo Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 I dont like people outside of very very close friends and family touching me, if someone even brushes their fingers against mine when holding out paper i shift my hand automatically away. So its pretty clear that i dont like hugs and kisses. Only person i can stand intiating contact with me is my mom, otherwise it must make the gesture. If im in pain i love cuddling and having someone run their hand trought my hair, but again the only one who i let do that is my mom. I have only kissed person twice, both times on cheeck. I think ist disgusting to kiss on mouth because of saliva and stuff. I didnt like kissing and i stiffen up and become really akward if someone hugs me. I can shake hands but that is pretty much it. It takes someone i really trust for me to be okay with them touching me, but when all standards are met i love cuddling. Not really hugging and kissing thought. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TeddyMiller Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I used to be uncomfortable with hugging, but taking Lexapro for anxiety changed that; now I like hugs. And I like kissing hello/goodbye as a sign of affection, but I don't know how I'd feel about more sustained making out or French kissing. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
rach123 Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I'm scared of them Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DiEvAl Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I love hugs. As for kisses... more experimental data required. ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mioav Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I'm completely fine with hugs with people I know and feel close to, I get a little creeped out if strangers or people I'm not... intune with hug me, not to the extent I run off and cry in a corner but enough that I still need a breather. Kissing is off my books completely. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
soMeRandoM670 Posted April 23, 2015 Share Posted April 23, 2015 I am hyper sensual/affectionate male. I love hugs & cuddles!I would hug everyone if they let me HAha.But yeah I am not really big on kissing in romantic way.It multiple reasons one of them1) tone of what people think it usually leads too and pressure associated with it.2) I haven't kissed that often and don't know how get better because3) If I do try kiss they get wrong Idea. But yes, I don't deny how I am as affectionate male I do also joke about, bedroom & cuddles.Be that bedroom usually considered something of sexual contact. I openly tell them how I am cuddly, then immediately say about my view on bedroom & say it's great, cuddles that is xD!I can kiss people affectionately men & women. Women does happen way more often, and usually it's just gay men. #NoHomoRomance ^.^just why should I deny people chance joy and pleasure of affection and sensuality just because of there gender or sex?When I am like this haha.This does cause some problems lol xD, always if I do cuddle in bed. or even just anywhere private. Women, if they are attracted to me. It's hard, xD! A lot conflicting feelings, but that doesn't deter me Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ElectricMongoose Posted April 24, 2015 Share Posted April 24, 2015 Hugs are good! Kisses, are ok (needs to be a strong bonded person I feel trust with) Cuddles are the same thing with me as kisses. :P if there's such thing as Demiromantic I'd probably fall under that category. I need my strong bonds and platonic friendships first before I feel comfortable with anything touchy-feely. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Holy Ghost Posted April 24, 2015 Share Posted April 24, 2015 kissing seems like a casual thing to me. hugging people means a lot more to me Quote Link to post Share on other sites
CNGB Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 I LOVE HUGS And I don't mind kisses too much, but not on the lips. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tanzanite Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 I haven't been kissed on the lips, but I tend to find getting kissed on the cheek annoying. As for hugs...when I was about 10 years old, I thought I like them, but in the end, I felt nothing. I'm sure the person giving me the hug feels something, but I don't. It's like I can't tell the difference between a parent's hug and a stranger's hug. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mezzo Forte Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 While I don't tend to initiate physical contact, I'm pretty chill about accepting it. (I'm very awkward trying to initiate hugs though since I guess I never picked up on the social protocol behind it.) I came from a very tactile family, so I never really learned to associate touch with romance or sex. We even exchange massages casually, which is wonderful for getting rid of tension. I have also made friends with my fair share of people from outside the US, (I can think of friends in Austria, Ecuador, Columbia, Mexico, Brazil, China, India, Indonesia, Slovenia, Chile, and Ghana just off the top of my head, all of whom I befriended in person,) and some of them come from cultures where a friendly greeting involves one or two kisses on the cheek, and beyond the initial culture shock, I never really minded it because of the context. I guess I am more affected by the intent than the physical contact itself. I do enjoy hugs though. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
A Place With A Tree Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 Im not really into physical shows of affection. Kisses on the cheek, forehead and my hair are okay but only by my mother. If someone of my really close friends would try to kiss me on the cheek or something i would either freeze or flinch away. I have kissed people on the mouth few times and it was gross. If person i dont know really well (like classmate) tried to kiss me i would most likely punch them. Hugging.. Im the most akward person to hug ever! I freeze and stiffen up, i just stand there until the other person lets go. I never try to hug anyone, i do it only when im asked to (i dont want to hurt their feelings if i care about them) or im taken by suprise (if i dont know them, i would just push them away). There is one thing i like to do tough! Platonic cuddling on couch. I usually just lay my head on someones lap (my mom or bff) and watch tv. If im in pain i love having my hair petted when leaning my head on their shoulder/lap. Otherwise, its a big no no for me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
DigitalBookDust Posted April 25, 2015 Share Posted April 25, 2015 I don't care for either. While I will, if FORCED to do so, exchange a chaste hug, my friends know not to initiate casual touch with me. I don't like it. Physical affection is not part of my repertoire. I will give you all the verbal reinforcement in my capacity, but don't ask me to physically reassure you. I cringe from it. Even as a child, this was so. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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