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Grey-A and Chronically Ill


musiclover3261

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musiclover3261

Hey everyone,

So I'm pretty new to the community (less than 6 months) but I'm pretty sure I'm somewhere on the ace spectrum since I experience sexual attraction rarely but i never feel the desire/need to act on those emotions. I'm also pretty sex-repulsed - i don't mind talking about sex when it revolves around other people (to a certain extent) but imagining myself doing anything beyond cuddling/making out is just really foreign and disgusting.

I'm confused because I also have had fibromyalgia since I was 15 (I'm 21 now) and have been taking a ton of meds to control the pain. One of those is Prozac, which the doctors tell me helps the pain because of increased serotonin (although now i'm starting to think i'm depressed also, but that's a different story...). I've been taking Prozac for about four years and so basically I'm confused if my lack of sex drive/sexual attraction is related to side effects of the meds or actually being asexual.

HELP!!

Thanks so much,

Danielle

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Welcome musiclover! I am also chronically ill, grey-ace/demi, and sex-repulsed. And like you, I am also on an antidepressant like prozac. I actually took prozac at one time, but my body became too used to it for it to work anymore, so I had to switch to celexa. The only thing I noticed when taking prozac was that it only killed my libido (celexa has the same effect). It did not effect my asexuality, I've never been sexually attracted to anyone really other than long-term boyfriends. Sex drive and sexual attraction are two different things, but tend to go together. Aces can have a libido/sex drive without sexual attraction. It's mainly the lack of sexual attraction that makes us asexual. So if you've never been sexually attracted to anyone (except for long term partners than you are well connected with), it is unlikely that the medication is causing that.

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Guest fernweh

I've been on several different antidepressants-- Prozac included-- since I was about 15 (I'm 23) and also, from around 17-18 I was unmedicated.

Long story short: there was no noteworthy change from one phase to another. Antidepressants or not, I've just never had a "normal" sex drive. But obviously, everything affects every patient in different ways, so I won't act like an authority on your situation! Like Lady said before me, though, if your sex drive has been the same before and after, it's very probably not the drug. If the not knowing bothers you, though, I'd suggest bringing it up with your doctor? Maybe you could see about trying a different prescription that would get you the serotonin you need.

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musiclover3261

Thanks guys, this was really helpful! Looking forward to speaking with you more in the future :D

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Hey musiclover -

I've always had fibro since I was 15 (now 24). And I'm also on a ton of meds, including two antidepressants. It was hard for me to really find my sexual identity. As a teen and into my early 20s, I never experienced sexual attraction (for men or women). I blamed the antidepressants and continued to try to "make" myself "normal." Needless to say, that didn't get me very far. I've now come to realize that, while antidepressants (and fibromyalgia, itself) might have led to a diminished/non-existent libido, they aren't what has shaped my sexual attraction, or lack thereof. I now identify as homoromantic demisexual, because I can experience sexual attraction, but only after I've formed an emotional connection - and only with females. A large part of determining my identity has been becoming okay with who I am and that I am not normal. I hope that this helps. Let me know if you ever wanna talk about fibro or asexuality or the weather or whatever else, haha.

<3 megan

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