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So I'm terrible at Relationships...


PFFFT

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Yep.

I'm terrible at seeing signs.

I'm not even joking once so one tried everything. I mean EVERYTHING, Randomly hugging me, leaning in, leaning on me, looking at me and smiling, a few pecks on the cheek, jumping to help me.....

There's probably even a few more I never even picked on after.

The only reason I really know this is she finally told me that she liked me. Hence why I only noticed she was "Making a move?"

So yea.....

Any tips and advice that someone might be interested? Any clear signs?

P.S. I don't see how dating a sexual would be any different so yea, not that kinda issue.

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. . . I had a freind in highschool who kissed me on the head. I do not know if he was interested in me. I will be of no help. Just, maybe, in this case start listening to sterotypes?

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. . . I had a freind in highschool who kissed me on the head. I do not know if he was interested in me. I will be of no help. Just, maybe, in this case start listening to sterotypes?

Sterotypes? How would that help me?

*Confused*

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If it makes you feel better, I told a friend that I liked someone and asked her if I could practice on her. So I kept saying I loved her and I was stuttering and I even asked her to pretend to my gf so someone would leave me alone a couple times. She didn't realize I liked her until I told her. And that was about 7 or 9 months later.

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. . . I had a freind in highschool who kissed me on the head. I do not know if he was interested in me. I will be of no help. Just, maybe, in this case start listening to sterotypes?

Sterotypes? How would that help me?

*Confused*

Well, if people say "that means they like you", which is steryotyping, just take those things as a standard to judge peoples behaviour towards you against. Sorry, I occasionally forget explanations.

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. . . I had a freind in highschool who kissed me on the head. I do not know if he was interested in me. I will be of no help. Just, maybe, in this case start listening to sterotypes?

Sterotypes? How would that help me?

*Confused*

Well, if people say "that means they like you", which is steryotyping, just take those things as a standard to judge peoples behaviour towards you against. Sorry, I occasionally forget explanations.

Ah that makes more sense I make sure to check these out, thank you.

If it makes you feel better, I told a friend that I liked someone and asked her if I could practice on her. So I kept saying I loved her and I was stuttering and I even asked her to pretend to my gf so someone would leave me alone a couple times. She didn't realize I liked her until I told her. And that was about 7 or 9 months later.

That does make me feel better in fact :) Thank you.

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By the way, are you guys are the Aro scale?

Nope. I have crushes and stuff..... I'm just terrible at picking up signs....

It also may not help I've never really had a relationship.

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Not everyone's dated. I havn't really dated. Besides love's mushy and you know what's also mushy?

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By the way, are you guys are the Aro scale?

i consider myself fully romantic. At the same time, I'm well aware that how I define that is different from the Hollywood ideal. i'm not sure if the Hollywood ideal actually is the norm, though.

. . . I don't want to have to always share a bedroom with my romantic other, if that helps answer your question in anyway. I want to be able to take breaks from the romantic, but still stay with that person. I'm probably too odd for anyone to ever deal with for the rest of their life.

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I found something that helped was going on YouTube and searching for "How to tell he/she is interested in me?" There are a lot of videos that tell you signs to watch for. This is not an ace only problem, gauging from how common that type of video is, lots of sexuals have the same problem.

On a side note, the reason I looked up those types of videos was so I could learn which body language signals to quash so I don't accidentally transmit interest signals. So they are handy for aces who come across accidentally as interested as well.

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Not everyone's dated. I havn't really dated. Besides love's mushy and you know what's also mushy?

...Peas?

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Not everyone's dated. I havn't really dated. Besides love's mushy and you know what's also mushy?

...Peas?

Well, yes. But no. Vomit's mushy. And so is love. I don't wanna fall in lovey dovey vomit.

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I can't really help but I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. I don't do well with signs, romantic-wise. I can pick up other social cues very easily but for some reason I'm totally oblivious on the romantic front. I always have no idea until someone tells me outright that they are interested in me in a romantic way.

What I did was if I liked someone, I just told them. Yes, rejection sucks but I hate dwelling on what ifs.

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I can only sense signs but I cannot know for sure. So basically I cannot really tell.

However, there are plenty of materials on the internet that can teach you about body language. No matter how hard someone tries to avoid or hide they cannot completely hide their interest because body language is a more subconscious "outlet" of what is going on in someone's head.

For example, someone who has their feet pointed at you during a conversation shows interest and attention. If they feet or body is facing/ point towards the door then they want to leave even if they do not say it.

The existence and combinations of various body languages can give you clues on the degree of interest a person has in you.

For example, head titling, neck exposing, hair preening.

