Incredible Aromantic Moments (other romantic orientations invited)

[I'd rather be in band.]

Valentine's Day.

Everyone obsessed over it, and I was just angry because my cardiologist ordered me not to ever eat chocolate again because of the medication I'm on. Dang.

[EggplantWitch]

Nice thread! I love the Ace Moments thread, knew I had to post in this one too.

A recent demiromantic realisation: I am completely incapable of writing a "romance" story (which is to say, a story about cool stuff happening that has a couple of characters hook up at some point as a kind of side-dish) without giving it a huge build up where they become great friends first, which is my favourite part. When I was younger and more amatonormative and tried to write actual romance stories, I'd always power through the 'strangers becoming best friends' parts and then get bored and stop writing when they started acting romantic! I get around that now by having all the characters whose romances I focus on being on the aro scale and definitely on the ace :D

Is an aromantic moment that I'm more excited for an awesome hangout with friends than some couples are for spending the day with their significant other? :P

Inspired by the good aromantic people of AVEN I was going to host an online Cards Against Humanity party with all my single friends and got really excited about it, but then I had a small anxiety attack and had to cancel :( NEXT YEAR FOR SURE. NEXT YEAR I WILL GET MY ARO MOMENT.

[SithLord]

Since I'm not aro I don't know if this is the appropriate thread but it's about romance and not sex so I think it might be?

When I was a freshman in high school I had a squish on a dude in my classes. When my group of friends asked everyone around who we were all crushing on I said him, because why not? Turned out another chick (friend of a friend who I now hate) had a crush on him, and she started disliking me because of it.

I don't understand why that's a big deal? Aren't two people allowed to like the same person?

[SithLord]

Him ( ): What are you thinking about?

Me: Thermodynamics.

Him:

I know this is an old post so it's weird to quote it, but I just thought that it's even more off-putting when you tell them you're pairing male characters in a fictional universe in your mind (crack yaoi pairings). That mostly gets them to not ask me anymore. : P

[Iyck]

Recently I met a friend of mine for her birthday. She is single so a two women who are in relationships just started speculating about who they could set her up with and went on about random guys they know. I found the conversation frustrating and I didn't feel comfortable sharing my point of view so I was happy when it was over. My friend seemed relieved as well.

[deltaX]

Recently I met a friend of mine for her birthday. She is single so a two women who are in relationships just started speculating about who they could set her up with and went on about random guys they know. I found the conversation frustrating and I didn't feel comfortable sharing my point of view so I was happy when it was over. My friend seemed relieved as well.

I absolutely hate those conversations, especially when I'm on the receiving end. Just because I'm single doesn't mean I am dying to be set up with someone

[Sea-Breeze]

When I was seven years old and coming home from school this boy from the other class told me that he loves me. I was completely horrified by this and probably even ran away from him. When my mom came home she found me crying and asked what was wrong and I told her that this boy had told me that he loves me. I had never even talked to him.

Once I managed to play a dating sim game without actually dating anyone. (This one: http://www.luckyrabbitreflex.com/) I mean how was

I supposed to know that if you for example wanted to date the sporty guy, you would have to go to the gym everyday and join the athletic club. You have homework (in the game)? Doesn't matter, just go to the gym already, IF you want the "good ending". If I had had a physical copy of that game, I would have probably thrown it to the other side of the room at the end of the game. I just wanted to have well rounded school life in that game and be nice to everyone...

Also that "guy asking my phone number and I don't realize at the moment that he wants it because he might be romantically interested me and I just give it to him not really thinking about it too much at the time" has happened to me once. Boy did I regret it later that week when he called me every single day of that week (and he didn't even have anything important to say to me, just boring yada yada). Then I ignored him and as a result got a bunch of angry texts for not answering and I had to ask my cousin for help how to get rid of him via text. Well, I'm not giving my phone number to just anyone anymore. At least I learned something out of it. -_-'

Edited February 23, 2015 by Sea-Breeze

[deltaX]

Also that "guy asking my phone number and I don't realize at the moment that he wants it because he might be romantically interested me and I just give it to him not really thinking about it too much at the time" has happened to me once. Boy did I regret it later that week when he called me every single day of that week (and he didn't even have anything important to say to me, just boring yada yada). Then I ignored him and as a result got a bunch of angry texts for not answering and I had to ask my cousin for help how to get rid of him via text. Well, not giving my phone number to just anyone anymore. At least I learned something out of it. -_-'

I have the opposite problem; I'm always worried about asking people for their phone numbers, even if I legitimately need it, precisely because I'm worried people will think I'm flirting with them or something. It can be kind of awkward when you've been friends with a guy for over a year and still don't have his phone number to text him because you're too embarrassed to ask him for it.

[EatPotato]

I am an aromantic who plays dating sims. Need I say more?

[Miav-desu]

Friend: I want to go on a date

Me: I am not sure about that

Friend: I will buy you pizza

Me: what kind of pizza?

