Peppermint Stick Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 Ha! Ha ha! So! I'm typing, and for once, I'm not nervous about posting (I'm really proud of that, actually)! So, Ace visibility and education projects. This was something that I could get behind, and the inspiration came from my grandfather. (He says that I should write a book about computers for teenage girls, as it's a male dominated field; I'm actually debating doing it) So, normally I sit around, and pound out a five page beginning of a fantasy [insert other genre here]. But my grandfather and mother got me thinking that maybe I should try my hand a non-fiction. I automatically refused, because, dull. Plus, more research. I'm against research on summer vacation. However, I started to think. From what I can tell, most Aces here seem confused and unsure of themselves in the Welcome Lounge (I am one of those people, don't misunderstand), and at the ripe old age of 17, I was thinking about how awful it was to be a teenager in a world where sex is the norm, and then not wanting sex. And I remember being really, really confused as to why everyone around me was starting to want sex when I didn't. This was in my Freshman year. As a rising Senior, I've figured this out. Now, being a teenager, I actually was freaking out over the whole thing (Why do I not want sex? What is wrong with me?), and I came across the term Asexual in a Fanfiction of all places. It was a word I had never heard of, so what do I do? I Googled it. Which led me here. Suddenly, things made a crap ton more sense (I was normal (sorta). There were others like me.). But, aside from my story, that's not why I'm posting here. I'm posting here because I'm writing a book for teens about what Asexuality is, what it really means, how it can affect relationships with others, and how other teenage Aces deal with it. However, I am asking for support. (Not monetary; never monetary.) Writing is hard. I get distracted easily. (Was that a butterfly? Oh, shiny!) So I ask for encouragement, and comments from my fellow teens. (You don't have to be Ace. I'd like it if our Sexual brethren wanted to add their input.) After dealing with a friends crisis over "I don't want sex, and I'm a freak!" I've come to the conclusion that I book for teens might actually help them understand that there is nothing wrong with not wanting sex. There is a word for that. You are not an alien. Link to post Share on other sites
Ravenessshadow Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 Hey!!! I am a teen going into high school in the fall & I really really love the idea of this book. It is defidently something I support. Link to post Share on other sites
GamerStacey Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 I'm technically not a teen anymore(I turned 20 last December), but I am completely behind this idea! I didn't discover that there was nothing wrong with me until I was 19, and if a book about asexuality will keep another kid from thinking they're broken, I'm all for it. ^-^ Link to post Share on other sites
LadyWallflower Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 I'm not a teen anymore, at 23. But I still remember my teenage years. I didn't figure out I was an ace till I was 22 (is that old). So I went through my entire teenage years not knowing, although I definitely knew something was different about me. I think this book could be useful! Maybe you could have some real stories about real asexual teens too, if pure nonfiction writing bores you. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Frigid Pink Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 I think that's a great idea! I'm not a teenager anymore, however, I certainly wish I had a resource like this around when I was. Link to post Share on other sites
crazypimpernelfan Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 I'm still a teenager and I was really hoping that somebody would start writing a book about this especially for teenagers! I was even thinking about writing one myself, but I still don't have a lot of knowledge about asexuality so I'm glad somebody's starting this! :D Once you have it published, I'm definitely buying a copy!! Link to post Share on other sites
phonic Posted June 12, 2014 Share Posted June 12, 2014 I actually figured out that I was asexual primarily through fanfiction, too. Funny how that works. (It's an accessible form of "literature" that you can tailor to specific interests.) Fun fact: Tumblr and Youtube user Swankivy has published a book about asexuality called The Invisible Orientation. Honestly not really my cup of tea, but it's there if you're interested. (Here's her overview video.) Have you thought about doing NaNoWriMo? (Camp NaNoWriMo runs in April and July.) It's a challenge to write 50,000 words in a month. Sounds hard, but the pressure to write ~1,667 words per day and the friendly competition with other people doing it are excellent motivators. I did it a couple of summers ago, and it was effective and satisfying. I'd encourage you to do a lot of research. Wiki pages, asexuality-related tumblogs (I assume you're familiar with tumblr), Youtube channels, anything you can get your hands on. The internet is the place where these otherwise invisible orientations thrive, and you'll find the most information here. If you'd like some links or something, feel free to hit me up. On a kind of different note -- I don't mean to discourage you from the prospect of non-fiction, but if your passions actually lie elsewhere: a fiction book that involves asexual characters as protagonists/otherwise prominent figures would also help aces feel less freakish. Part of feeling more normal is finding out that there are people like you, and having a relatable character could do that. (And good job on posting. ~) Link to post Share on other sites
