I don't like to be receive but like to give?

[kitesho!]

I find that I do not need like sexual attention but do find that I want my partners to feel pleasure and be satisfied? So I am confused?

Can one not want sex and like giving pleasure?

So i am in a relationship with a girl that I love giving pleasure too and going downtown on... But I don't want to be touched. I know weird? I lie the time we spend but when initmate I go to town for her but I have no need to be taken care of or desire. I like her and it could be more but she does not understand my condition?

[The Great WTF]

I am moving this thread to the Gray Area.

The Great WTF
Asexual Relationships Moderator

[Feral_Sophisticate]

I find that I do not need like sexual attention but do find that I want my partners to feel pleasure and be satisfied? So I am confused?

Can one not want sex and like giving pleasure?

This sort of thing is absolutely possible. I'm not asexual, and I'm happy to not have sex with my demi girl - but I enjoy giving her pleasure, as she does enjoy doing the same for me.

However, we're also kinky, and that's probably a factor, as what we do is often far hotter to both of us than sex (in all its varieties) can be.

[kitesho!]

I would just like clarification?

[Feral_Sophisticate]

I would just like clarification?

On what, exactly? What you like is what you like.

For what it's worth, I see nothing wrong with wanting to please your partner, but not necessarily wanting (or expecting) reciprocity. I also know I'm not the only sexual one out there who feels that way. We do exist.

[WolfySnarl]

Heehee, I totally get you on this one! I pretty much don't get any kind of physical pleasure, unless we're doing only mildly intimate things, but I do get emotional pleasure from making another person feel good, and just being close.

I wonder if there would be a tactful way to bring this up to a partner...haha. Maybe just saying what you titled this post, "I love to give, but not to get."

[Robin L]

Merged "Love Giving hate Getting?" from the same poster and forum into this thread, and merged the OPs.
Robin L, Moderator

[bare_trees]

That's totally normal to me. Sometimes you get nothing out of receiving it, but are happy to see someone else you care about satisfied.

[kitesho!]

Thank you for all feedback. The girl I was in a relationship with ended things. She could not reconcile my pleasure in giving pleasure and not needed any reciprocating sexual favor. Honestly I loved oral and other giving pleasure but for me I did not need any stimulation. It's hard to explain but past experiences and personality I do not need those stimuli. But I do enjoy my partner being satisfied immensely. I find as I get older I need to accept being alone as most equate relationships as mostly physical. I believe I have more to offer but in all honesty most people I encounter in the dating world us physical and or sexual in basis.