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Sexually Confused; Am I Asexual?


FightingIrish1298

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FightingIrish1298

I am a 20 year old guy who has, at least since I was about 14 or so, considered himself heterosexual. I am starting to question whether this is actually true though.
I am definitely aromantic. I have no urges to have a girlfriend (or boyfriend), I've never had one, and I don't want to get married or think about doing that. It's not a moral or philosophical opposition. It just doesn't feel "right" to me, if that makes sense. I have never had a romantic partner--friendships are more than enough for me (almost always friendships with other guys). I always considered myself heterosexual (sort of by default), aromantic.
Until I was about 14, I thought I may have been gay. I never had a sexual thought before then. Since I didn't like girls, I figured I had to be gay. Well, I finally felt some sort of attraction around 14, and it was about girls. That being said, I have no desire to actually have sex. I have had the desire, but it is not a prevalent factor for me. I don't go out of my way to pursue sex, it's not a priority. What exactly does this make me? I'm not huge into labels, just curious. Could I be gray-asexual? While I am attracted to women physically, I don't really think about sex with them. Sex hardly ever crosses my mind. In fact, when I have had sexual encounters, I often get uncomfortable and want to stop. This usually leads to awkwardness, but I can't help it.

So, could I be gray-asexual?
Thanks

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Welcome to AVEN!!! :cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake::cake:

Could be, important is that you know now if you are not into girls doesn't mean you are gay. :)

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Welcome to AVEN! :cake:

Take a look around the site, especially the Gray Area so you can read up more on gray-asexuality and demisexuality etc. to see if that's where you fit in! : ) That could be you! It takes some research to figure yourself out (sadly there's no easy way to identify oneself!) Best wishes! :cake:

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Member54880

Welcome! Here are a couple of threads to get you started exploring the gray-asexual label:

FAQ thread: http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/74042-grey-a-and-demisexual-faq-and-link-thread/
Thread of gray-asexuals sharing their experiences, why they identify as gray, and how it feels to them: http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/102063-how-does-gray-a-feel-to-you/

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FightingIrish1298

Thank you, everyone! I checked out the links, Aqua-ace. And I definitely identify with those things, so I consider myself to be gray-asexual. Is it possible to have "heterosexual leanings" along with gray asexuality?

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Yes, that is possible. The gray-area is a mix between asexuality and sexuality, so absolutely anything that doesn't fall directly into either category is in that in-between place. That includes occasional sexual attraction to the opposite sex. ^_^

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