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Asexual and Demisexual... Is there an in between?


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WARNING: sorry for the novel :unsure:

Hi! I'm new here. I found out earlier this year about demisexuality and then found out about asexuality. Ever since I found out about it, I did research on both sexualities everyday and follow several blogs of them both on tumblr. So, I consider myself both asexual and demisexual. Now, I know that demi=half, meaning that demisexual is half sexual and asexual; why I consider myself both is because I feel like I'm more than half asexual, but the demisexuality is still (barely) there... if that makes sense.

I feel like I'm about 75%-90% asexual and about 10%-25% demisexual (I'm bad with numbers). So demisexuality is only sexually attracted to someone they share a strong emotional bond with someone. First of all, I'd like to say that I have yet to have that strong emotional bond with someone to experience sexual attraction. However, I do fantasize about having that attraction with someone I care deeply about because it feels right to me. Though, I don't feel like demisexuality completely fits me because I don't necessarily search for someone to share such a strong bond. It's not always on my mind and I don't really feel like I can't wait to spend time with someone and feel the sexual attraction. Also, I feel like it would take an extremely long time for me to feel that way about someone... I'm talking about years (emphasis on the plural).

Maybe that's because I'm grey-heteroromantic and I just rarely feel that romantic attraction to someone and it kind of makes demisexuality confusing to me. I just want to know if one can be both asexual and demisexual, and if it's not a thing... can I make it a thing? As you can tell, I put demi-asexual about myself and it sounds right to me.

Oh, and this is kind of an extra question about romantic orientations. I noticed the few times I've been romantically attracted to guys, but not girls... yet I feel like I wouldn't completely shut out the idea of being romantically attracted to a girl. I mean, I would still have it a chance and I'm open to the possibility. I heard of someone being "bi-curious" or "heteroflexible", but those are connected to sexual orientations. Is there anything like that for romantic orientations?

Thanks! ^_^

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Hi there ^_^

Gray-Asexual: only desires partnered sexual activity under certain specific circumstances and/or extremely rarely (ie for you after years of having a close bond)??

And biromantic: romantically attracted to men and women

Or

Panromantic: romantically attracted to people of any gender (ie capable of having a romantic bond with men, women, trans people, agender people, generfluid people etc)

Demiromantic means can only form romantic attraction once a bond has formed (ie friendship), so people can also be Demi-biromantic etc..

Anyway, those are just some random suggestions.

Good luck! :cake:

EDIT: maybe Gray-demisexual could apply in this case! that's not a label I've actually heard before, but I love coming up with new labels and mixing old labels. Hey if they fit better, then I think that's awesome :P

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The halfway between demi and ace is Grey-Asexual.

Its a very flexible type of asexual as it means anyone who experiences sexual attraction rarely or under very specific circumstances.

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Oh that makes sense! I didn't completely understand gray-asexuality and how it's between demi and ace. I misunderstood that rarely experiencing sexual attraction includes some specific circumstances. I'll definitely do more research on it to understand it better.

I thought about the possibility of being biromantic or panromantic, it sounds right, I just have yet to experience being romantically attracted to the same sex/gender, but I wouldn't turn it down or deny it if I do. I probably am demi-romantic, but I just don't feel completely sure. It's like a kinda know, but I'm still questioning it. I mean, I would like to know for sure, but I guess that time would come later and just claim unsure for romantic attraction.

Thank you both for the help! I really appreciate it! ^_^

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Greysexual basically means: sexual attraction under super specific circumstances and/or rarely. Demisexual falls on the grayace scale.

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Calligraphette_Coe

Oh, and this is kind of an extra question about romantic orientations. I noticed the few times I've been romantically attracted to guys, but not girls... yet I feel like I wouldn't completely shut out the idea of being romantically attracted to a girl. I mean, I would still have it a chance and I'm open to the possibility. I heard of someone being "bi-curious" or "heteroflexible", but those are connected to sexual orientations. Is there anything like that for romantic orientations?

Thanks! ^_^

They're called smiles. Sometimes you give them, sometimes someone gives them to you when they think about being with you. It doesn't have to be sexual or romantic. They're like sunrises over cities of crystal pagodas... they fill you with wonder and joy and if you question them too intently, the mirage disappears.

Last time I was there, they were taking a vote to do away with labels. Not sure how that worked out, never heard back. I just hope that next time I'm there, If find they did decide to make them obsolete. So that we call all bask in the music of the spheres....

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Calligraphette_Coe
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They're called smiles. Sometimes you give them, sometimes someone gives them to you when they think about being with you. It doesn't have to be sexual or romantic. They're like sunrises over cities of crystal pagodas... they fill you with wonder and joy and if you question them too intently, the mirage disappears.

This is nice but I'm really not sure what it has to do with helping SnowOwl come to a better understanding of her romantic orientation :o

Oh that makes sense! I didn't completely understand gray-asexuality and how it's between demi and ace. I misunderstood that rarely experiencing sexual attraction includes some specific circumstances. I'll definitely do more research on it to understand it better.

I thought about the possibility of being biromantic or panromantic, it sounds right, I just have yet to experience being romantically attracted to the same sex/gender, but I wouldn't turn it down or deny it if I do. I probably am demi-romantic, but I just don't feel completely sure. It's like a kinda know, but I'm still questioning it. I mean, I would like to know for sure, but I guess that time would come later and just claim unsure for romantic attraction.

Thank you both for the help! I really appreciate it! ^_^

Glad to be of help ^_^ Good luck!! :cake:

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