JLong Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 I'm really curious to see peoples' takes on this. I do like being attractive, but sometimes I feel like there are people who would call me a tease if they knew I was asexual. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Copper Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 I would probably feel flattered if someone thought I was attractive. I would freak out if they tried to act on their attraction though. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
kelico Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 I take care of my looks so that I look decent lol, but I honestly don't like being referred to as "sexy," so I guess I should say no? I want to look attractive in my own way, but not sexually attractive, if that makes sense. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 Not really....but I wouldn't like be seen as ugly. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lies_As_Lau Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 Eh, I imagine some asexuals do, but I don't really care. I'm more worried about the soul connections than anything, everyone else doesn't matter to me Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lyariage Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 The idea of being sexually attractive has always really confused me. If any of my partners did call me 'sexy' I never understood why they were saying it. I still don't get the whole point of why it's important for a lot of people. But I think that's cause I don't personally understand how sex is so important for a lot of people. That's just me. I guess my perceptions are ace through and through :P As a side thought... identifying as asexual but still wanting to be sexually attractive sounds contradictory to me. Being asexual means you don't experience sexual attraction, yeah? So I don't understand why someone would want to advertise their sexual appeal, I guess, to other people. I fully allow other people to express themselves however they want, and am fully up to hearing other points of view. The idea of it confuses me, is all. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kulukan Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 Nope. I'm glad I'm unattractive. It makes being ace a whole lot easier. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
argar Posted July 20, 2014 Share Posted July 20, 2014 I have to say no. I'm not comfortable inspiring an emotion that is alien in me sometimes. Thankfully I don't think I inspire that in people, so it's not really a problem. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Tja Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I wouldn't mind being considered sensually attractive, but those days are long gone. To salve my ego, I will admit that I was quite popular and attractive in the past. ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I love being sexually attractive for my sweetie... Whether that entails pajamas and dressing gown or getting dolled up in a kinky maid outfit, I want to be hot for him hehe We are both sensual aces: lots of sensuality and attraction, just no partnered sex :P Quote Link to post Share on other sites
alpacaterpillar Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I want to be romantically (and maybe sensually) attractive. I tend to get more attention of a sexual nature though (that I notice, anyway). So I guess I'd say no. As a side thought... identifying as asexual but still wanting to be sexually attractive sounds contradictory to me. Being asexual means you don't experience sexual attraction, yeah? So I don't understand why someone would want to advertise their sexual appeal, I guess, to other people. I fully allow other people to express themselves however they want, and am fully up to hearing other points of view. The idea of it confuses me, is all. I personally have tended to identify being sexually attracted with being interested in a relationship. As time goes on though I'm beginning to differentiate between those more and more, as I've only ever really got the impression girls just want to have sex with me and leave it at that. I can't speak for others though - maybe it's a dynamic in socialising? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Capslock Cadet Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I once saw a post on tumblr that said something along the lines of "I would dress a 1000% more skimpy if men didn't think I dress for them", and I think that pretty much sums it up for me. I can enjoy dressing up in all kinds of ways, but knowing how some people will look at me because of it just... yeah. I end up not dressing that way a lot of the time simply because I don't feel entirely comfortable when the whole "people will expect a certain attitude from me if I dress this way" thing comes into play. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Chardog Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I like to look good and take care of myself for ME.. And those people who already know me and can be appreciative of the effort I make to take care of myself and look good (ie- genuine compliments not meant to "score points"). I hate random compliments/being hit on by guys for two reasons: 1) I can't relate to being physically attracted to someone in any way workout knowing them on a deeply personal level first. 2) Despite not having much body dysphoria personally, I don't identify as female despite presenting that way and that attention does make me dysphoric.. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
deltaX Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 Not really, no. I mean, I wouldn't want to be super ugly, but I am thankful that I'm rather plain and average looking rather than "sexy" or "attractive". One thing I like about my appearance is that it doesn't attract much positive or negative attention based on my looks. Besides being much shorter than normal girls, there isn't much about me that is noteworthy. I want people to notice or like me because of my personality, not because of my what I look like, and as a result, on the rare occasion I get complimented on my appearance I feel super awkward. I also feel guilty turning down guys who have crushes on me so I am glad my body doesn't attract any extra sexual attention. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
