"Causes" for Asexuality

[The A Life Team]

Hey everyone,

In this episode, the panel returns to the question of legitimacy by tackling some of the more popular notions behind the possible causes for Asexuality. Not surprisingly, the conclusions are pretty devastating for the skeptics. In the process, the panelists learn the true nature of elevator music and realize that sometimes they just put out a really stinker of a show.

(We hope you're amused by it anyway.)

~The A Life Team

[Sabriel]

I picked: 'Meh, I like it some days, but there are some days when I just wish I was like everyone else- sexual.' However, at the times when I'm not happy with my sexuality, I'm much more likely to wish that everyone else was asexual like me! I'm mostly happy though, but not enough to pick the first option.

[CrazyCatLover]

Well, I'm not sure I would go as far as "awesome," but I'm happy with myself and don't really want to be sexual.

[Matt]

'I don't have an answer but I like answering polls!'

None of the answers really fitted me, so I picked that one because it's funny.

I can't really say I'm 'happy' as an asexual, but I'm not unhappy either. Asexuality 'fits' me and my personality, so it feels more 'comfortable' than 'awesome'. I don't really have any desire to be sexual though, because since I'm an shy aromantic loner, the only reason for me to want to be sexual would literally be to have sex, but given all the intimacy and relationship stuff that would be needed, and the fact that as I am sex isn't interesting, it doesn't seem worth it

[Guest member25959]

I am happy being an aromantic Asexual, I wouldn't change it for the world.

Yay for Asexual pride

[Starred]

I clicked the "Meh" one, but I think it's more so what Sabriel was getting at rather than wishing -I- was sexual.

I'm comfy with my sexuality and wouldn't change it, but it's a lonely path to take.

[annwyl_cariad]

Hee! You read my post! For the record, the username is (probably horrifically mangled) Welsh, and is pronounced roughly like "ahn-OO-eel CAR-ee-yahd". But if any of y'all quote me in the future you can just call me Ann, if that's easier. :P Oh, and I did it again. Listening to this in public. Disregarded my own advice, and started chuckling at some of your banter near the beginning while I was sitting waiting for class to start. Fail. Henrik, you rocked the elevator music. And don't get down on yourselves, I liked the show this week. It was a good topic to tackle.

So now, to respond to the actual issues in your podcast this week. XD You talked about whether aces question their sexuality as much as other sexual minorities. My experience is this: when I discovered the word "asexual," I think that at least a part of me immediately knew that hey, this is me. This was about a year and a half or so before I started identifying as ace...at the time, I was identifying as bisexual. But I discovered the term on a pretty sexual forum. As in, it was a forum about relationship advice, and I got called "asexual" almost as an insult because they found out I was a virgin who didn't vigorously pursue sex. It was said as though being asexual meant I was unqualified to give relationship advice like "don't let your partner abuse you just because he/she's hot." So I kind of shunned the term at first. I also got the impression that asexual meant asexual-aromantic. And I'm panromantic, so I thought, no, I can't be asexual.

Then a long time later, I found AVEN, and got a proper definition of asexuality, and then I really knew that this was me. For a while I was in denial about it, because I assumed that being asexual meant I would never find a partner. But seeing stories on here of people who do have partners, and find happiness with them, made me realize that yes, I'm asexual, no, it's not hormonal or psychological trauma or fear of men or anything like that, it's just me, and I can be happy this way. And since then I've never looked back. Basically, I agonized over my asexuality until I found a forum where I could talk to actual other asexuals, and realized it's not as bad as people made it out to be. It's not a curse or a problem, it's just a state of being, and a part of who I am.

Sure, there are moments when I wish I was on the same plane as, well, almost everyone I know in real life. Mainly wishing that others were asexual too, rather than wishing I was sexual, like a couple people have said. But for the most part, I'm happy being ace and wouldn't change it for the world.

...this was a long post. Maybe I should go into podcasting. XD

[ProdeFemme]

While "awesome" may be a tad bit strong, overall I'm perfectly comfortable with who I am so it's the most fitting ;)

[LiztheNinja]

I said I like it some days, but some days I wish I were sexual, but those days I dislike it are rare. I do enjoy being asexual almost all the time.