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On Compliments About Appearance (Asexuals /Grey-As only)


shockkkk

How do you feel (in general) if someone calls you...  

1 member has voted

  1. 1. Sexy

    • Good
      41
    • Neutral
      75
    • Bad
      213
  2. 2. Hot

    • Good
      51
    • Neutral
      96
    • Bad
      182
  3. 3. Cute

    • Good
      191
    • Neutral
      81
    • Bad
      57
  4. 4. Pretty

    • Good
      196
    • Neutral
      96
    • Bad
      37

This poll is closed to new votes


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I cannot vote as I have never had anyone call me any of those titles in my entire life

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I find all these things very flattering. It's nice to feel wanted.

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I hate being called sexy. Hot is bad but not as bad as sexy. I've been called cute a lot because I'm short, and while I can't say I necessarily agree it's still nice. Pretty is... eh. It's sort of a boring word to use for someone's general appearance. I'm neutral.

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i hate being called all of these but it might be associated with gender identity as well as asexuality :S

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Depending on who says it, 'cute' can be a bit patronising. I don't know if anyone has ever called me cute, other than ironically xD

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  • 7 months later...

Sexy makes me extremely uncomfortable and hot is a little better but I prefer cute and pretty is second to that. Being called cute tends to make me happy if it's coming from someone I'm friends with. Any of them coming from a stranger would make me feel awkward but cute or pretty less so.

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SpAceViking

I prefer to think of myself as "cute" (or average-looking). I've been called cute before by friends, and I kind of liked that, since it can be taken as being about apperance as well as about personality and behaviour. I don't like it coming from strangers though. I HATE "sexy" and "hot", because I don't want people to see me that way, and because I often find them creepy. "Pretty" is okay, I guess.

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GoosePeelings

All of those make me very uncomfortable.

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I've never been called 'hot' or 'sexy' (at least, not jokingly) before, but provided it was in a non-creepy way from someone I knew as a friend I suppose I would find it vaguely flattering as I would assume that means good-looking, but more amusing than anything else. If it was from a random stranger, or someone I didn't know that well...I'd find that a tad creepy. I'm a bit neutral about being called 'cute'...when I hear the word 'cute' I think of adorable little fluffy creatures like bunnies and kittens...and I really don't think I'm a 'cute' person in that sense. Pretty is alright, though.

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Toby The Casual Prince

Anything that implies someone could find me sexually attractive makes me uncomfortable. So sexy and hot aren't words I want to hear when I'm being described. Pretty and cute are okay

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scarletlatitude

The #1 way to make me leave so fast you'll think that I've vanished is to mention anything about my appearance. It's boring and superficial.

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Pretty = feminine as far as compliments go and I'm not going for feminine.

So not liking being called pretty is not about being ace, to me its about being a guy.

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With "hot" or "sexy" I'd probably be a little uncomfortable (unless it was a friend), but I so rarely receive compliments that I think I would be more happy than uncomfortable. I don't think I've actually ever been called "hot" or "sexy", so I'm really just guessing there though.

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Grumpy Alien

Good to all, as they are positive. I'd just not believe them.

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Bad to all but pretty, and that is only barely neutral. "Sexy" and "hot" just aren't descriptors I want associated with myself, and I tend to have a kneejerk reaction that they're rather demeaning; they also imply something about that person's thoughts that I'd really rather not know, if they must be thinking it. "Cute" sounds like something that should be applied to tiny, helpless animals, not me. It feels insulting. "Pretty" isn't what I'd choose to describe myself, but it doesn't offend me. It's a fairly bland sort of compliment. I'd rather most others, or none at all, but it doesn't annoy me to be called that.

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My girlfriend calls me pretty and cute. I like that because I know what she means (she also has no interest in sex). But if coming from a stranger, I'm not sure how I would take it. Cute would probably imply some degree of stupidity, and pretty is, well, alright. Anyway, I voted good for those two options since I didn't think much further than my girlfriend, as she's the only one in recent memory I can recall having called me by those terms.

Hot and sexy. Well, I said neutral and bad. Expression of sexual interest makes me uncomfortable, though.