R_1 Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 Well, if someone finds me sexually attractive, ok, enjoy it, but I don't need to know. Can I do something about it? Not really, no, so it's just something that one has to accept because some people just can't help themselves. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sebastian Grace Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 No, I don't like to be thought of as sexually attractive, and I like it even less when people let me know that they find me sexually attractive. I have a problem with how it's supposed to be a compliment that someone else would bang me. In my opinion, it's an unwarranted sentiment and remark that makes me feel gross and objectified. I don't want my worth and existence to be measured by how many people would have sex with me. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
1/100 of me Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 No one finds me attractive so I've never really thought about it. I think I'd just say "does not compute." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Amatista Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I'm not attractive but I'd love to be so I could be confident. I wouldn't like being hit a lot but at the same time I'd like the attention. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
ButtCountyDanceParty Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 There's unfortunately a lot to be gained from fitting into a societal idea of attractive: Beautiful people tend to get hired/promoted more, people are nicer to you, etc. For the most part it happens on a subconscious level, but I don't like it even though I think I often benefit from it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Fire & Rain Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I only like to fantasize about being sexually attractive just like my fantasies about sex and romance. When someone finds me sexually attractive, I feel grossed out by it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
adanada Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 Personally, I would rather someone be attracted to me aesthetically. Thinking about someone finding me sexually attractive is gross/weird Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Xavy Posted July 21, 2014 Share Posted July 21, 2014 I prefer to not be thought of as sexually attractive by anyone ....and, I certainly would never fantasize about something like that. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 1, 2014 Share Posted August 1, 2014 Blessings of the goat upon this thread. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mycroft is Yourcroft Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 I like being confident and looking good. Usually, that means people find me sexually attractive. So, yes, I do. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 I like being confident and looking good. Usually, that means people find me sexually attractive. So, yes, I do. ^^ Same here. I like to look good for me because I feel confident when I'm dressed nicely. I don't mind if people find me sexually attractive so long as they don't expect me to reciprocate. Sometimes I even like the attention, but not when they're pushy about it. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
niinaa Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 I like being confident and looking good. Usually, that means people find me sexually attractive. So, yes, I do. ^^ ah, that's exactly the words to express it! in an ideal world, i would have people find me just aesthetically, sensually (maybe), and romantically attractive, and not so much sexually attractive so that i wouldn't have to awkwardly deal with that. but that's just so idealistic and rare, it seems that sexual attraction is so primary to majority of people, but it's still more or less positive attention, and a good reflection on me, so i'll take it... and try not to lead people on too much! haha Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Philip027 Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 God, no. What would be the point of that? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sage Raven Domino Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 I think there's a similar thread in The Census already (though 'being called' and 'being' are different things), and the topic is definitely worthy. As for myself... I'd hate to harm and manipulate people via attraction (I was afraid of being manipulated by ladies for the erroneous half of my life, though it has never happened). If having an occupation that would require 'service with a smile', it would become tricky... but, thankfully, there are many home jobs available nowadays. If having a partner, I'd however succumb to their will (but advise them to be as unattractive in my presence as possible because the value of the relationship would lie in their intelligence and personality). Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Minim Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 I don't particularly care about being thought attractive. I prefer being thought of as the person I am rather than in terms of attractiveness, but it's not the worst thing in the world to be thought of as. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Calligraphette_Coe Posted August 24, 2014 Share Posted August 24, 2014 It has its advantages, I suppose, but having the wrong gender looks for my biosex and being asexual makes it feel like a dead end street in a bad part of town. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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