Friend: you decide

Me: okay but what do you do on a date?

Friend: you are together and watch movie and well eat pizza

Me: can we watch Xmen?

Friend sure:

Me: cool I invite ____ as well

Friend: NO! you can't invite ___!! its suposed to be a date!

--

[Miav-desu]

Friend: well could you go on a date with me?

me: huh? a date.. I don't know.... *seach google* "what dose date mean?"

google text: "good places to go date, go to ___ street, go shooping, sit at a cafe together bla bla bla.

me: I think we already had a date?

Friend: ????????

----------------------------------

Friend post picture of him kissing his lover on facebook all comments are like:

"oh you are so sweet together" "you are so lucky" "so cool picture of you 2"

me: "are you wearing black pants or are they just very dark blue ?"

[Dodecahedron314]

That moment when you realize some love songs make a lot more sense if you apply them to really wanting to get into a certain college or something. Or maybe that's just me being a complete and utter nerd more than anything. (my personal examples: MIT: Driven By You (Brian May), University of Chicago: Why Don't You And I (Santana ft. Chad Kroger, or is it the other way around? It's on a random Santana CD I have))

[deltaX]

That moment when you realize some love songs make a lot more sense if you apply them to really wanting to get into a certain college or something. Or maybe that's just me being a complete and utter nerd more than anything. (my personal examples: MIT: Driven By You (Brian May), University of Chicago: Why Don't You And I (Santana ft. Chad Kroger, or is it the other way around? It's on a random Santana CD I have))

I usually interpret love songs as songs about close friendships. Even before I realized I was aro I could relate to a lot of love songs because I would just picture myself singing it to one of my friends.

Applying to college is also a fun way to interpret them too though :)

[SithLord]

When I was seven years old and coming home from school this boy from the other class told me that he loves me. I was completely horrified by this and probably even ran away from him. When my mom came home she found me crying and asked what was wrong and I told her that this boy had told me that he loves me. I had never even talked to him.

Once I managed to play a dating sim game without actually dating anyone. (This one: http://www.luckyrabbitreflex.com/) I mean how was

I supposed to know that if you for example wanted to date the sporty guy, you would have to go to the gym everyday and join the athletic club. You have homework (in the game)? Doesn't matter, just go to the gym already, IF you want the "good ending". If I had had a physical copy of that game, I would have probably thrown it to the other side of the room at the end of the game. I just wanted to have well rounded school life in that game and be nice to everyone...

Also that "guy asking my phone number and I don't realize at the moment that he wants it because he might be romantically interested me and I just give it to him not really thinking about it too much at the time" has happened to me once. Boy did I regret it later that week when he called me every single day of that week (and he didn't even have anything important to say to me, just boring yada yada). Then I ignored him and as a result got a bunch of angry texts for not answering and I had to ask my cousin for help how to get rid of him via text. Well, I'm not giving my phone number to just anyone anymore. At least I learned something out of it. -_-'

There's this sorta mystery dating sim game I have that has like 10 endings. One each for if you romance a guy and one if you don't, and then another five if you solved the mystery and if you solved it while involved with a guy or not.

I managed to do both endings of not ending up with a guy first because I always prioritized the mystery, because that's way more fun than dating.

[Dethsdream]

I buy myself an expensive box of chocolates every valentines day. Apparently this is weird (at least, so I've been told by family and friends). But I love myself, so it makes sense, right?

Apparently I don't understand the fundamental concept of valentines day.

[deltaX]

I buy myself an expensive box of chocolates every valentines day. Apparently this is weird (at least, so I've been told by family and friends). But I love myself, so it makes sense, right?

Apparently I don't understand the fundamental concept of valentines day.

To me, Valentine's day is just a holiday for celebrating love- whether that love is romantic or sexual or platonic or familial or whatever. If you love yourself, then why not treat yourself to a box of chocolates? I think its a nice way to celebrate :)

[NorthofSummer]

So I'm listening to this friend talk about how much relationship drama they've had. Somehow I always wind up on the receiving end of this rant, exactly how I'll never know.

Them: "This year has just been drama. I bet you know all about that, though, right?"

Me: "Not really, no."

Them: *awkward silence*

Some variant of this happens every. Single. Time. I need to get better at avoiding that conversation.

[Sockstealingnome]

I buy myself an expensive box of chocolates every valentines day. Apparently this is weird (at least, so I've been told by family and friends). But I love myself, so it makes sense, right?

Apparently I don't understand the fundamental concept of valentines day.

Valentine's Day is a retail holiday. You celebrated it right.

[SithLord]

I buy myself an expensive box of chocolates every valentines day. Apparently this is weird (at least, so I've been told by family and friends). But I love myself, so it makes sense, right?

Apparently I don't understand the fundamental concept of valentines day.

That would be normal among my group of high school friends.

We were all single all the time so just called it Single's Awareness Day and bought ourselves chocolate.

