Help
Hello lovely asexies.
I have been away for a couple of months, doing some...self-searching, self-exploring, etc, etc. And I have realized something: those people who told me "you're just a repressed lesbian" were really quite right. Growing up in a crazy right-wing evangelical Christian family made even thinking that I might like women out of the question. Of course, I was quite repulsed by the idea of being with a man, although as long as there was no sex or kissing with tongues involved, a romantic relationship with a man was conceivable...which led me to AVEN. It seemed to describe me. I jumped into the community and feel in love. And, while here, I learned a lot about myself. I had to think about my own experiences of attraction...I made a radar chart. I realized that...actually, the thought of sex with a woman wasn't repulsing the same way sex with a man was--though I didn't actually desire it. I realized that, yeah...I was romantically attracted to women. So, I took on the label "bi-romantic asexual." It fit.
But, a lot has happened in the past few months. I've been forced to think about a lot and deal with a lot. And I've realized that yeah, I am a lesbian--not a sex-crazed, nymphomaniac lesbian, but still a lesbian who experiences sexual attraction. It's taken a lot for me to get here, and AVEN was an important part of that process. I love this community. Thanks for everything. =) As I continue to figure out who the heck I am and such things, I will continue to stand with you all and work for visibility with you.
I'll hang around, if that's alright with you all (I know it will be =) ). While my hiatus was necessary for self-discovery and self-exploration, I can't imagine permanently leaving this community.
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Self-discovery =)
#1
- Asexy A-postle
- Group: Members
- Posts: 577
- Joined: 17-June 07
- Location:depends on the time of year
Posted 14 July 2008 - 06:39 PM
[size=1]"She is love, Oh, but never a lover
Shrinks away from the touch of his hand
From kisses and candles that stain her affection
Her love is a place he will not understand."
~"Sleeping Beauty" by Helen Trevillion.
Shrinks away from the touch of his hand
From kisses and candles that stain her affection
Her love is a place he will not understand."
~"Sleeping Beauty" by Helen Trevillion.
"And suddenly, it isn't what it used to be
And after all this time, it worked out just fine.
And suddenly, I am where I'm supposed to be.
And after all the tears, I was supposed to be here. "
~"Suddenly" by Superchic[k]
And after all this time, it worked out just fine.
And suddenly, I am where I'm supposed to be.
And after all the tears, I was supposed to be here. "
~"Suddenly" by Superchic[k]
#2 Guest_the_random_squirrel_*
Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:03 PM
i'm glad you've finally discovered who you are! congratulations and 
are in order!Good to hear you're not just going to abandon us, and it'll be good to have you back on the board. Do you know, your posts were some of the first i read when i found AVEN and they convinced me to join.
so thank you. and the best of luck with everything
#3
- So Asexy it Hurts
- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 6,273
- Joined: 13-January 06
- Gender:Not Telling
- Location:Hiding behind Pawprint the Admin
Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:40 PM
Congrats for finding yourself.
And nice to hear you're sticking around.
I like your posts (and av
).
And nice to hear you're sticking around.
I like your posts (and av
).
~ It takes a fool to remain sane ~
Scandinavian Meet-up - Helsinki, Finland - July 2010
Scandinavian Meet-up - Helsinki, Finland - July 2010
#4
- AVENineffable
- Group: AVEN Member
- Posts: 8,799
- Joined: 23-December 04
Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:48 PM
NO YOU MUST LEAVE.
Of course it's ok. Good for you on your self-discovery!
Of course it's ok.
Good for you on your self-discovery!
New zine about asexuality!: http://weirdterrain.org
Issue 2 is being worked on right now and will be available in August.
If you're interested in submitting something for Issue 3, get in touch!
Issue 2 is being worked on right now and will be available in August.
If you're interested in submitting something for Issue 3, get in touch!
#5
- The Atrix Has You
- Group: Members
- Posts: 1,447
- Joined: 16-October 04
- Location:Hertfordshire / Aberystwyth, UK
Posted 15 July 2008 - 02:32 PM
Have some nummy .
Good for you.
.Good for you.
#6
- Mitosis to the Max
- Group: AVEN Member
- Posts: 333
- Joined: 04-July 08
- Location:Canada
Posted 15 July 2008 - 08:19 PM
Thats fantastic , though I don't know you I am really happy you could learn to understand your own self. I hope to get there eventually 
major congrats, though no cake because I'm sure you will get enough of that.
how about a ninja?
, though I don't know you I am really happy you could learn to understand your own self. I hope to get there eventually major congrats, though no cake because I'm sure you will get enough of that.
how about a ninja?
much lucks, good wishes, cake, and ninjas
This Sig has been officially conquered by Capitan Ollie OssumPossum and his first mate the Great Devi Ravendagger
put this in your Sig and pledge, let us unite in our quest for Ultimate Internet Meme Supremacy!
This Sig has been officially conquered by Capitan Ollie OssumPossum and his first mate the Great Devi Ravendagger
put this in your Sig and pledge, let us unite in our quest for Ultimate Internet Meme Supremacy!