littlepersonparadox Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 Outstadngly good idea. I had a similar experience to yours so doing this would be a lot helpful to more than just those around you. I didn't get why everyone was so hung up on sex ect. It get's weirder when you get a libido and it isn't aimed at anything. I just kinda felt alone but figured i would grow out of that. but when a libido shows up (and could not for the heck of me figure out what that was for almost a year) at it isn't amied at anything and you feel it when your asleep but there is nothing but darkness it freaks you out. I kicked my why don't i feel attracted to anything or anyone fears into high gear. especially since i didn't know about asexuality back then. The notion that a fictional book can work too. one of the most supportive stories i have read in the past year was fictional. It's now a book in the process of being published instead of only being online, and the guy who wrote it got over 5,000 british pounds on a kickstarter to do a squeal that is now in the works so it could be a good way to acheave the same goal of supporting young aces. Link to post Share on other sites
Peppermint Stick Posted June 13, 2014 Author Share Posted June 13, 2014 I'm trying to do fiction as well, get more stuff out there (wouldn't it be nice if I could find an Asexual romance novel? That'd be cool - no sex.) I just ended up doing both. Writing fiction is a passion, but if I could help teens by doing some non-fiction as well, that'd be amazing. Link to post Share on other sites
crazypimpernelfan Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 I'm actually reading a fictional novel right now which is about an asexual, but sadly enough it hasn't gained much attention. I hope asexuality is recognized much more than it already is soon. Link to post Share on other sites
Manic Pixie Dream Nerd Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 Yes, that's an awesome idea! I would definitely read it and recommend it to my friends so they could learn more about asexuality! Make sure you tell us the title when it get published! :) Link to post Share on other sites
deltaX Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 I like this idea a lot! I didn't even know asexuality existed until earlier this year, when I was 19, so anything that gets the word out to teens so they can discover themselves sooner and avoid the confusion I've faced makes me happy! :D If you do end up writing the book and get it published, be sure to tell everyone on aven know, I'm sure a lot of us (including me) would be interested in reading it! Link to post Share on other sites
I'd rather be in band. Posted June 13, 2014 Share Posted June 13, 2014 It's a wonderful idea! I think that, in the book, you should clarify a lot of things. Many people that aren't as educated about sexualities other than heterosexuality don't quite understand the concept of romantic orientation. While this isn't necessarily specific to asexuality, I think that it should be addressed in depth because many people don't understand that there are many romantic asexuals. Although I fall on the aromantic spectrum myself, I definitely dislike having to explain that asexuals are not necessarily aromantic. However, you should write about whatever you want; it's your book, and you can choose to elaborate upon anything that you please. :) Link to post Share on other sites
Aworld Posted June 14, 2014 Share Posted June 14, 2014 Such a great idea! As a late teen, I would have loved a book like this to let me know that asexuality is a thing and I'm not alone. It's that awful age where you don't want to talk to anyone about it and keep trying to persuade yourself that you're a late bloomer. And this book won't only be great for aces, but also others who can now properly understand asexuality and hopefully won't have all those misconceptions. Link to post Share on other sites
swankivy Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 A book just for teens would be great. ;) I do have a few sections in my book that address being a teen and being asexual, but the book isn't entirely focused on it. Here's where I mention it: In the "Asexual Experience" chapter I mention young aces and the prejudices they deal with. In the misconceptions-related chapter I thoroughly dispel the notion that asexuality is always to be understood as a phase or an attention-seeking behavior. In the "If You're Asexual (Or Think You Might Be)" chapter I have a section on the "late bloomer" concept and how to deal with it if parents or older adults are being condescending or dismissive. In the "If Someone You Know is Asexual (Or Might Be)" chapter I explain why parents/older people shouldn't invalidate their kids/younger acquaintances. It's definitely not comprehensive, and it's been a while since I was a teen, so it's not from a specifically teen perspective or just for teen audiences. ;) Link to post Share on other sites
NiTeLight Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 I love this idea! Thank you for doing it. You're welcome to PM me if you'd like help. :D While a factual rundown will certainly be helpful, I think the main focus (maybe 3/4 of the book?) should be on the more practical effects and aspects: how it affects relationships, how to come out (and stop doubt), how to support people who are ace, ways to compromise (including ways to be intimate enough to satisfy a sexual's need without having sex), discrimination, how/when to introduce the concept when entering a relationship, etc. Basically a "So you're asexual... now what does that really mean for your life" type of thing. To be honest, I think this sort of book will be helpful regardless of age, as these are questions and problems every ace faces. (That being said, it might be nice to have a "teen aces" and a "older aces" which cover issues specific to those age groups). My only other suggestion is to focus on asexuality being 70 million or so individuals, rather than 1%. You can state both statistics, but the numerical value just feels less alone. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Kelly Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 Excellent idea, Peppermint. I did not stumble across AVEN until I was in my mid-40s. It would have been cool to know that there wer others like me when I was younger. :) And swankivy, as usual, you are awesome. It looks like you book is scheduled to be released soon. *awaits* *gives :vis: for visibility* Link to post Share on other sites
