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I think I might be asexual?


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Hi! I've been questioning a lot of things lately, and I'm kind of hoping to get some help. For a while I used to think that I was gay, and somewhat still do. I find guys to be attractive, but I'd never want to be with one sexually or romantically. I don't see myself as being romantic at all. I don't see myself getting married or dating anyone, and I'm completely fine with that. I think I might be asexual, but there's the problem of me finding men attractive and this is kind of confusing for me.

I was reading some of the forum posts and FAQ's, and they've definitely helped a little bit, but I still don't know/understand as well as I'd like.

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What kind of attraction are you talking about, is it only aesthetic?

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Pretty much, yeah. If I see a guy I find attractive my mind goes to "wow he's hot", and that's it. Not "wow he's hot get in my bed" or "wow he's hot marry me".

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As far as attractions go, I am one of those that believe that there is A LOT more to it than just sexual. Attraction can be of virtually any form, it's just that sexual tends to be the one that is emphasized socially.

Here's a handy little graphic to describe some of the other kinds of attractions. Take a look, take a ponder, and let us know what you think :)

sketchcomic___types_of_attraction_by_sec

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I used to think that I might be gay too, which I did not like because I just did not feel comfortable with that label at all. Other people at my school thought I was gay as well (because I had never dated and I also happened to like musicals, which is just totally jumping to the wrong conclusion), which really frustrated me because it just didn't feel right. I think I can appreciate good looking males just as often as I can appreciate good looking females, but I have very little interest in entering a romantic relationship with a male and absolutely no interest in doing anything sexual with one. Anyway I just wanted to say that you are definitely not alone in having questioned your sexuality because you felt something toward people of the same gender but it wasn't exactly the same thing that a completely gay or bi person might feel. Good day to you.

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The sketch graphic of different types of attractions is really helpful. : ) You can still be attracted to people aesthetically without having romance or sexual desire involved. There's a lot more romantic identities in between romantic and aromantic that perhaps you would fall under? But you can most definitely be asexual and be attracted to people (whether they are the same or different gender) in varying degrees. Keep looking around the site, and then hopefully you'll find what fits you!

P.S. Welcome to AVEN! :cake:

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