[Dodecahedron314]

For clarinet choir this year, we're playing Holst's Second Suite in F--specifically, the second and fourth movements, "Song Without Words (I'll Love My Love)" and "Fantasia on the Dargason", respectively. Well, the second movement has exactly two dynamic markings: piano and pianissimo (for non-musicians: there are two volumes written in the piece, and those are quiet and quieter). However, that's obviously relative within the piece, because if everything's either quiet or even quieter, it's boring. When my friend who was conducting told us this, she said "Come on, the song is called "I'll Love My Love", this is a love song, it's supposed to be passionate and emotional, so play it that way!" or something to that effect. Now, it's worth mentioning here that I've had a cough since last week, because as soon as she said that, I *coincidentally* just happened to have a massive coughing fit, and my friend who was sitting next to me said "Oh no, you're allergic to love!" I just laughed, thought "you don't even know how right you are", coughed some more, and by then we were about to start playing again. The funny thing is, he doesn't even know I'm aro (though I've picked up on some little things suggesting he might well be ace and/or aro himself).

[realm96]

I'm not sure if this counts as an aro moment or not but I only recently realized that one of my best friends has had a crush on me for like a year. Apparently he spent months dropping hints that I never picked up on. I didn't realize any of this until he kissed me in order to be more direct because he couldn't think of any other way to get my attention.

[Liriam]

Incredible aro moment: when i was little (6? 4?) My parents made me watch princess movies and I was always like BLEHHHHH I never understood one of them. They just met! Hes super mean! I dont like this princess, the prince did all the work and she gets the happy ending?! She literally did nothing and just waited to be rescued! And then she got married! and the movie ended! Is her life over now?! How boring and terrifying, only Mulan did something awesome

I still think the same thou

[Sockstealingnome]

I'm not sure if this counts as an aro moment or not but I only recently realized that one of my best friends has had a crush on me for like a year. Apparently he spent months dropping hints that I never picked up on. I didn't realize any of this until he kissed me in order to be more direct because he couldn't think of any other way to get my attention.

That must have been awkward. How did you respond?

[brightberry]

I'm always really confused when people get into a relationship just to be in a relationship. Would it kill you to wait and find someone so you'd have a good relationship with a chance of success?

[realm96]

I'm not sure if this counts as an aro moment or not but I only recently realized that one of my best friends has had a crush on me for like a year. Apparently he spent months dropping hints that I never picked up on. I didn't realize any of this until he kissed me in order to be more direct because he couldn't think of any other way to get my attention.

That must have been awkward. How did you respond?

At first I didn't really do anything but like the next day I started avoiding him for a really long time, like he kissed me right before our high school graduation and I didn't really interact with him at all over the following summer. Eventually we figured stuff out and now we're back to being really good friends. Granted 90% of people we both know are still convinced we're secretly dating (I think one of my sisters is shipping us... *shudders*) but we're cool now.

[realm96]

I'm always really confused when people get into a relationship just to be in a relationship. Would it kill you to wait and find someone so you'd have a good relationship with a chance of success?

I think it depends on what each person considers to be a success. Some people get into relationships because they think they're fun. Others people just want the status that comes with it. Not everyone looks for long term in a relationship. I've had a few relationships and I know I've never wanted anything close to long term, I mean, even short term really freaks me out.

[Perseus]

Incredible aromantic moments- Watching "Fifty shades of grey", finding out Ana is aromantic, and the movie as a whole was pointless to people who are aromatic and "don't do romance". Christian Grey said it right.

[jimerman]

my best friend seems to have a girlfriend of the week, and when i bring up his fruitless endeavors he said "well at least i am getting some unlike you" i don't know how we have been friends for over 15 years and he still hasn't picked up on the fact that i just don't care.

[SidesSeer]

Kay, I'm starting to wonder if I'm on the aro spectrum with guys along with being hetero-demi. Might post a separate angst fest about that later.

ANYWAY!!! I was just chatting with one of my best male friends and he was saying how he has a hard time attracting girls. I wanted to give him some advice (I.E., maybe tell him what's worked on me), ... and then ... I was like, "Wait, what would work on me?" ... "Um..." (blink blink!)

Then, I was reading the lyrics to "How You Get The Girl" by Taylor Swift and going, "No! If a guy tried this stuff with me I'd run in the opposite direction!" LOL!

[Sockstealingnome]

I work in retail and there was a male customer in the store the other day standing around holding a bathroom scale for the longest time. I couldn't figure out if he had paid for it yet so when he walked out of the store with it, I thought we had another shoplifter on our hands.

Coworker 1: Hey, do you see that guy over there?

Me: Yeah! I'm not sure if he paid yet.

Coworker 1: No, girl, he fiinnnne. OOH. Some chocolate right there.

Me: That's what you wanted to talk to me about?

Coworker 2: You like yourself some milk chocolate?

Me: Does nobody else care if he's a thief?

P.S. Turns out he paid.