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Kink, BDSM, and Cake


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J. van Deijck

confession:

I thought I'd score even higher in both sadist and masochist

:ph34r:

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They seem to have got rid of "brat tamer" but kept "brat" which is... weird.

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J. van Deijck

true that :o I was surprised, especially when I saw the source of the test was exactly the same :D

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J. van Deijck

ooo one more 100% switch, I'm not alone now :D:D :3

I'm not really sure, for me the switch part is what I am, but also master, sadist, masochist, and

I do like some bondage and knife play.

 

I must admit that even several months ago I was terrified by the idea of doing anything BDSM related, but now I know I'm into it to some extent and I guess I have to live with it :D

it doesn't really have to be sexual, though. I'm not into sex either. :P

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J. van Deijck

also.

I'm a total slut when it comes to platonic feelings, I just love you all and I can't help it.

:wub: XD

 

*serious confession*

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42 minutes ago, MaybeIBelongSomewhere said:

So I guess I'm trying to say I appreciate this topic. Also to ask a question of the test takers: at what % do you guys personally not really pay attention to? Like things ranked 50% below or 30% below?

The first thing to remember is the test is only a guideline, the questions and answers aren't really specific enough for you to properly learn yourself, it's more a taster. This really means it's up to you to decide at what % to pay attention to. If you look at the category and you think "yeah I'm not really into that" then that's where you should start to ignore it :) 

You might have something at 20% but you like one or two aspects of it (maybe you hate "pet play", but love collars and leashes as a really loose example) but see another one that has 70%, but really hate some aspects of it (Such as you like age play, but you hate wearing diapers/nappies). 

Not sure if that helped or not :P 

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J. van Deijck
1 minute ago, Ricki said:

The first thing to remember is the test is only a guideline, the questions and answers aren't really specific enough for you to properly learn yourself, it's more a taster. This really means it's up to you to decide at what % to pay attention to. If you look at the category and you think "yeah I'm not really into that" then that's where you should start to ignore it :) 

You might have something at 20% but you like one or two aspects of it (maybe you hate "pet play", but love collars and leashes as a really loose example) but see another one that has 70%, but really hate some aspects of it (Such as you like age play, but you hate wearing diapers/nappies). 

Not sure if that helped or not :P 

this has helped me, though. :D

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1 hour ago, MaybeIBelongSomewhere said:

 

 

One thing I would never want is to truly hurt my partner so as long as we trust each other & he's honest and we use code words I could be into things like bondage and giving/receiving pain etc only if it's something he'd want too.

 

 

This is kind of how I feel. I never want to actually hurt anyone. Pain giving isn't really harmful to the person, if they like it. But, I'm very paranoid with such things and want to make 100% sure it's what the person truly wants and can stop it at any time, because I would feel absolutely awful if I even accidentally went too far with a person. 

 

My first BDSM partner, I was still really a kid (17-18). He was a switch and I was really inexperienced. We ended up doing a lot of stuff with no safe word. And I was so terrified for a lot of it. Especially stuff like flogging, whipping and sharp items such as pinwheels used to inflict pain. And especially when he was gagged and tied, cause I didn't have any signal for "stop" to listen to. So, it was a lot softer than he actually wanted, because I just didn't want to actually hurt him at all. 

 

I haven't really done much in that realm since. I'm not against it, some of it can be fun. But, I'd only do it again if all proper safety protocols were in place, rather than the childish experimenting (which, I think my partner at the time was mostly basing off pornography) that happened in the past without it.

 

1 hour ago, MaybeIBelongSomewhere said:

 

 

So I guess I'm trying to say I appreciate this topic. Also to ask a question of the test takers: at what % do you guys personally not really pay attention to? Like things ranked 50% below or 30% below?

 

-Thanks.

Uhm. I don't think it's really something to pay that much attention to, overall. But, things I was at 50% or over are things I kinda do/like for the most part. I actually prefer the will/want/won't lists to the tests like this.  Cause, I mean, I got 42% Daddy/Mommy ... but I don't think I'd ever really do that sort of play. 

 

Anyway, welcome to AVEN :cake: Thank you for opening up with us, even though you're not used to talking about this stuff. 

