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Self-discovery =)
#1
Posted 14 July 2008 - 06:39 PM
Hello lovely asexies.
I have been away for a couple of months, doing some...self-searching, self-exploring, etc, etc. And I have realized something: those people who told me "you're just a repressed lesbian" were really quite right. Growing up in a crazy right-wing evangelical Christian family made even thinking that I might like women out of the question. Of course, I was quite repulsed by the idea of being with a man, although as long as there was no sex or kissing with tongues involved, a romantic relationship with a man was conceivable...which led me to AVEN. It seemed to describe me. I jumped into the community and feel in love. And, while here, I learned a lot about myself. I had to think about my own experiences of attraction...I made a radar chart. I realized that...actually, the thought of sex with a woman wasn't repulsing the same way sex with a man was--though I didn't actually desire it. I realized that, yeah...I was romantically attracted to women. So, I took on the label "bi-romantic asexual." It fit.
But, a lot has happened in the past few months. I've been forced to think about a lot and deal with a lot. And I've realized that yeah, I am a lesbian--not a sex-crazed, nymphomaniac lesbian, but still a lesbian who experiences sexual attraction. It's taken a lot for me to get here, and AVEN was an important part of that process. I love this community. Thanks for everything. =) As I continue to figure out who the heck I am and such things, I will continue to stand with you all and work for visibility with you.
I'll hang around, if that's alright with you all (I know it will be =) ). While my hiatus was necessary for self-discovery and self-exploration, I can't imagine permanently leaving this community.
I have been away for a couple of months, doing some...self-searching, self-exploring, etc, etc. And I have realized something: those people who told me "you're just a repressed lesbian" were really quite right. Growing up in a crazy right-wing evangelical Christian family made even thinking that I might like women out of the question. Of course, I was quite repulsed by the idea of being with a man, although as long as there was no sex or kissing with tongues involved, a romantic relationship with a man was conceivable...which led me to AVEN. It seemed to describe me. I jumped into the community and feel in love. And, while here, I learned a lot about myself. I had to think about my own experiences of attraction...I made a radar chart. I realized that...actually, the thought of sex with a woman wasn't repulsing the same way sex with a man was--though I didn't actually desire it. I realized that, yeah...I was romantically attracted to women. So, I took on the label "bi-romantic asexual." It fit.
But, a lot has happened in the past few months. I've been forced to think about a lot and deal with a lot. And I've realized that yeah, I am a lesbian--not a sex-crazed, nymphomaniac lesbian, but still a lesbian who experiences sexual attraction. It's taken a lot for me to get here, and AVEN was an important part of that process. I love this community. Thanks for everything. =) As I continue to figure out who the heck I am and such things, I will continue to stand with you all and work for visibility with you.
I'll hang around, if that's alright with you all (I know it will be =) ). While my hiatus was necessary for self-discovery and self-exploration, I can't imagine permanently leaving this community.
[size=1]"She is love, Oh, but never a lover
Shrinks away from the touch of his hand
From kisses and candles that stain her affection
Her love is a place he will not understand."
~"Sleeping Beauty" by Helen Trevillion.
Shrinks away from the touch of his hand
From kisses and candles that stain her affection
Her love is a place he will not understand."
~"Sleeping Beauty" by Helen Trevillion.
"And suddenly, it isn't what it used to be
And after all this time, it worked out just fine.
And suddenly, I am where I'm supposed to be.
And after all the tears, I was supposed to be here. "
~"Suddenly" by Superchic[k]
And after all this time, it worked out just fine.
And suddenly, I am where I'm supposed to be.
And after all the tears, I was supposed to be here. "
~"Suddenly" by Superchic[k]
#2 Guest_the_random_squirrel_*
Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:03 PM
Good to hear you're not just going to abandon us, and it'll be good to have you back on the board. Do you know, your posts were some of the first i read when i found AVEN and they convinced me to join.
#3
Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:40 PM
Congrats for finding yourself. 
And nice to hear you're sticking around.
I like your posts (and av
).
And nice to hear you're sticking around.
I like your posts (and av

EuroMeet in Paris - February 2010
An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex. - Aldous Huxley

#4
Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:48 PM
NO YOU MUST LEAVE.
Of course it's ok.
Good for you on your self-discovery!
Of course it's ok.
New zine about asexuality!: http://weirdterrain.org
Issue 2 is being worked on right now and will be available in August.
If you're interested in submitting something for Issue 3, get in touch!
Issue 2 is being worked on right now and will be available in August.
If you're interested in submitting something for Issue 3, get in touch!
#5
Posted 15 July 2008 - 02:32 PM
Have some nummy
.
Good for you.
Good for you.
#6
Posted 15 July 2008 - 08:19 PM
Thats fantastic
, though I don't know you I am really happy you could learn to understand your own self. I hope to get there eventually 
major congrats, though no cake because I'm sure you will get enough of that.
how about a ninja?
major congrats, though no cake because I'm sure you will get enough of that.
how about a ninja?
much lucks, good wishes, cake, and ninjas
#8
Posted 15 July 2008 - 10:53 PM
Dame du Lac, on Jul 15 2008, 10:35 PM, said:
Congratulations on working things out! More
for the journey.
You know you're not actually allowed to leave AVEN don't you?
You know you're not actually allowed to leave AVEN don't you?
mhmm. It's like the Matrix, only purple instead of green.
"Just because Science doesn't know everything, doesn't mean you can fill in the gaps with whatever fairytale most appeals to you."

--Dara O'Briain

Spoiler
#9
Posted 16 July 2008 - 03:27 AM
HEY!!!
I'm glad to see you back, and many congratulations are in order. Self-discovery is a beautiful thing. (So are women. much more beautiful than men)
I hope you continue to pepper the forums with your interesting and insightful posts...I always enjoyed reading what you have to say.

xDani
I'm glad to see you back, and many congratulations are in order. Self-discovery is a beautiful thing. (So are women. much more beautiful than men)
I hope you continue to pepper the forums with your interesting and insightful posts...I always enjoyed reading what you have to say.
xDani
just another good vibration

#12
Posted 20 July 2008 - 06:15 PM
Hey, congrats!
That's remarkably similar to how I am. When I consider sex with a man, I'm seriously repulsed to the point where I almost get sick to my stomach thinking about it, but were I with a woman, I'd be willing to have sex with her for her benefit. I would never do that with a man. I'm still questioning where that leaves me.
But congrats for finding yourself, I hope it works out for me as well
CAKE FOR ALL!
That's remarkably similar to how I am. When I consider sex with a man, I'm seriously repulsed to the point where I almost get sick to my stomach thinking about it, but were I with a woman, I'd be willing to have sex with her for her benefit. I would never do that with a man. I'm still questioning where that leaves me.
But congrats for finding yourself, I hope it works out for me as well
CAKE FOR ALL!
#15
Posted 22 July 2008 - 11:04 PM
That's cool you're figuring yourself out and all. It's always nice to know who you're attracted to and everything. AVEN is such a wonderful place to discuss topics freely

The Christmas Spirit lives within you the whole year...If you let it ~ Me
Remember this. For no one knows the way love goes ~ Last Time By Moonlight



I go by any of these names
Zant, Matt, Luke, or Midna. Pick whichever one is your favorite, lol
And my current Mibbit name is MattEngarde
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