• Announcements

    • Kelly

      New Team members Needed--Moderator, Project Team, and Declass Team: Voting   12/10/13

      See:   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/164659-new-declass-team-member-needed-voting/   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/164657-new-moderator-member-needed-qa-co-mod-and-world-watch-mod-voting/   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/164656-new-project-team-member-needed-resources-and-education-director-voting/  
    • Kelly

      AVENues Holiday Special Edition is now live   08/17/17

      The new edition of AVENues is done!   See:        
    • Lady Girl

      Ace Community Census   11/06/17

      It’s time for the 2017 Ace Community Census!   see:   http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/162675-announcing-the-2017-ace-community-census/  
    • Heart

      Help fund AVEN's servers!   11/06/17

      AVEN is doing its annual fundraiser to raise donations for server costs! See http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/163251-aven-server-fundraiser/ for more details.  
Lauren+Bear

Kink, BDSM, and Cake

Recommended Posts

FictoVore.

I'm La_Renee on Fet and you can find me here: https://fetlife.com/users/2138156

I don't do much with it activity wise, but I'm there on a frequent enough basis to carry on a conversation. Speaking of FetLife, anyone got any funny experiences/messages from there? I remember this one message I got that verbatim, in all CAPS said "I LIVE NEXT TO SPRING HILL HIGH SCHOOL!!!" I was all like, ummmmm... Congratulations? I mean, WTF? This was a 40-something guy probably looking for a booty call, but of all things, why did he sound so excited that he lived next to the local high school and why did he think I'd care?

I don't see what's so weird about this.. he probably just thought you were going to this particular high school and was hoping you'd pop by his house during your lunch break!

haha I'm joking it's totally weird however one looks at it :p

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lauren+Bear

I made an account and have since.. forgotten my username and email *facepalm*

He sounded pleasant, Lauren... in a completely creepy way of course O.o

I looked on fetlife for a bit but it was a big, confusing place and I lost interest after a short time, I prefer the interactivity on these forums.

The only semi-less creepy (but still waaaaaaay creepy) explanation I could think of was he was into age-play and wanted me to act out some fantasy for him... Lol.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lauren+Bear

I'm La_Renee on Fet and you can find me here: https://fetlife.com/users/2138156

I don't do much with it activity wise, but I'm there on a frequent enough basis to carry on a conversation. Speaking of FetLife, anyone got any funny experiences/messages from there? I remember this one message I got that verbatim, in all CAPS said "I LIVE NEXT TO SPRING HILL HIGH SCHOOL!!!" I was all like, ummmmm... Congratulations? I mean, WTF? This was a 40-something guy probably looking for a booty call, but of all things, why did he sound so excited that he lived next to the local high school and why did he think I'd care?

I don't see what's so weird about this.. he probably just thought you were going to this particular high school and was hoping you'd pop by his house during your lunch break!

haha I'm joking it's totally weird however one looks at it :p

Thing is I graduated a few years before his message. Lol... From a completely different high school across the country.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Cali_Guy

how many aces here are actually on FetLife?

I went to the site :blush: I ask my self why a female picture why not a guy lol I guess I am just odd...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
FictoVore.

how many aces here are actually on FetLife?

I went to the site :blush: I ask my self why a female picture why not a guy lol I guess I am just odd...
you could just dress up as a female cat for you pic? that way no one would know if you are a guy or a girl or a cat ehe

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Cali_Guy

how many aces here are actually on FetLife?

I went to the site :blush: I ask my self why a female picture why not a guy lol I guess I am just odd...
you could just dress up as a female cat for you pic? that way no one would know if you are a guy or a girl or a cat ehe

Stop reading my mind... You killed my idea. I have one word for you Pan MEOW!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lauren+Bear

Hmmmmmm... Let's talk kinks/fetishes for a sec... I'm curious to see what the most popular fetishes are here, so list your top 3 or 5 fetishes/kinks that you have (whether you've tried them yet or not)

Mine are:

Rope (bottoming)

Bondage of any sort (bottoming)

Head pets (receiving... Because cuddling is a fetish lol)

Impact play (bottoming)

Gags and Blindfolds (receiving)

And since we're on the topic and it's important to realize your limits, list your top 3 or 5 hard limits (things you never ever ever want to try)... Apart from the obvious and illegal bit three (necrophelia, bestiality, and pedophilia).

