Repairman13 Posted November 7, 2014 Share Posted November 7, 2014 So, I have never been the one to strive for having sex. I figured it was just a fear of intimacy or vulnerability that comes with it. But now, I'm wondering if I was actually asexual the whole time. Since I do masturbate, I looked into the corolation between asexuality and arousal and there is a division between sexual attraction and sexual arousal, which I don't quite understand. If anyone could provide some insight into my issue as it relates to asexuality, as well as the difference between attraction and arousal and how they factor in to what qualifies someone for said identity. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
poindexter Posted November 7, 2014 Share Posted November 7, 2014 Arousal/libido is something a lot of asexuals experience, though often they are happy dealing with it themselves rather than looking for a sexual partner to satisfy their needs. It has nothing to do with your orientation, it's not focused at anyone, it's just an undirected, physical urge. Sexual attraction is when you want to have sex with someone, or imagine what it would be like to have sex with that person. If you get aroused when you look at someone, that is sexual attraction. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
xserpx Posted November 7, 2014 Share Posted November 7, 2014 So, I have never been the one to strive for having sex. I figured it was just a fear of intimacy or vulnerability that comes with it. But now, I'm wondering if I was actually asexual the whole time. Since I do masturbate, I looked into the corolation between asexuality and arousal and there is a division between sexual attraction and sexual arousal, which I don't quite understand. If anyone could provide some insight into my issue as it relates to asexuality, as well as the difference between attraction and arousal and how they factor in to what qualifies someone for said identity. There are many asexuals who are aroused by fictional characters or certain fetishes. It doesn't mean they want sex, or find any real person sexually arousing. That's pretty much all there is to it - your orientation is based on the gender of (real) people you want sex with; it's not about what you masturbate to. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WünderBâhr Posted November 7, 2014 Share Posted November 7, 2014 The AVENWiki is a great resource for information on general topics within AVEN as related to terminology used throughout the asexual community. Arousal =/= attraction; it is merely biological reaction to stimulus as I see it. The AVENWiki article discussing Asexuality has this to say about arousal: For some sexual arousal is a fairly regular occurrence, though it is not associated with a desire to find a sexual partner or partners. Some asexuals will occasionally masturbate, but feel no desire for partnered sexuality. Other asexual people experience little or no arousal. Asexual people generally do not see a lack of sexual arousal as a problem to be corrected, and focus their energy on enjoying other types of arousal and pleasure.[1] Note: People do not need sexual arousal to be healthy, but in a minority of cases a lack of arousal can be the symptom of a more serious medical condition. If you do not experience sexual arousal or if you suddenly lose interest in sex you should probably see a doctor just to be safe. There is also an AVENWiki article, here, about attraction and the various forms of attraction that are often pointed to and recognized within the community. Feel free to browse the wiki and continue reading through the forums. You'll find that many of our members have had similar experiences. As for using the labels, well... That is ultimately up to you. We do have sex-positive members as well as sex-repulsed, so even within the AVEN community, experiences with sexual activity also vary and should not be the main indicator of whether or not to identify under a label. Take your time and figure out what best suits you. :) Welcome to the community! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
WünderBâhr Posted November 10, 2014 Share Posted November 10, 2014 Asexuals are generally characterized by significantly lower arousability than most sexuals. That isn't to say they can't get aroused, just that it takes a lot more to turn on an asexual than to turn on a sexual. I disagree. Arousal, or the amount of stimulus is irrelevant, no matter if it is an asexual vs a sexual. It could be someone who experiences a high libido, but generally doesn't care to do anything about it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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