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So this thing happened...


Kitty Incognito

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Kitty Incognito

I was chatting with a coworker and she mentioned someone that I wasn't sure if I had ever met. I said "His name sounds familiar... does he work in XYZ department?" and she said "Yes. You'd remember him, he's the really hot one there!" and I was completely stumped. Then she showed me a picture and I was like "Oh yeah, I've met him" and she said "He's hot, right?" and I said "um... yeah, sure!" He was muscular and I guess aesthetically attractive, but describing him as "the hot one" really didn't help me to picture him because I don't see physical "hotness".

Funny how people use descriptions like that and just assume that everyone will know what they mean.

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He was muscular and I guess aesthetically attractive, but describing him as "the hot one" really didn't help me to picture him because I don't see physical "hotness".

Funny how people use descriptions like that and just assume that everyone will know what they mean.

But you did know what she meant. You just said that you recognize that he is muscular and attractive.

THAT'S WHAT HOT MEANS.

I find lots of weird people attractive, but i would never refer to someone who looks like Frances McDormand as "the hot one" because, even though I totally think she's hot, I know no one would know what I meant. I would, however, refer to someone who looked like Jessica Simpson as "the hot one" even though I don't personally think she's hot because I know that people would understand who I was referencing.

No one actually cares who you think is attractive... it's about cultural communication.

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WhenSummersGone

I have the same problem. I rarely find people hot so if someone said "he's the hot one" I would have to ask for a name or have them describe him to me. If everyone has a different view on who they find hot then I don't see how that would help lol. It would be like telling the police some man who stole something was hot and leaving out other details.

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Kitty Incognito

He was muscular and I guess aesthetically attractive, but describing him as "the hot one" really didn't help me to picture him because I don't see physical "hotness".

Funny how people use descriptions like that and just assume that everyone will know what they mean.

But you did know what she meant. You just said that you recognize that he is muscular and attractive.

THAT'S WHAT HOT MEANS.

I find lots of weird people attractive, but i would never refer to someone who looks like Frances McDormand as "the hot one" because, even though I totally think she's hot, I know no one would know what I meant. I would, however, refer to someone who looked like Jessica Simpson as "the hot one" even though I don't personally think she's hot because I know that people would understand who I was referencing.

No one actually cares who you think is attractive... it's about cultural communication.

That's just it, though. When I look at someone and register in my mind how they look, "hotness" doesn't even factor in so when I try to recall them, that word just isn't attached (kind of like not having the hash-tag to search for an image online). I know muscles and a square jaw is attractive on a man (culturally speaking) and I can recognize that if someone points it out, but that's not what I usually see when I look at someone. It's more like "tall, grey hair, middle-aged guy with medium build and blue eyes". In fact, my coworker DID point out that he was muscular. I didn't even notice when I looked at the picture until she did.

Don't know if that even makes sense :D

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Kitty Incognito

I might be inclined to know who someone meant simply because I feel like I have a pretty good idea of what's commonly thought of as attractive, but I completely get where you're coming from otherwise. I actually do definitely find some people attractive myself, but I find it mostly impossible to have conversations with women about "hot" guys. I rarely relate; it's like looking at refrigerators for me. Actually I don't usually relate to what's stereotypically "hot" for a woman's appearance, either.

Dunno if that says anything about my sexuality, though. A lot of people aren't into typical "hotness" or can find relatively plain or unconventional people really attractive.

I'm with you on finding unconventional people attractive. It's kind of funny, because I'll be like "he's really cute" and my friends all give me weird looks, but for me the physical attraction is secondary. I don't see it until I really get to know them then it's like "oh yeah, you're kinda cute". :D

I have the same problem. I rarely find people hot so if someone said "he's the hot one" I would have to ask for a name or have them describe him to me. If everyone has a different view on who they find hot then I don't see how that would help lol. It would be like telling the police some man who stole something was hot and leaving out other details.

LOL, yes! That's exactly what I'm saying!! (also picturing the poor police writing down the description of the perpetrator :D )

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I agree with all of this!
My idea of "hot" does not match majority of people I know (maybe because mostly cause I think people are just cute/adorable until I get to know them, and then they can become "hot") but I do understand what the general idea of "hot" is among my friends, so when they say "the hot one" I can generally guess which one they mean, and it's not generally the one I find most attractive/cute...

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