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Squirrel Combat

There should have been a handsome for us guys. For the most part I feel pretty good about myself. I certainly attract the attention of many ladies. But I wouldn't call myself "hot" or "sexy". I mean I am a guy.

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I put good for all of them because we live in an extremely sexualised world and I like getting compliments.

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dandelionfluff

I think it's a shame that people associate appreciating one's appearance aesthetically must be interpreted in a sexual manner. Obviously, if someone calls you sexy they mean it sexually, but pretty, cute, gorgeous, etc., are not to be taken sexually necessarily, in my opinion at least. I understand that to allosexual people it may have sexual connotations, but anyone, regardless of sexuality can appreciate someone's appearance without their being a sexual undertone. Compliments on one's appearance may pertain to your facial features, hair style, your clothing, your figure, etc. I have been complimented on my appearance on various occasion and I don't mind it at all. The only thing I mind is how to respond, since I usually just say and awkward "thank you" and that's it lol. Otherwise I welcome compliments very much. People complimenting are usually doing to to be nice or because they honestly find you attractive. That doesn't mean they lusting after you or anything. I have had men come up to me and compliment me, I say thank you and they about their day. Then there are men who take the opportunity to try and ask me out. But most of the time, a compliment is just a compliment, and many times if I am feeling crappy or not so confident it can help brighten my mood.

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Never had a girl compliment me. If one did I'd say "wtf is wrong with you"

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Sexy and hot seem condescending to me. Since I've noticed that the people who use those words, use it for many many people. Same with the word "babe". Just me trying to say the word sexy makes me cringe.

Pretty or cute is alright, I guess. It doesn't really seem genuine to me, though. I don't mind it, but it seems fake to me.

Source : My perceptions

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Sexy/Hot: Very bad! In my native language, the equivalent word for those two adjectives would be "gostosa", which can also be used to compliment a good tasting food. So obviously I don't like being somehow compared to something people would eat. It's a word that catcallers like to use a lot, which makes it even worse! Besides, it implies that the people who've said it are/were sexually attracted to me, which makes me feel dirty and disgusted. I can't help but thinking less of people who call me that... :/

Cute: Good. I think I've been called cute once or twice in my life, and it made me feel a bit flattered. I think it's because the word "cute" is more related to how I dress or act, and less to my physical appearance.

Pretty: Neutral. It just bores me... I don't mind being called pretty (by women), but I dislike when heterosexual men expect me to react in a specific way when they tell me that. I just don't get super happy and excited when someone find me pretty, especially if they expect to get something in return (I don't remember being complimented on my physical appearance by a heterosexual man who wasn't interested in me).

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I've never really even cared much about being complimented on looks :P

(hot/sexy: bad, because i don't get what that's suppose to mean... cute/pretty: neutral.... see above...)

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DigitalBookDust

I checked "neutral" for sexy and hot b/c there wasn't a "pissed-off" category. I don't feel BAD-I get angry. It's sexist and demeaning. Besides, I go OUT OF MY WAY not wear sexy, provocative, or tight clothing, so if someone id calling me "sexy" or "hot", they're either deluded or just looking for trouble. As far pretty and cute go, pfft! I HATE being called either. I might be fashionable; I be edgy; I might be many things, but "pretty or "cute" is not one of them!

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Neutral on sexy/hot because well, they can't help their feelings, but no more than that.

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Bad, all choices. I tend to always think people are lying. So I either feel bad, and or assume they like my bad looks like in a weird way (nothing wrong with that). Don't know why. Probably because I got made fun of a lot in high school for being too ugly. I also hate being cute... my brain associates cute with weak. So theres that as well.

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In "general" if someone called me any of those things I would be indifferent. The only reason I would feel "bad" is out of worry that they are flirting or something. That puts me in a bad situation as an aromatic asexual. Besides that I don't care.

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One (girl) friend of mine says I'm cute and it feels kinda... degrading. I want to be seen as a tough cookie, and I feel that cuteness doesn't quite fit the tough cookie vibe. :'D

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Call me shallow but I answered "Good" for all of these.

Just felt shitty about my appearance all my life so these still make me feel a (much needed) ego boost

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Happy Kitty

"Hot" and "sexy" are embarrassing. The others are OK.

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