elvenofaven Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 I know this may be touchy, but it's important to me.. I am an observant Catholic Christian. I practice and enjoy my faith, but how does asexuality fit in? Just any opinions or thoughts? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 I am an ex Christian. I practice my faith. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ace of Cakes Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 I'm a practicing Protestant Christian, but here are my thoughts. I see no conflict between Christianity and asexuality, especially before marriage or outside of marriage if marriage is never an intention. Since we don't really esire sex there is no issue there, and even people who don't get the ace thing would be pretty accepting if they could just understand it as a sort of call to singleness or as a choice to be abstinent or celibate. While that's not as good as true acceptance, for me at least, it's better than nothing. And from God's point of view, there isn't anything wrong with being ace if that's the way He made us! Whether or not everyone in the church will recognize that is another issue... I don't know if you identify as a particular romantic orientation, but I'm heteroromantic and hope to marry someday. I'm currently struggling with 1 Corinthians 7 (not the part where Paul talks about singleness, but where he talks about submitting to one's husband and says that a married couple should only be abstinent for a short time etc.). If I married an ace I wouldn't really see a problem there, but my boyfriend is heterosexual, so if we did end up getting married... I don't know. I hope I'd be able to have sex sometimes and that I would be okay with doing that. I think a compromise/sacrifice on my part would work for me, but 1 cor. 7 worries me and reminds me that by "withholding sex" I would be tempting him, even if he's okay with not having it... Those are just some thoughts I'm struggling with now, but I don't think there is really a conflict as long as communication is huge in the relationship. Again though, the church may have other thoughts, but I don't think God would be too opposed personally Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Anime Pancake Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 Some people may say you have to have sex, because it is mentioned to "be fruitful and multiply" somewhere like near the beginning of time in the Old Testament,but when I look into my heart, I personally don't believe that lack of sex is a sin.I don't feel like I'm sinning by choosing not to have sex. If you want more details, I can write more a little later.Good question though! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kelico Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 There's a thread somewhere for religious aces and the conversation about asexuality and religion...that thread is somewhere, but I don't remember where lol. But if you find it, you'll see some more answers there, too. : ) Anyhoo, I'm a Presbyterian--practicing--and before I discovered asexuality, I just thought my lack of sexual attraction/desire was connected to being taught, "No sex before marriage." But...then I realized that wasn't the case. Even if allosexuals are practicing Christians and adhere to "no sex before marriage," that doesn't mean they don't have sexual attraction/desire! And like Ace of Cakes said, I think that God made us all who we are for a reason. If He created asexuals, then there's nothing wrong with that! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ace of Cakes Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 I just thought my lack of sexual attraction/desire was connected to being taught, "No sex before marriage." Just saying, this was one of the biggest reasons it took me so long to figure out I was ace and not just a really good/really lucky Christian or something Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kelico Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 I just thought my lack of sexual attraction/desire was connected to being taught, "No sex before marriage." Just saying, this was one of the biggest reasons it took me so long to figure out I was ace and not just a really good/really lucky Christian or something Yes! Totally! I simply assumed I was just really sticking to my Christian teachings lol. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
twix Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 As long as any religious group marries couples who are past child bearing years, the "be fruitful and multiply" directive is not an iron-clad regulation for marriage. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Winnie_A Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 I just thought my lack of sexual attraction/desire was connected to being taught, "No sex before marriage." Just saying, this was one of the biggest reasons it took me so long to figure out I was ace and not just a really good/really lucky Christian or something Yes! Totally! I simply assumed I was just really sticking to my Christian teachings lol. Same here! Since I was taught that sex was only something that belonged in marriage, it seemed like it would be a complete non-issue for me as a teenager. It was only after I began to think "well what about after I'm married? Will I feel any different then? And how am I supposed to marry someone if I don't already know I will want to have sex with him?" that I realized something was up. I am a Christian and I don't have any trouble reconciling that with my asexuality. While in 1st Corinthians chapter 7 Paul talks about husbands and wives fulfilling their sexual duties, so to speak, with one another to prevent adultery, the passage is also riddled with praise for abstaining from sex and for staying single. Jesus wasn't married, and presumably didn't have sex, and he's a good role model as any. Coming from a very conservative family, I'm actually quite relieved that of all the "alternative" sexualities I could have been I turned out to be asexual. It seems the safest. My parents would probably much rather I never bring someone home than I bring home another girl ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
thatotherguy57 Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 I was raised Southern Baptist, I became agnostic when I was about 19 or 20. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Greyt Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Speaking as an agnostic who was brought up in a somewhat religious family, i doubt that there would be any problems at all. I'm pretty sure that it wasn't even a concept back then when the bible was written and the church can't just turn around now that they know about asexuality and say that there's something wrong with it. They can't just edit the bible and say that's it always been there. They can choose to ignore us however which imo is preferable to them spouting hate speech at us. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Some people may say you have to have sex, because it is mentioned to "be fruitful and multiply" somewhere like near the beginning of time in the Old Testament, God gave them sex for pleasure not just for children. That is my understanding from what I've studied and learned. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
elvenofaven Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 It's interesting to see all the different perspectives here! I personally do think that it's okay, so yeah. But keep sharing! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ashmedai Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 I'm of a religious leaning myself, and find that abstinence rather personally honourable, and asexuality makes that a bit easier in a lot of cases. I'm not really sure how you could slot that in being Catholic, but I'm sure there'd be a way. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Octopus710 Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Same here! Since I was taught that sex was only something that belonged in marriage, it seemed like it would be a complete non-issue for me as a teenager. It was only after I began to think "well what about after I'm married? Will I feel any different then? And how am I supposed to marry someone if I don't already know I will want to have sex with him?" that I realized something was up. Same for me. For some time now, I've been living the idea of no sex before marriage, but it was way before the religious shift in my life that I was wondering about sex in a marriage. I remember the passage in the bible saying that sex is for the bond of marriage, for the two partners to enjoy each other. If asexuality is ok for both of them, it should be in the marriage as well. But I do think married people should have children but not necessarily reproduce (adoption,...). I've alway wondered about the couples without children. Why marry after all? This is a big mystery for me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Ficulnean Posted October 12, 2014 Share Posted October 12, 2014 Well, I'm not religious but at least you'll never commit the sin of lust, which some people who follow the no sex before marriage undoubtedly will. If God forgives them, then he'll certainly forgive the inverse sin of not having sex, if not having sex even is a sin. (Like I said, I don't know.) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sleepy One Posted October 13, 2014 Share Posted October 13, 2014 I'm a practicing Catholic and for the longest time couldn't figure out why we were always being reminded to resist the temptation of sex before marriage just because I didn't see what there was to resist since I didn't feel anything. Figuring out I was asexual was a big "ohhhhh so that's why it's a non-issue for me" moment lol I don't find me being asexual to conflict with my faith at all. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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