oregonlily Posted June 17, 2014 Share Posted June 17, 2014 I love this idea too Peppermint! I'm glad there are other writers out there who want to adress being asexual in their writing. I have also been toying with the idea of writing a story featuring asexuality as the main topic. However mine would be fictional and feature two main characters; one asexual and the other transgender. I got some good ideas this morning, so I may start writing it today... Link to post Share on other sites
lunyrain Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Yet, another teen who would really love to see this come to fruition. I've been trying to write something with a asexual main character, but all my ideas have been falling flat as of late. I rarely write nonfiction or anything that isn't fantasy, scifi, or horror, really, but a challenge is always refreshing. Sexuality is definitely such an important thing to discuss. If you need any help I would be more than willing :) Link to post Share on other sites
WhoNeedsLabels? Posted July 7, 2014 Share Posted July 7, 2014 I think this is a great idea! I fully understand how easy it is to go off something you're writing or get writer's block, so if you need to talk about plot points or characters I'm more than happy to help. Link to post Share on other sites
SDBookFan Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 I've actually been tossing around an idea for an urban fantasy novel that is centered around an asexual character realizing her sexuality. Link to post Share on other sites
marararara Posted July 12, 2014 Share Posted July 12, 2014 Jumping on the bandwagon: I've also been thinking about writing a book about an asexual character. One of the characters in the novel I'm writing at the moment (for Camp NaNoWriMo, which , as has already been mentioned, is a brilliant motivator for anyone who's slow off the bat like me) I like to think of as asexual, although she's a relatively minor character so it's hard to get that across. But I'm also thinking that, since the other novel I've been playing around with a little already has a same-sex couple, why not make the fairy in the relationship asexual? I mean, what better way of making people feel positive about their orientation than to introduce the idea of it through the medium of a cute fairy girl? But anyway, I love the idea! I'm always trying to get my hands on any bit of ace-related literature that I can, so I'm super-stoked for absolutely anything -- especially a bit of nonfic because, honestly there is not enough information out there, either for people just finding their way or for people who want to understand the science of asexuality and the philosophy behind it as well. So yeah. Feel free to PM me if you need a hand with anything and /tell me when it comes out/ because I will be so excited! Link to post Share on other sites
Agent Shade Posted August 27, 2014 Share Posted August 27, 2014 I think you could go for something like this! There are non fiction asexuality books out there, but they're mostly aimed at adults. It's great you want to write one for teens! I am one of the youngest people on this site; I'm turning 15 next month. It was actually my twin brother who brought up the concept of asexuality (I don't know how he discovered it. Maybe I'll ask.), years ago (he's asexual aromantic) and at first I didn't buy that asexuality was a thing, but over a few months I kept thinking about it, and then it dawned on me in 8th grade that I was ace too. Truth be told, I had is easy compared to a lot of asexuals, and I wish it were easy for everyone, which this book you're writing can achieve. Link to post Share on other sites
Skipper Valvoline Posted August 29, 2014 Share Posted August 29, 2014 You should totally do it! That would be awesome and so helpful for so many people! After all, it's the teens who have to suffer through sex ed and jazz... yeah. Even though I already know I'm ace, I would still totally read it. That would be an epic book. :D Link to post Share on other sites
Peppermint Stick Posted October 2, 2014 Author Share Posted October 2, 2014 Goodness, you all are very supportive of this! Yeah, so lots of you seem to be excited about the Teen bit. I actually went looking for books on the topic, and you're right, there's next to nothing for teens who are trying to figure it out. I didn't think that was fair, as teens seem to be the ones that actually have to figure things out. We deserve literature that explains things to us, in such a way that we're not bored to tears. Link to post Share on other sites
GingerbreadGirl Posted October 5, 2014 Share Posted October 5, 2014 This sounds like an awesome idea!! Personally, nothing has been more therapeutic and reassuring than combing through AVEN posts and taking in the information and the voices of all the people here. (I'm a natural born lurker) I am 1200% behind an Ace book for teens, I'm already excited about this!! Link to post Share on other sites
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