Nixi Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Wanted to get some verification on this. I've never identified as any of these until recently. I spent about half of my life thinking that I was bisexual and super oversexed until I understood that I wanted to own other people through sex because of validation issues opposed to actually naturally being sexual. I came out of that point of my life when bettering myself as a person. Moving on. After that turning point everything in my life shifted and I began to understand what I truly was underneath all of the validation. I have this thing where I'll feel hollow sexual attraction where I can find someone aesthetically pleasing but I don't want to have sex with them. Where sexual people feel the groin impulse to do something to someone, I just get this tingle that I find someone very attractive. Even though I've had sex with more than 30 people I actually don't like sex. Can't stand it. So I feel that appreciation for someone physically without wanting them in any kind of way. It's like a sexual person would make that jump to do things with them or have fantasies but I don't because I don't like sex. Feel me?BUT I like mental sex. Like I get turned on by mental images of sex and the majority of it is about characters that represent me in some way where I'm ultimately being turned on by projections of myself doing sexual things. Kind of like a bird's eye view effect. Also not into people romantically whatsoever. I make a great friend but I realized that I'm not interested in romance and technically never have been. Ever. Just thought I was because of the validation. So I'm wondering if anyone else has this combination or can comment on this with their insight. These waters are very new for me and I'm trying to figure out where I stand. I think I've clarified it but it seems a bit confusing. Link to post Share on other sites
The Wreyck Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Sounds kinda self-sexual. That's what I am. Maybe. Although, do you enjoy masturbation and such? A self-sexual enjoys "sex", but not with other people. Just, essentially masturbation I s'pose. And it looks like you just experience aesthetic attraction, which is fairly normal for many aromantic asexuals.I can become aroused at the ideas of sexual erotica in my mind, by myself, or by stories also. But never real people, really. It's can be a long path to self-discovery on all this stuff, but that's okay. You'll be better in the end for it. And welcome to AVEN. Have some cake. ;) Link to post Share on other sites
Nixi Posted September 10, 2014 Author Share Posted September 10, 2014 Sounds kinda self-sexual. That's what I am. Maybe. Although, do you enjoy masturbation and such? A self-sexual enjoys "sex", but not with other people. Just, essentially masturbation I s'pose. And it looks like you just experience aesthetic attraction, which is fairly normal for many aromantic asexuals. I can become aroused at the ideas of sexual erotica in my mind, by myself, or by stories also. But never real people, really. It's can be a long path to self-discovery on all this stuff, but that's okay. You'll be better in the end for it. And welcome to AVEN. Have some cake. ;) I do actually but it doesn't happen often physically. I think I prefer mental masturbation because I'm not fond of the human body when I'm in contact with it. Like where I think about erotica either with a projection or mental voyuerism. I'm turned on by that and then it ends like when you're done physically masturbating. Thank you for your comments! They're very helpful, including if anyone else wants to contribute. Is there a difference between self-sexuality and auto-eroticism? Link to post Share on other sites
The Wreyck Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Thank you for your comments! They're very helpful, including if anyone else wants to contribute. Is there a difference between self-sexuality and auto-eroticism? You're welcome! And I wasn't actually very familiar with the term autoeroticism, so I checked it out in order to potentially answer your question. It seems to me that they are rather similar, yes. Though from my understanding, autoeroticism can result in merely mental stimulation like you just described, and I belief self-sexuals do indeed carry it into the physical aspect also. Though I could be wrong. I'm actually myself newer to the term self-sexual. But that is how my self-sexual asexuality plays out for me personally. Link to post Share on other sites
Someone Else Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 I'd probably be more interested in my partner masturbating than I would be in doing anything with or without a partner myself. Link to post Share on other sites
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