maila Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Hi I am new to this forum. Before today i never knew what asexaulity was but i am glad i found out. You dont know how much I am at peace right now. But the funny thing was that i always knew something wasnt right with me. I knew that my sexual feelings werent normal at all for i only felt almsot no arousal and the arousal i did feel was kind of forced. I thought to myself that this cant be or that something was wrong with my body. You see, i feel little or no sexual arousal whenever i attempted to masturbate a few times. Dont get me wrong i have been attracted to many guys before but it wasnt "i want to have sex with you" kind of attraction. Often i have tried to pretend i was normal and force myself to have sexual feelings but it didnt really work. I was very frustated and i thought up all kinds of theories. I thought that i may have been gay because i wasnt that aroused by guys and that i was supressing my attraction for girls. I thought that something may be wrong with my genitals physically and that is the reason why i could not get aroused. But my main theory was that i am sexually repressed. Now the last theory i am really trying to follow up on. You see, when i was little i was sexually molested. Whether or not this affect my sexuality today i dont know but it probably does. Whether i am really this way because it is who i am, or because i am just sexually repressed i dont know. I was wondering is there anyone in here who thinks they are asexual because of some traumatic experience in their lives, or are you guys just simply that way?? Could I still be classified as asexual even though there is a chance that i might not be this way had that not happened to me when i was little?? I have heard of people who have suddnely "turned gay" because they were molested when they were younger or because they were in prison. Do you think that could be the case with me and asexuality? Link to post Share on other sites
Cate Perfect Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 My personal opinion is that it doesn't matter one jot WHY you are the way you are as long as you're happy with yourself and your life. Even if you could be certain of a 'cause' it wouldn't matter. It would change who you are. So if your uninterested in sex then you're asexual in my book! Welcome! :D Cate Link to post Share on other sites
maila Posted October 15, 2004 Author Share Posted October 15, 2004 My personal opinion is that it doesn't matter one jot WHY you are the way you are as long as you're happy with yourself and your life. Even if you could be certain of a 'cause' it wouldn't matter. It would change who you are. So if your uninterested in sex then you're asexual in my book!Welcome! :D Cate Thank you. :D I am starting to feel at home already. I have been reading some of the posts here and i already feel i have alot in common with the members, and not just because of my asexuality. Link to post Share on other sites
Cate Perfect Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Great! :D Just wait until everyone else wakes up and comes on to welcome the daylights out of you! Cate Link to post Share on other sites
Vicious Trollop Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Welcome to AVEN! I'm going to have some for breakfast, would you like to pull up a fork? I completely agree with Cate -- totally search for answers if it helps, but ultimately what's important is that you feel comfortable with who you are. There's definitely nothing wrong with any of your feelings. I'm glad you found us! :) Link to post Share on other sites
Kombucha2000 Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 I was wondering is there anyone in here who thinks they are asexual because of some traumatic experience in their lives, or are you guys just simply that way?? Could I still be classified as asexual even though there is a chance that i might not be this way had that not happened to me when i was little?? we have a diversity of people here, some did experience abuse, some did not. I guess it's on an individual basis. Sure you can call yourself asexual. A lot of people here believe that sexuality is fluid and can change over time. You can certainly call yourself asexual and maybe down the road realize you're sexual or you'll stay asexual. Welcome to AVEN, maila! Stick around and have some btw, I like your avatar. My wallpapers a collage and I have that pic in it :) Link to post Share on other sites
Shockwave Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Hello and welcome to AVEN. Link to post Share on other sites
alexparker Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Hi there. Welcome to AVEN! !!! Link to post Share on other sites
junie99 Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Welcome to AVEN! Link to post Share on other sites
Kensington Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 Welcome! Just from reading your intro I can tell you have a lot in common with a bunch of people here. I guess there isn't really any way you can know for sure whether being abused as a child 'made' you this way or if it was even a factor at all. As Cate said, as long as you're happy with who you are then you probably shouldn't worry too much about why you are that way. :D Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 15, 2004 Share Posted October 15, 2004 *shakes your hand* Welcome aboard! Link to post Share on other sites
maila Posted October 16, 2004 Author Share Posted October 16, 2004 thanks guys! :P I have never gotton so many welcomes before. Wow your avatars are really, awesome I love them! Tell me where i can find some cool like that. Link to post Share on other sites
maila Posted October 16, 2004 Author Share Posted October 16, 2004 I was wondering is there anyone in here who thinks they are asexual because of some traumatic experience in their lives, or are you guys just simply that way?? Could I still be classified as asexual even though there is a chance that i might not be this way had that not happened to me when i was little?? we have a diversity of people here, some did experience abuse, some did not. I guess it's on an individual basis. Sure you can call yourself asexual. A lot of people here believe that sexuality is fluid and can change over time. You can certainly call yourself asexual and maybe down the road realize you're sexual or you'll stay asexual. Welcome to AVEN, maila! Stick around and have some btw, I like your avatar. My wallpapers a collage and I have that pic in it :) thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
Silly Green Monkey Posted October 16, 2004 Share Posted October 16, 2004 Welcome to AVEN! Link to post Share on other sites
-V- Posted October 16, 2004 Share Posted October 16, 2004 I probably know exactly how at peace you feel. I just found this place on the 13th and its made life so much better just to know I'm some human oddity, that I'm not alone. Thanks so much just for existing. Link to post Share on other sites
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