Ethics and masturbation

[Syphon]

On the basis that it is impossible to prevent someone from thinking about me, I would just hope that they never EVER tell me.

[SquirrelCat]

Well.., when I masturbate to a real person (someone from a show on TV) I usually masturbate to the character they play rather than the person they are. It's not about the actor it's about the character.

I would feel a touch honoured if I found out someone masturbated thinking about me, weirded out, Yes. but still flattered.

[Enki]

I don't see it as unethical if the person wanted me to masturbate to them. As for someone doing it to with me in mind, if I liked them then it's a turn-on. Otherwise, yuck.

[Skycaptain]

Masturbation is, to me, a private matter. Unless the person involved is your partner don't tell people you fantasise over them whilst masturbating. By the same token if anyone was to say they fantasise about me whilst masturbating I would feel at best uncomfortable and more likely extremely nervous as to the individuals intentions.

[FiddleKid]

I would feel horrified if I found out someone was thinking of me like that and I never have masturbated

[PianoKeys]

Oh god, I've actually never even thought about that. Now I feel icky.

[lilackat]

When I've tried masturbating to actual people (who I know), I end up feeling icky. (I am autochoris.) My fantasies have to make sense contextually, and the idea of having sex with someone just doesn't make sense in that way. I think that I rationalized that as it feeling disrespectful, while in reality it just weirds me out.

The idea of someone masturbating to me doesn't necessarily feel disrespectful, it just grosses me out.

[Rising Sun]

Awkward, yes ; creepy, yes ; unethical, no. People don't have much control on their fantasies, but if they aren't in a relationship with the other person, it's best if they keep their fantasies for themselves.

[Prairie]

Didn't realize that someone awakened an old thread, but I already wrote a response before noticing, so...

Would you respect a person that masturbated to you?

It'd be no different than anything else a person might do in private that I might feel uncomfortable about. If some aspect was especially visible or seeped into how they treated me, I'd let them know how I felt and see whether they could hear me and accept that, perhaps they might offer to discontinue doing so, perhaps not. If they were defensive or dismissive, I'd probably not respect them. I don't see anything special about masturbation that is imposing; there's no magical force that they exert by using their perception of me as a catalyst for sexual pleasure.

I personally am disturbed when I am considered in a sexual way towards others, so someone visible masturbating to the perception of me would simply trigger that, so it would probably be uncomfortable just because it brings up these things I haven't yet resolved.

[Grumpy Alien]

My answer to both is *shrugs*

[allrightalready]

what someone does in the privacy of their home is none of my business

if someone does it in front of me and worse describes that i am a part of it i would most likely end up in prison

[nightroamer]

Ok, I can't resist responding to this.

No, nothing unethical about it, but I might be uncomfortable knowing about it.

Interestingly, I think my discomfort comes down to someone creating an unrealistic, fantasy version of me without my consent. If someone has some elaborate fantasy of us having sexytimes, my reaction is "ugh, I wouldn't do that; I hate that you think of me like that." Especially with some kind of degrading fantasy, which would make me uncomfortable, and which seems likely to affect our relationship.

But if someone was literally masturbating while thinking of me as I appear in public - just recalling how I looked as we were hanging out or I was walking by - then I am not uncomfortable. You're allowed to find me attractive and think about me, but not allowed to speculate wildly about my behaviors! :) (Of course, people are *allowed* to think whatever they want; they should just not let me know about what they were thinking!)

[Bazer63]

As long as they're not there, it's fine.

[Guest]

As long as they're not there, it's fine.

Unless they consent to being there.

[SkyWorld]

I feel like it would only be rude if one told them about it. "Hey, I think about you when I masturbate!" I mean, what they don't know can't hurt them. If someone thinks of me when they masturbate.... okay... just please for the love of all things holy do not tell me and leave me with my ignorance. If someone did it in front of me... I would run and hide. I've yet to be in a relationship, but even if I was in one, I wouldn't want them to tell me about that. I would most likely avoid them. I don't care who they are and what they do, all I care about is me being left alone with my blissful ignorance.

[chankun]

like it wouldn't bother me much if i had some sort of attraction/bond with this person before hand, like i don't want some creepy stranger thinking about me that way no

[fogsedge]

The phrase 'masterbate to' sounds like it involves an audience.

Do what you like. Please keep it to yourself. Above all, don't make me watch.

[Manic Pixie Dream Nerd]

Well, I don't think it has anything to do with ethics; that's kind of a big word to use.

I guess it's alright, though. People can think whatever they want. Personally, I'd feel super creepy doing it, like I was majorly disrespecting the person, so I never would. And my answer to the second question... ick, I wouldn't want to know. I'd be grossed out. But it's none of my buisness really, lol.

[Guest]

As far as I'm concerned, people can think about whatever they in the privacy of their own mind. If they want to think about me while wanking, go ahead, I couldn't care less. If I wanted to think about a specific person while masturbating (I don't) then I would do so with no shame at all. Just don't tell the object of your fantasies about it, because that would be creepy as hell (unless you are in a relationship with that person and they want to hear about it, of course :p ).

[jdwate]

Indifferent.

[Smoochynose]

I don't mind if someone has masturbated to me so long as I am unaware of the fact, however if they decided to inform me of that fact I would feel really uncomfortable. Their private fantasies is one thing, involving real-life me however crosses a line.

[Larien]

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