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YellowElephant

Hmm. A couple months ago some guy (as in a classmate I've talked to often since he moved here last year) opened the practice room door while my friends and I were messing around with the piano. He asked for a "pre-concert" hug, and I obliged. But instead of hugging everyone else in the practice room like I anticipated, he left. Friendly, I thought.

Now, and a few random hugs later, he's sent me a snapchat saying "you're cute" with the emoji with the tongue that I typically use when telling my friends about that amazingly yummy food. Yep, I feel I may have missed a few signs myself. I entirely empathize with you. :cake:

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(Note: In MMOs, my character appearance generation is done completely by random, so I run a female character half the time. I am fairly agender when online.)

Anyways, I am playing an MMORPG, and I am farming away on my land. Then some guy comes by and starts pushing me around with his tractor, which is very annoying when I am trying to optimally pack my crops. So, I figure, he was a troll or griefer, so ignore him for a while.

Fast forward a week, and he comes buy looking to buy my plot so he can expand his farm. And he starts trying to seduce me. Apparently what I interpreted as griefing was his attempt to start flirting or get my attention or something. As far as I can reckon, it is like the kid on the playground pulling the hair of the girl he likes.

My point being, sexuals can be horrible at relationships too. (Also, I am a bit of an information security expert, so I managed to track down his Google+ account with relative ease. He is a 20-something guy, so not like a 12 year old who is ignorant. He is of an age that he should know better).

I am also sorta curious... Does that approach ever work? Or is he just an idiot?

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I'm told I'm bad at picking up signs.

Except I'm not. I just tend to ignore them, because of a mixture of self-confidence issues and because my last few relationships with sexual people have ended poorly.

My advise? Spend time watching people. I've done a lot of people watching and when you do it enough you managed to pick up on folks.

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editingatwork

I can't really help but I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. I don't do well with signs, romantic-wise. I can pick up other social cues very easily but for some reason I'm totally oblivious on the romantic front. I always have no idea until someone tells me outright that they are interested in me in a romantic way.

What I did was if I liked someone, I just told them. Yes, rejection sucks but I hate dwelling on what ifs.

I'm decent at picking up on signs, but I don't like them, for much the reasons I think a lot of people find "signs" frustrating: they can be unclear. I think the reason people have trouble figuring out whether someone likes them is because we all have different ways of expressing different levels of friendship and affection, so it leaves a LOT open for interpretation. I'm not much of a romantic, I guess. I don't like mystery in my relationships, I like to know where I stand, or at least have an open line of communication. I think you can pay attention to people, study the way they treat others as opposed how they act around you and see how it differs or how it's the same, and make intuitive or educated guesses based on that information.

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Here's how you tell. Now this isn't absolute fact but it's pretty close. If you hang out and you have to ask yourself "does she like me?" or "was that a sign?" then it probably was and you have grounds to ask if she likes you, most of the time your gut is right in these cases. But if you're saying that your gut just doesn't get these feelings then their is no cure for that.

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If it makes you feel better, I told a friend that I liked someone and asked her if I could practice on her. So I kept saying I loved her and I was stuttering and I even asked her to pretend to my gf so someone would leave me alone a couple times. She didn't realize I liked her until I told her. And that was about 7 or 9 months later.

Oooh... it sounds like a rom-com, only real :) It sounds sweet and cute.

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Not everyone's dated. I havn't really dated. Besides love's mushy and you know what's also mushy?

...Peas?

Well, yes. But no. Vomit's mushy. And so is love. I don't wanna fall in lovey dovey vomit.

Think you're more likely to slip in it first...

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Not everyone's dated. I havn't really dated. Besides love's mushy and you know what's also mushy?

...Peas?

Well, yes. But no. Vomit's mushy. And so is love. I don't wanna fall in lovey dovey vomit.

Think you're more likely to slip in it first...

Awh, now I get it. People fall in love, and think it's all happy, than they realize they fell in the pile of vomit. Bleh.

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pale-landscape

I would say don't sweat it. I've found it more detrimental to start wondering if someone likes me just because they seem "nicer" to me than others, when it isn't necessarily the case.

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This might not help you much, but for me, I didn't really see the signs until the end of my first relationship. In the midst of it, I was thinking "Are we official yet? Are we together? How do I ask him?" every time we were together. And I didn't realize he considered us in a relationship... until he ended it! To the point where when he said it, I was happy because I had a boyfriend the whole time and just didn't realize it. And now looking back, I can see the signs of when it changed and everything perfectly. So yeah, hindsight is 20/20... but that's the best I've got! Sorry!

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Well, I haven't dated much at all, either. I think it's an Aspergers trait --- to be oblivious to signs of interest.

The only real way you can know if someone's interested is watch their baseline behavior with other people and compare how they treat you.

Actions speak a LOT louder than words in this case.

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