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What Am I?


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So I found AVEN about 2 months ago and I found that I fit in, or at least I think I do. So at first I thought that I was gay because I never found any interest in girls. So I started thinking of other guys and I recently found out that I do think the male body is more attractive than the female body but I don't find it sexual. Male/Female bodies or anything in between to me is and has been beautiful in the sense of art and how it can be portrayed in art but yet I still find the male body more attractive, again not in a sexual way. So now in high school everyone is boy/girl crazy so I thought "Let me try to be 'normal'" and so I tried to think of other guys in a romantic sense because I thinking of them in a sexual way is un-natural to me and extremely uncomfortable. Yet whenever I force myself to think of another guy it never is me and the other guy but someone in my place. Who that someone is I don't know I just know it's not me. I still feel the inclination to be with another guy but it seems unrealistic and not me. What are your thoughts? Am I aromantic/asexual, homoromantic/asexual or anything in between?

P.S Sorry if this is hard to understand or if this makes no sense I really don't know what else to put but feel free to ask questions. Thank you for your time.

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You need to date and experiment more in order to figure out who you are. You could be demi, and what attracts you won't be known to you until you feel an emotional connection with someone. You could be sapiosexual and a person's intellect is more attractive than their body. There are scores of labels and combinations for romantic and sexual attraction. You don't have to be limited to straight, gay, bi, pan, or ace.

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I seem to have misplaced the larger image...but this is always a good way to look at different types of attraction:

tumblr_m366elTLrw1qbtg0uo1_500.jpg

And/or check out these definitions: http://www.asexuality.org/wiki/index.php?title=Attraction

Only you can truly define yourself--so go with what you feel fits you the most. : ) But I shared those so you can see that there are more types of attraction than just sexual and romantic! If you've never felt sexually attracted to anyone, then yeah, you could be asexual. If you're more attracted to other males--but not necessarily romantically--perhaps that's aesthetic attraction you are feeling! Or maybe you are a gray (or demi)-homoromantic asexual. Just keep looking around the site and seeing what feels right to you! :cake: You never have to force yourself into a box either. It's all about what makes you most comfortable to identify as!

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Ultimately, who you are is up to you. There is only so much information that you can convey over the internet unfortunately, so no matter how much you tell us about yourself, you'll always know yourself much better than we ever will be able to. So, in the end, it is your call; explore with labels and see which ones (if any) fit. Personally, I identify as ace because the word feels like home. It feels right, like if it were a piece of clothing it would be a second skin. Maybe even the first skin ;)

From what you say, I'd definitely consider asexual as a label. You can also check out the grey areas, if you so please of course. But some form of romantic asexual label may at least be a good place to start. Try it on for size, see how it goes. You can always change later if it isn't quite right, or you find a better word to describe who you are, or if you just decide that labels aren't your thing in the end. People are fluid; let the label describe you, not constrain you.

Oh, and welcome to AVEN! I'm so glad it feels like home to you too. Pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable :cake:

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