Alaskye Posted November 19, 2014 Share Posted November 19, 2014 I'm surely not the only asexual in a relationship with a sexual person. While it's not something I want, sex is something I'd be generally okay with if it were to happen. I'm kind of "meh" about the whole thing. I don't really like it, but it's not something I'm terribly uncomfortable with and I'm not repulsed, so I'd be willing to compromise. Only.. the whole birth control thing kind of bothers me. I've been on the pill for a few years and stopped because it badly started to affect my mood (increased depression-like tendencies). I switched to another type of pill, which somehow gave me very, very painful abdominal pains, so I stopped taking that after about two months. And honestly, I feel a lot better now. Personally, I don't have any incentive to start taking the birth control pill again, especially because my experiences with it this year haven't been very good (and I'm pretty terrible at remembering to take it in the first place). The only reason why I would start taking it again is to be able to have sex with my boyfriend, which is something I don't even particularly want in the first place anyway. And that makes me feel really uncomfortable (dealing with the possible side effects, the idea of compromising my body by taking pills for someone else, as well as the every day reminder that I'm doing something for someone else I don't even want myself). I guess I'm just posting this to see if anyone recognises this or has experienced something similar. As well as advice, I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
ButtCountyDanceParty Posted November 19, 2014 Share Posted November 19, 2014 I'm sure plenty of people here have good advice, but probably what would be the most helpful is having this conversation with your doctor and with your boyfriend once you two address the issue of sex. There are quite a few birth control options out there, so your doctor might be able to help you figure out which one is going to be the safest and most comfortable for you if you choose to keep trying. But if you really resent the idea of having to go on birth control in the first place, it could be that your boyfriend doesn't want or isn't expecting you to have to do that. On this and any other issue, a big part of any relationship is figuring out together how you feel about things, compromising where you feel the compromise is worth it, figuring out what you can both live with and sometimes going your separate ways when you can't arrive at a solution that works for both of you. But still, you have to have that conversation before you can find out what he expects and maybe before you can even figure out what you want to do in this situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Sally Posted November 19, 2014 Share Posted November 19, 2014 If you are in the US and you don't have health insurance that would cover birth control (or even if you do), check out Planned Parenthood. They have the best array of possibilities for any woman wondering what she could do to prevent pregnancy. They also have a completely accepting attitude, which isn't always the case with all doctors. Link to post Share on other sites
imgone Posted November 19, 2014 Share Posted November 19, 2014 I went up two cup sizes last time I was on the pill, and so I was really nervous to go on it again. I told my doctor my concerns and so far I don't think I've been having any trouble with this new kind. But it sounds like you've already switched around a few times, so that might not be what you want to do. There are a number of other birth control methods... You can get an IUD, or I hear there's some sort of shot or something you can get? Do people still use diaphragms? I wouldn't know, haha. The problem is none of those are as non-invasive, easy, and/or convenient as the pill. Other option: does your guy have anything against just using a rubber? I know people complain about decreased sensitivity, but like a) they make super thin ones apparently and b) nobody getting pregnant is kind of more important. Link to post Share on other sites
Noky Posted November 20, 2014 Share Posted November 20, 2014 They have a lot of things like implants, IM injections and IUDs. Cervical caps and diaphragms, as ButtCounty was saying. You should definitely talk with a doc and with your boyfriend. It should be fairly easy to find one that works out. Best of luck :). Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted November 20, 2014 Share Posted November 20, 2014 There are a lot of contraceptive options if you don't like the pill. Talk to a doctor, PP, whatever and discuss them if it is something you want. You can also go old fashioned and just use condoms. None of them are 100% (only removing the parts or not having sex at all is 100%) but you can lower the risk of pregnancy a lot. I personally have never been on the pill because insurance doesn't cover it and ... everyone I know has had bad complications with it anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
PatheticGirl Posted November 20, 2014 Share Posted November 20, 2014 Check on what were the two pills you took till now. Then let your doc know the symptoms. then they might help you with something better. But get into sex only if you are happy seeing him happy. Otherwise, won't be worth it for you. Link to post Share on other sites
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