Mine are:

Needles

Humiliation

Cutting/blood play

Sex of any kind

Adult baby play

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Cali_Guy

Head pets (receiving... Because cuddling is a fetish lol)

Cuddling is a fetish :O Really :blush:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Master Ghost

Yeah, we call those people cuddle monsters though I think.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Cali_Guy

Yeah, we call those people cuddle monsters though I think.

Really wow :O A special one that I have in my life does that and more :D :blush:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ricki

Top 5 kinks:

- Tight clothing (latex/leather)

- Blindfolds and gags

- Collars

- Leather cuffs, much prefer that over rope or metal. I wouldn't say no to rope but depending on the knots then blood circulation becomes a factor that I would be constantly thinking about.

- (maybe a weird one) Being left for a small amount of time, even if the other person stays in the room.

5 No-no's;

- Sex

- Golden Showers/Scat

- Needles

- Cutting

- Photos

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lauren+Bear

- Leather cuffs, much prefer that over rope or metal. I wouldn't say no to rope but depending on the knots then blood circulation becomes a factor that I would be constantly thinking about.

Actually, this was something I planned to touch on eventually... Circulation isn't the main risk of rope bondage. It takes DAYS for a limb to actually die/fall off like most people fear. Is it comfortable to have the circulation cut off for long periods of time? Definitely not, but it isn't really a health risk for most scenes. The true risk of rope bondage is nerve damage. Not to scare you or anything, it's a fairly simple thing to recognize and prevent. If you ever feel partial numbness, pain, or tingling in your hand, arm, or foot, tell your top immediately. It's a sign that a nerve is being messed with. After you've become experienced with rope bottoming, you'll know where certain nerves in your body are that are susceptible. For me, I have a nerve an inch above my elbow that is close to the surface. I make sure to tell my top (new or old) about it every time I rope bottom so they know what area to stay away from.

Don't get me wrong, always tell your top if you're circulation is being cut off or the rope is pinching, but it's nothing to panic over. :-)

I love collars and cuffs, too. I like the weight of them. :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Ricki

Ah yeah, that makes sence. I just think that even knowing that it'd be running through my mind. Even if I would be completely unable to move, I'd still like to be relatively comfortable. And (in my incredibly limited experience) cuffs are nicer than rope ^_^ I know it also depends how the rope work is done and I wouldn't say no, but that thought has always made me dubious of it

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Feral_Sophisticate

Hmmmmmm... Let's talk kinks/fetishes for a sec... I'm curious to see what the most popular fetishes are here, so list your top 3 or 5 fetishes/kinks that you have (whether you've tried them yet or not)

Mine are:

Rope (bottoming)

Bondage of any sort (bottoming)

Head pets (receiving... Because cuddling is a fetish lol)

Impact play (bottoming)

Gags and Blindfolds (receiving)

And since we're on the topic and it's important to realize your limits, list your top 3 or 5 hard limits (things you never ever ever want to try)... Apart from the obvious and illegal bit three (necrophelia, bestiality, and pedophilia).

Mine are:

Needles

Humiliation

Cutting/blood play

Sex of any kind

Adult baby play

My top fetishes (I have to list more than 5, as I can't limit myself to just 5 - sorry)?

Age play

Bondage (giving, not receiving)

Gags (giving, not receiving)

Leather cuffs and chains (the contrast looks awesome, plus I use chain creatively, beyond as a bondage tool)

Victimization / Humiliation

Consensual non-consent

Power exchange

My top hard limits?

Anything scatalogical

Sexual scenes with men (I will - and have - dominated men nonsexually, as power exchange and humiliation are hot to me)

Anything done non-consensually

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
eeriesilence

Top Five:

Bondage/Rope Play (bottom)

Impact Play (bottom, maybe top)

Humiliation (receiving)

Erotic Asphyxiation (receiving)

Needles (Interested, haven't tried.)

Hard Limits:

Scat/Water Sports - most bodily fluids, tbh

Age Play

Recording/Pictures

Mirrors/Reflective Surfaces (being in the room, kinda weird I know)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Rochnariel

Top Five - All receiving. I'm a sub that has no desire to ever be on the giving side.

