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Asexuality and Alcohol?


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In general I am figuring out that I fit somewhere on the asexuality scale. (see my welcome post for details!)

I'm a little confused because I find that when I drink, I become flirty and more sexual. I don't drink very often, just in the privacy of my home with my girlfriend and 3-4 drinks max.

Any thoughts on asexuality and alcohol?

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I think some combination of being a vasodilator and a loosening of inhibitions contributes to it.

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Mycroft is Yourcroft

Alcohol doesn't change your orientation. If you identify with the asexual label, then that could well be what you're looking for. :)

Don't worry about the alcohol, being under the influence sometimes just means that you ask yourself 'Why not?' when faced with a situation instead of 'Why?'. :P

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I also avoid alcohol most of the time...two drinks once a month, when I'm out to sing kareoke. I only buy drinks because I feel bad about going to a bar and not getting anything. But once or twice, in small parties with people I know well, I have gotten pretty drunk. Not enough to forget the night, be enough to need to be walked home by some one less drunk...and I live a five minute walk from where the party took place, in a perfectly straight line down a main road. I didn't get any more flirty, though I did get very singy. Alcohol is, as other have mentioned, an inhibition lower-er. If you have any sort of think that you're normally a little embarrassed about, or just don't want people to see you doing, you're more likely to do them when you get a little buzz going and don't remember the embarrassment. But its not going to make you do something totally against your character. Just think less before you speak.

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I only drink when I'm with a group of friends, which isn't often, but when I start I cannot stop, and I start taking my clothes off, which is something I never do sober, I even sleep in a full outfit, but I don't associate nudity with sexuality so who knows why I do stuff.

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I avoid getting drunk now because I used to have a habit of being very, very flirty and touchy and back in my early drinking days I would make out with randoms... Yeah....

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Don't be worried about your self identity by how alcohol changes the you act. It turns gentlemen into scumbags. drinking in moderation is okay, just be careful.

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When I drink sometimes I start to crave tobacco - even though I've never been more than a second-hand smoker. Alcohol does weird things. It makes one hard of hearing (notice how loud drunk people get), and less able to use good judgement. It's also known to make some people want sex or to become extremely romantic. A work friend of mine used to talk about his buddy who fell in love every time he drank. I'm introverted and a little socially anxious, and I find that a drink can help me be more sociable. But too much and I just want to go take a nap.

It's probably best to judge how you are when not drinking to know how you really are.

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Thnaks for the replies everyone.

I'm not concerned with my behavior, I actually think it is a good thing in my relationship (although I don't want to form a bad relationship with alcohol just so I can have better sex with my girlfriend).

It just has me questioning if I truly fit in as an asexual, and if I just have a low sex drive/ depression/ low self esteem.

I don't really care either way, but it would help to eventually know myself a little better.

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When I drink sometimes I start to crave tobacco - even though I've never been more than a second-hand smoker. Alcohol does weird things. It makes one hard of hearing (notice how loud drunk people get), and less able to use good judgement. It's also known to make some people want sex or to become extremely romantic. A work friend of mine used to talk about his buddy who fell in love every time he drank. I'm introverted and a little socially anxious, and I find that a drink can help me be more sociable. But too much and I just want to go take a nap.

It's probably best to judge how you are when not drinking to know how you really are.

Yeah I've seen some people say in threads like this that if you start wanting sex when you're drunk, you must not be asexual.. the argument is that subconsciously you must be sexual or else you would still be asexual when you get drunk.

I disagree with this for multiple reasons (!) But the tobacco and drugs are a pretty big reason. Like I *hate* smoking weed, it actually makes me throw up after I smoke it, tobacco does the same.. tobacco makes me feel so sick that I think I must be allergic to nicotine or something haha. So yeah, I don't touch the stuff with a 10 foot poll sober because of how awful they make me feel.. but when I'm drunk if someone is handing around a joint (weed) or cigarettes, I'll happily puff away and then end up having to throw up in the garden or whatever.. being drunk doesn't stop them making me sick, but it stops me caring that I don't want them, that I don't like them, and that they make me sick, and weirdly somehow makes me think that yeah, it's actually a good idea to smoke them.

So while I've never actually *wanted* sex more when I'm drunk (though being drunk has always made giving sex much easier and also has made me more flirty and sensual) I can see why for some asexuals, being drunk might actually make them think they want sex. That doesn't change the fact that they are asexual, just like me happily smoking crap when drunk doesn't actually make me a smoker haha.. it's just another one of the multiple ways alcohol can fuck one up.

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