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J. van Deijck

yay. I'm not alone here :3

 

5 hours ago, Serran said:

I never want to actually hurt anyone. Pain giving isn't really harmful to the person, if they like it. But, I'm very paranoid with such things and want to make 100% sure it's what the person truly wants and can stop it at any time, because I would feel absolutely awful if I even accidentally went too far with a person. 

this is actually so relatable. :x

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J. van Deijck

now I must admit that the idea of being vulnerable to my bf is very appealing. :blush:

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TheFatDrake

*just sits here eating some :cake: wondering if anyone is into feederism/weight gain*

 

>_>

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2 hours ago, TheFatDrake said:

*just sits here eating some :cake: wondering if anyone is into feederism/weight gain*

 

>_>

The opposite- I'd rather be forced to/make someone go without food for an agreed length of time :ph34r:

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TheFatDrake
7 minutes ago, Just Me, Myself and I said:

The opposite- I'd rather be forced to/make someone go without food for an agreed length of time :ph34r:

Ooooh, you and I would not get along at all XD

 

OR, I could help you deny someone else of food by eating it all. P:

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J. van Deijck

honestly, me neither.

cw

I have an eating disorder.

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3 hours ago, TheFatDrake said:

*just sits here eating some :cake: wondering if anyone is into feederism/weight gain*

 

>_>

Not exactly.

 

food talk

Spoiler

I don't get off on people gaining weight, but on people eating. Gaining weight is not necessarily a turn off for me but it's not the end goal. I have literally no idea what this is called though? 

 

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J. van Deijck
34 minutes ago, MaybeIBelongSomewhere said:

@alpha decay I get that........ *Sending hugs*

💚

thank you! :blush: *hugs back*

I must admit I'm ashamed of it ._.

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1 hour ago, Just Me, Myself and I said:

The opposite- I'd rather be forced to/make someone go without food for an agreed length of time :ph34r:

Now that's an interesting one, that I don't think I've heard of before :o 

*kinda wants to try it*

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38 minutes ago, alpha decay said:

thank you! :blush: *hugs back*

 

Don't be. Honest- what's most important is loving yourself & realizing how amazing you are and having someone remind you how beautiful of a soul you have when you yourself forget 💚😢 Where you don't have to hurt yourself because nothing needs to be changed. You are perfect.

These are the times I literally wish I could send virtual hugs lol & this is coming from a touch averse girl 😳😋💚💚💚💚

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J. van Deijck
57 minutes ago, MaybeIBelongSomewhere said:

Don't be. Honest- what's most important is loving yourself & realizing how amazing you are and having someone remind you how beautiful of a soul you have when you yourself forget 💚😢 Where you don't have to hurt yourself because nothing needs to be changed. You are perfect.

These are the times I literally wish I could send virtual hugs lol & this is coming from a touch averse girl 😳😋💚💚💚💚

:blush: that's just nice of you :wub: and I appreciate it a lot :3

 

now I can just enjoy some cute things with my bf :D :3 if I wasn't half asleep xD 

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This is totes off topic, but I just wanna say I love how nice this thread is with the way everyone interacts and helps and stuff...

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J. van Deijck

I think the same. and we can talk safely about all these things :3

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TheFatDrake
16 hours ago, Kelpie said:

Not exactly.

 

food talk

  Hide contents

I don't get off on people gaining weight, but on people eating. Gaining weight is not necessarily a turn off for me but it's not the end goal. I have literally no idea what this is called though? 

 

You're in the same ballpark. I think that might fall under foodie in some respect.

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Jessica_Hellon

I love this post. I personally discovered asexuality through kink. I was looking to explore my kinks and ideas mre seriously about 18 months back and began attending munches in my area. I am currently a new pledge within a Leather patch club and slowly learning how to be a good Dominant with the intent to eventually enter into a D/s or M/s type dynamic. 

 

It was through some mentoring regarding pride groups and flags that I discovered asexuality as more than a word I knew nothing about. It was then I discovered what demisexual is and that there is a scale.

 

I am still finding where I might be on that scale. I haven't yet been able to separatewhat might actually be scale exalted attraction and what might just be my idea of sexual attraction since I have known nothing but a sexualized world and thought something was wrong with me. I have liked sex very rarely and yes I fantasize and masturbate but I'm unsure where my fantasy ends and real sexual attraction begins as the reality has almost always been off with exceptions I can count on 1 hand. 

 

So hello fellow kinksters! I hope you are well and I am excited to find out more about myself and others who don't feel that it all begins and/or ends with sex.

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J. van Deijck

hello @Jessica_Hellon! *waves* enjoy your stay :3

 

now there's a little confession, I'm in a mood for playing a little and all I'd need would be this:

M.373MT-C1_9.jpg

 

bladeplay-fixed-biohazard-zombie-surviva

 

il_570xN.312397672.jpg

 

and bondage trousers :3

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@Jessica_Hellon Welcome! :cake: You have a similar enough backstory to me :P I had a decent amount of experience with my kink, and looked it up specifically without sex, and found AVEN and the idea of asexuality! *high fives*

 

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So we all know about sadism-masochism which are most talked or known about.What are some of the bizarre fetishes you experience/have heard or known someone to have?? Though I am an asexual and don't like being touched , I would like to know about it so kindly share and enlighten.

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