#7
- Asexy Samurai
- Group: Members
- Posts: 895
- Joined: 07-April 07
- Location:London, United Kingdom
Posted 15 July 2008 - 09:35 PM
Congratulations on working things out! More for the journey.
You know you're not actually allowed to leave AVEN don't you?
for the journey.You know you're not actually allowed to leave AVEN don't you?
#8
- Avengelical Prophet
- Group: Moderators
- Posts: 14,122
- Joined: 03-December 07
- Gender:Male
- Location:The North.
Posted 15 July 2008 - 10:53 PM
Dame du Lac, on Jul 15 2008, 10:35 PM, said:
Congratulations on working things out! More for the journey.
You know you're not actually allowed to leave AVEN don't you?
for the journey.You know you're not actually allowed to leave AVEN don't you?
mhmm. It's like the Matrix, only purple instead of green.
"The physicist has an idea [...]. The more he thinks it through, the more sense it makes. He consults the scientific literature. The the more he reads, the more promising the idea becomes. Thus prepared, he goes to the laboratory and devises an experiment to test it. The experiment is painstaking. Many possibilities are checked. The accuracy of the measurement is refined, the error bars reduced. He lets the chips fall where they may. He is devoted only to what the experiment teaches. At the end of all this work, through careful experimentation, the idea is shown to be worthless. The physicist then discards the idea, frees his mind from the clutter of error, and moves on to something else.
The difference between physics and metaphysics [...] is not that the practitioners of one are smarter than the practitioners of the other. The difference is that the metaphysicist has no laboratory."
The difference between physics and metaphysics [...] is not that the practitioners of one are smarter than the practitioners of the other. The difference is that the metaphysicist has no laboratory."
--Robert W. Wood, when asked to respond to the toast 'To Physics and Metaphyisics'.
#9
- Asexy A-postle
- Group: Members
- Posts: 527
- Joined: 05-February 08
- Location:Inside my head, mostly
Posted 16 July 2008 - 03:27 AM
HEY!!!
I'm glad to see you back, and many congratulations are in order. Self-discovery is a beautiful thing. (So are women. much more beautiful than men)
I hope you continue to pepper the forums with your interesting and insightful posts...I always enjoyed reading what you have to say.
xDani
I'm glad to see you back, and many congratulations are in order. Self-discovery is a beautiful thing. (So are women. much more beautiful than men)
I hope you continue to pepper the forums with your interesting and insightful posts...I always enjoyed reading what you have to say.
xDani
just another good vibration
#10
- AVENator
- Group: AVEN Member
- Posts: 3,653
- Joined: 31-August 07
- Gender:Male
- Location:Rochester, NY
Posted 19 July 2008 - 09:35 AM
Congrats!
#11
- A-Mazing
- Group: Members
- Posts: 85
- Joined: 19-April 06
- Location:phoenix
Posted 19 July 2008 - 05:20 PM
congratulations.
Home is where I want to be, but I guess I'm already there.
#12
- Mega Mitosis
- Group: AVEN Member
- Posts: 220
- Joined: 05-November 05
- Location:United States of Arseholia
Posted 20 July 2008 - 06:15 PM
Hey, congrats!
That's remarkably similar to how I am. When I consider sex with a man, I'm seriously repulsed to the point where I almost get sick to my stomach thinking about it, but were I with a woman, I'd be willing to have sex with her for her benefit. I would never do that with a man. I'm still questioning where that leaves me.
But congrats for finding yourself, I hope it works out for me as well
CAKE FOR ALL!
That's remarkably similar to how I am. When I consider sex with a man, I'm seriously repulsed to the point where I almost get sick to my stomach thinking about it, but were I with a woman, I'd be willing to have sex with her for her benefit. I would never do that with a man. I'm still questioning where that leaves me.
But congrats for finding yourself, I hope it works out for me as well
CAKE FOR ALL!
Click the baby dragons/eggs. :)
'It matters not how strait the gate,
how charged with punishments the scroll;
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.'
'It matters not how strait the gate,
how charged with punishments the scroll;
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.'
#13
- Amoeba
- Group: AVEN Member
- Posts: 63
- Joined: 02-May 08
- Location:Western Australia
Posted 22 July 2008 - 08:12 AM
It is good to see you back.
You commented on a post on my blog telling me about AVEN. So I am here!
Thank you.
You commented on a post on my blog telling me about AVEN. So I am here!
Thank you.
#14
- Mega Mitosis
- Group: Members
- Posts: 257
- Joined: 24-April 07
Posted 22 July 2008 - 09:35 PM
That's awesome!
#15
- Avengelical Prophet
- Group: AVEN Member
- Posts: 14,737
- Joined: 07-October 07
- Gender:Male
- Location:Arizona
Posted 22 July 2008 - 11:04 PM
That's cool you're figuring yourself out and all. It's always nice to know who you're attracted to and everything. AVEN is such a wonderful place to discuss topics freely
Anois, taim buartha 's fad ar shiuil an la. Ochon 's ochon o. ~ Enya "Na laetha geal m'oige"
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