Kitteridge Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Offer him some berry pie and tea. Make small talk for a few hours, then promise to get together for lunch sometime. My socks are too itchy. Link to post Share on other sites
LaMaestra Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Scratch them! I have difficulty swallowing pills. Link to post Share on other sites
Wayfarer Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Swallow them while hanging upside down. I don't have enough hours in the day. Link to post Share on other sites
(A)rrogant Avian Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Bribe the sun. I forgot how to sleep. Link to post Share on other sites
Kitteridge Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Here, borrow my hammer. My floor needs to be swept, but I don't feel like doing it right now. Link to post Share on other sites
LaMaestra Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Get someone else to do it for you. My team aren't doing as well as they should. Link to post Share on other sites
Skippy Squirrel Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Oh this one's easy. Just turn the opposing team into fleas. Harmless little fleas. Then put all those fleas in a box, and then put that box inside of another box, and then mail that box to yourself. And when it arrives? A HA HA HA! Smash it with a hammer! I'm having trouble coming up with a good backstory for this superhero I made up. Link to post Share on other sites
RaptorAttacks Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Use a generator! (Pretty vulgar language, beware.) I've got a super sore jaw from surgery, but I'm craving chicken and waffles.... Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted January 10, 2015 Share Posted January 10, 2015 Put them through the blender, they will still taste the same I want a coffee, but it is too close to bedtime Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 11, 2015 Author Share Posted January 11, 2015 Turn all your clocks back five hours. My ceiling is too low. Link to post Share on other sites
Kitteridge Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Lower your floor by 20 feet and you'll have a nice lofty ceiling. I have a headache. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 11, 2015 Author Share Posted January 11, 2015 Drop an anvil on you foot. It won't cure your headache, but it will take your mind off it I can't stay awake long enough to do my homework Link to post Share on other sites
Wayfarer Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Throw ice-cold water in your face. I have a writer's block Link to post Share on other sites
Badgerclaws Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Chisel it into a work of art. I'm allergic to human touch. Link to post Share on other sites
Skippy Squirrel Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Snuggle with a dozen bunnies. I cannot focus on anything right now. Link to post Share on other sites
The Strong Force Posted January 11, 2015 Share Posted January 11, 2015 Keep thinking about it and eventually you will be focusing on your inability to focus The Cake is a lie Link to post Share on other sites
RhuinHruda Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Just accept that all lies are just an alternate version of reality that you can see and hear but not access and won't bother you. My problem is that my cat is really needy. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 12, 2015 Author Share Posted January 12, 2015 get a cardboard cut-out of yourself, the cat will bother it instead I hate climbing hills Link to post Share on other sites
Badgerclaws Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Walk on your hands so it's like you're moving downhill instead. I wanted a pony for Christmas, but I didn't get one. Link to post Share on other sites
Kitteridge Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Get yourself fake ears, a mane, and a tail. Why get a pony when you can BE one instead? I want to go camping, but have no one to join me. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 12, 2015 Author Share Posted January 12, 2015 Take a full length mirror with you, then you won't be alone because there will be someone else there just like you I tried to count the stars, but I kept losing my place Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Photograph the sky then you can count the ones on the pictures and mark them off as you do so I've just missed the last train home Link to post Share on other sites
Kitteridge Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Take out your trusty pogo stick and bounce your way home! I need bread but don't feel like walking to the grocery store. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 12, 2015 Author Share Posted January 12, 2015 A simple summoning charm is all you need. My rubbish bin smells bad Link to post Share on other sites
Kitteridge Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Plug up your nose til the smell goes away. I seem to have a splinter in my finger. Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 12, 2015 Author Share Posted January 12, 2015 I'm sorry but amputation is the only option :p My hot air balloon won't fly :( Link to post Share on other sites
Skycaptain Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Release the rope that's anchoring it to the ground!! A heron has built a nest which has blocked my chimney Link to post Share on other sites
Wayfarer Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Smoke it out, with a bit of luck it will just fly away. I didn't get enough sleep last night Link to post Share on other sites
Ace-TheTimelordsCompanion Posted January 12, 2015 Author Share Posted January 12, 2015 Sleep at work (or school, or the local supermarket), curl up under your desk(or in your locker, or under a pile of tinned apricots) and no one will notice. My skirt is yellow Link to post Share on other sites
Wayfarer Posted January 12, 2015 Share Posted January 12, 2015 Upend your ink bottle over it in artistic fashion: now it's yellow and blue! :D I don't want to walk over to the kitchen to fetch a new cup of tea Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.