Bondage

Sensation Play

Wax

Power exchange

Cutting

Hard Limits:

Scat/Water Sports

Humiliation

Age Play

Anything Non-consensual

I'm glad you included hard limits, Lauren+Bear. I always see these with what's your kink, not your limits. And you need to know both.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wyrmcraft

As I haven't actually gotten to experiment, I can't really tell you what I am into or not. I don't really have the vocabulary, however, I can use way too many words to try and explain.

The one idea that really entices me is a slow shift of power. Both of us would start off equal, and then slowly over time someone takes control away from me. I'd fight back a little, from time to time, to keep them sharp or if I felt they were not exerting enough control. I love the idea of a slow creeping domination. Perhaps even over multiple sessions.

I'm personally more interested in sensual or sexual scenes with a close partner, probably because I'm a gray. Power over me is just too...precious to give away to anyone less, even if I want to. So I guess you could say:

Top Five Nine:

Whatever I just explained above (receiving)

Being a Sub in General

Cuddling (kind of a mutual activity)

Restraints (Either just me held down, or the idea of someone else held down giving me orders)

Blindfolds/Sensation (I can do top/bottom here)

Toys (If they count, one of the few situations I'm good being the top for and not so good at bottom)

Hair (I really like hair, touching it, petting it, running my hands through it till they get stuck, gently teasingly biting it, etc)

Sexy Outfits (Or classy ones, slow dress downs can be very appealing)

Occasionally being a top (I like mixing things up)

Guess I am more interested in the BnD and a little less of the SnM. I don't actually mind the ideas of whips or etc being included into other sorts of activity but they in and of themselves do not excite me since I'm kind of neutral to pain. Kind of like how the idea of just being stared at while naked is really humiliating and doesn't excite me, but the thought of a partner doing it on purpose to establish power does. For me it is all about that power, and whatever helps that exchange be achieved is generally something I'd at least be interested in trying. Of course the main problem is that, as said, I'm kind of looking to try this with someone close. I really value my control and I am not comfortable giving it away, at all. So I need someone to help me inspire that comfort.

Anyway, onto the nope list

Nope:

Needles

Cutting/Blood

Adult Baby

Other Men (Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope, sorry guys, but nope)

Consensual Non-consent (Top only, just no. Bottom I am fine with would probably enjoy.)

Non-consensual in general

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Master Ghost

My top five fetishes:

1. Anything involving a leash and collar.

2. Role play and dress up.

3. A little foot fetish.

4. Chains and/or cuffs.

5. Being tied to a bed.

6. Dominating other men or possibly some form of bisexual interaction.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guftders

I haven't really thought about my top 5 fetishes... I just figured I'd start with I'm NOT comfortable with and go from there. On that note, my NOPE list- Needles, Breath control, Fire (even with just candle wax), electricity, CBT, Other Men, Use of sharp implements to the effect of letting blood (that said, I MIGHT end up enjoying that if I was the bottom :unsure: ), age play, excreted matter (anything to do with poop or wee), non-consensual sex (if I'm the bottom). I think thats it really. Everything else is probably fine, I'd have to try it first.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lauren+Bear

Awesome guys! Keep 'em coming. :-) Anyone interested in electrical play? Because I have to say, scalp massages while electrified are THE BOMB!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Rochnariel

Hmmm... I've never given electricity too much thought before. Not sure how I think yet. I'll have to ponder this.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lauren+Bear

Hmmm... I've never given electricity too much thought before. Not sure how I think yet. I'll have to ponder this.

A lot of people think it's just shocks and painful stuff, but it can give you that staticky feeling that makes your hair stand up, too. It's pretty fun, but feels a little like a sunburn the day after.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Rochnariel

Hmmm... I've never given electricity too much thought before. Not sure how I think yet. I'll have to ponder this.

A lot of people think it's just shocks and painful stuff, but it can give you that staticky feeling that makes your hair stand up, too. It's pretty fun, but feels a little like a sunburn the day after.

Sounds like something I might like. I'm good with pain, but I like it more in conjunction with something else. Staticky, hair sticking up sounds fun. And I weirdly enjoy the sunburn feeling.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Feral_Sophisticate

Awesome guys! Keep 'em coming. :-) Anyone interested in electrical play? Because I have to say, scalp massages while electrified are THE BOMB!

