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How can an ace be aroused by a person?


The Tree Girl

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The Tree Girl

Hi!

If I understand correctly, arousal is mostly a biological thing where your body prepares to have sex because it "thinks" you're going to have sex even though you don't really want to have sex, like salivating when you think about food. I understand how an asexual can be aroused by genital stimulation and by thinking about sex. I also get how an asexual could be aroused by a person acting sexually to them.

However, I read that some aces are aroused by seemingly non-sexual things like a person that they think is good-looking walking by or talking to someone they know. Why does this make their bodies think they're going to have sex? It seems like it wouldn't because since they're not attracted to the person, the person wouldn't make them think about sex. Thanks :)

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Sexual attraction and sexual arousal are different things. You don't need sexual attraction to have sexual arousal... If that were the case people would only have sex with people whom they are sexually attracted to, and I don't think that is the case.

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Nonlibidoist that is pretty sure he's never experienced arousal, so... beats me.

From what I've heard people saying though, our bodies are just wonky sometimes.

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I think this is just an individual thing really. Another reason why labels can be bad at times. For example, knowing that my partner and I will be successful at what we both love doing together and then abstaining from sex for periods of times always gets me very excited, but let say I get disappointed in this idealistic idea then I find myself disgusted by the idea of sex.

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Being aroused by traditionally "non-sexual" things sounds more like a fetish or kink than wanting sex with the person. Also having a libido doesn't mean you're not asexual.

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iamphoenixfire

A lot of my friends are sexual guys, and from them I hear a lot about the dreaded random awkward boner. Basically, getting randomly aroused when you have absolutely nothing nearby or in your thoughts that would be arousing you. Girls do this too, but a nice perk about being a FAAB is that when you are aroused you dont need to constantly hide the giant thing sticking out between your legs.

I don't particularly know why this happens. But it does, and it is really annoying sometimes when youre sitting in calculus and all of the sudden your lower half wants to learn about the limits of its equations. But if you have a libido, then this happens on occasion. But attraction and arousal are different. Am I suddenly sexually attracted to the square root of seven because I'm doing math homework and get a lady boner? No. That is crazy. Bodies are weird. You just gotta learn to roll with them.

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The Tree Girl

I get that you can get aroused for no reason, but what I mean is, are some asexuals aroused specifically because of a nonsexual encounter with another person? If so, what is the physical/mental process behind that happening?

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I'm an ace and can get aroused by looking at a particular person, just like a non ace. I just have zero desire to sleep with them and have no sexual attraction towards them. It's not much more complicated than that.

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Marshmallow Tree

However, I read that some aces are aroused by seemingly non-sexual things like a person that they think is good-looking walking by or talking to someone they know. Why does this make their bodies think they're going to have sex? It seems like it wouldn't because since they're not attracted to the person, the person wouldn't make them think about sex. Thanks :)

I remember a piece from a very interesting documentary. Most people get aroused by anything to do with sex, no matter how little the change is (e.g. a slight increase of blood flow). Simply hearing the words sex can initiate arousal. Our brains are very primitive (though we like to think otherwise). Even hearing the word 'paedophilia' can initiate you (if you're a female) to widen and (if you're a male) go erect. This doesn't mean you are attracted to children, it's just evolutionary that the body simply thinks about sex and gets itself ready despite the actuality of your sexuality or your will.

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