Oooooh yesssss...

The violet wand puts my girl into a new level of subspace... And I get off on the squirming she does, while using it.

And I have conductive metallic claws that I use to run them over her body while using it.

Very yummy to watch, and do to her. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Schrecken

Some of this stuff for me is just conjectural interest at the moment, though I did finally get to experience a few of my interests this past Friday night for the first time (taking it from pure fantasy with no prior experience into reality, which was every bit as awesome as I expected it would be and more). The ones with the asterisk are the ones I have actually experienced.

So here goes for things I think I might be interested in experiencing (or have experienced and liked):

bondage (not really into any fancy rope stuff, just basically being tied or restrained)

being chased down and captured

*being submissive (not all the time in a relationship, just for play and scenes)

*being naked/made to strip

*specific kinds of impact play (experienced one kind, there are a couple more variants that I want to try soon)

*cuddling (wasn't sure I was really going to like this one IRL, but I got to experience it also on that Friday night and I really liked it)

Now if I could get the first one (the second is, from what I understand, kinda tough to do IRL, so that may always just remain a fantasy and that's OK) in with all the ones with the asterisk by them, that would be awesome!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Tessc

Speaking of FetLife, anyone got any funny experiences/messages from there?

I've just spent the past two days messaging a guy who wanted to know about my listing myself as asexual. Turns out I might have just explained his sexuality to him :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Feral_Sophisticate

Some of this stuff for me is just conjectural interest at the moment, though I did finally get to experience a few of my interests this past Friday night for the first time (taking it from pure fantasy with no prior experience into reality, which was every bit as awesome as I expected it would be and more). The ones with the asterisk are the ones I have actually experienced.

So here goes for things I think I might be interested in experiencing (or have experienced and liked):

bondage (not really into any fancy rope stuff, just basically being tied or restrained)

being chased down and captured

*being submissive (not all the time in a relationship, just for play and scenes)

*being naked/made to strip

*specific kinds of impact play (experienced one kind, there are a couple more variants that I want to try soon)

*cuddling (wasn't sure I was really going to like this one IRL, but I got to experience it also on that Friday night and I really liked it)

Now if I could get the first one (the second is, from what I understand, kinda tough to do IRL, so that may always just remain a fantasy and that's OK) in with all the ones with the asterisk by them, that would be awesome!

Pursuit and capture scenes are far easier to accommodate than you think. All it takes is time, opportunity, and a partner who you trust (yes, those three may be hard to arrange at once, but it can be done).

I even run a group for a "sub hunt" on FetLife, one that I took over earlier this year. I expect we will have our first such event in 2015.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
NiTeLight

This thread is awesome! :wub: I really hope we get our own subforum going. The discussion on here has been very interesting. It's nice to hear from some other kinky aces.

Kink is often so associated with sex, it's hard to find a way to express kink without sex and I've been enjoying hearing what other aces on here are interested in. As a switch, favoring the sub side of things...

My top 5 kinks are:

Belonging to someone (esp. collars and phrases like "you're mine" <-- said lovingly, not in a jealous-possessive way).

Being cared for (hair petting/brushing, feeding, bathing, etc.)

Bondage (my artistic side is definitely curious about shibari)

Sensation play

Blindfolds

My top 5 hard limits are:

Non-con (including consensual non-consent)

Bloodplay (needles, knives, etc.)

Golden showers/scat

Humiliation

Photos, videos, exhibitionism, etc.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Feral_Sophisticate

This thread is awesome! :wub: I really hope we get our own subforum going. The discussion on here has been very interesting. It's nice to hear from some other kinky aces.

Kink is often so associated with sex, it's hard to find a way to express kink without sex and I've been enjoying hearing what other aces on here are interested in. As a switch, favoring the sub side of things...

... and you might note that there are some sexuals (myself included) who don't automatically associate kink and sex, too.

That's one of the reasons why my ace pet/girl/little get along so well.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wyrmcraft

Belonging to someone (esp. collars and phrases like "you're mine" <-- said lovingly, not in a jealous-possessive way).

That is a very good way to summarize a lot of my kinks. :redface:

...if only I could find someone who could help with that :wub:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now